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I am wondering if your son gets any additional services at school to help him with managing the work and his ADHD.This A2A turned into a piece of work and much longer than I thought it would. But what's in here might help someone so Im going to publish it anyway. I listed the accomidations I had, how exactly they were or weren't implemented, and how it helped.But, I think you really need to talk with your son and listen to what he needs and where he thinks his biggest problems are. My parents tried to help in the ways they thought would work best for years and did more harm than good. It wasn't until I was assessed by people who knew what kind of things helped other kids like me that things started to change.[TLDR; scroll down to break to see my point after the story]I have severe ADHD; was diagnosed at 11, and now at 30 I still struggle. In school, my grades were never stellar— a huge source of friction between myself and my parents, because according to everything else I should have been a good student. The letter “C” made more appearances on my report cards than the letter “A” ever did, and I was no stranger to the letters “D”, “F”, and “I” on progress reports.I was a conundrum for my parents and teachers for years because every assessment said that I was a gifted child, but my grades didn’t show it.In third grade the calls home and parent conferences started. My desk moved away from the groups the rest of the class was in, and I was sat next to Mrs A’s desk where I now faced the wall. I would be called out in front of the whole class on multiple occasions for being caught reading in a different chapter of the book than the class was or for drawing or something else.Somehow it wasn’t until 6th grade and more than three years of “consequences” before a teacher finally suggested to my parents that they get me tested for a learning disability. It was another four years before I actually got an IEP and received accommodations that actually helped.For six years my parents did everything they could think of to help me with my grades and performance in school. Weekly reports from teachers. I got rewarded if the report came back good, and punished if it didn’t. When I thought I had turned something in but the teacher said I didn’t, I was spanked for “lying” even though my mom later figured out that I often lost track of things in my desk or backpack and when it wasn’t where I expected it I thought I had already turned it in.Being spanked for getting bad grades became so bad that I wouldn’t give my progress reports and report cards to my parents when they came (back then they handed them to us at school to get signed and brought back). I just wanted to avoid the pain and the fear so badly that it didn’t occur to me that by hiding them until the school called home saying I was being given detention because I hadn't turned it in that I was actually bringing more wrath down on myself.They also paid for me to get therapy sessions to teach me how to keep organized, and while some of it helped short term, Im still a disorganized disaster. They tried tutoring at Sylvan but after they tested me and found out I was above grade level all around, they pretty much could only give me homework help which I didn't need at that point.My point to this story is that despite everything my parents did to help me perform to their expectations and my abilities, nothing that they came up with actually helped. But, after four years of being denied**, I was finally formally assessed by my high school. And to my parents surprise, the school determined that the symptoms of my ADHD were severe enough that I would get more assistance if they did and IEP and put me in the special education program than if they just gave me accommodations with a regular 504 plan.** I was diagnosed in 6th grade, and we were supposed to move at winter break in 7th grade so they wouldn’t get funding for me. We didn’t actually move until after spring break, so the next school wouldn’t even think of testing me that late in the year, and while they started testing me in 8th grade, they didn’t finish because I would need different testing in order to get the IEP they said I needed in high school. They did agree to tell the teachers to give me some extra time for things, but I got nothing formal. The legally binding stuff wasn’t finally in place until almost Christmas break in 9th grade.This was when I went from being a conundrum to becoming a Unicorn. And the accommodations that the Special Education committee suggested and implemented helped where everything else hadn’t. I say unicorn because I was the only student of my kind in the special ed program— I was in accelerated and advanced placement classes, more on that below.But with the help of the accommodations they had given me, and the additional help of finding the right med for me, I finally started getting good grades for once.The things they did that helped the most:Resource Room Access-The school had a dedicated resource room that was made for the students who needed help. It was staffed by the special ed department, and while it was mostly used for students who had accommodations, technically any student in the school could go there during study hall or with the permission of their teacher (but most didn’t). It was also twice the size of a regular classroom, and the had copies of every textbook in the school for us to use, so we never had to remember to bring them or go back to our locker to retrieve one.In the Resource room two teachers were there full time to help students— Mr M who did math and science; Mrs L who did language arts and social studies —and a third teacher/para Ms H spoke English, Spanish and French fluently was there to help with foreign languages, who was always in the resource room when I came during Spanish and often bopped in and out during other times I was there.I was required to go to the resource room for most tests and quizzes (see next entry), and allowed to ask permission to go to the resource room during any class. My regular teachers were directed to allow me to go there to complete class work or homework unless it would cause me to miss actual instruction time. Sometimes I was told to come back in X minutes, but often I stayed in the resource room for the rest of the class period. Usually I was one of a handful of students in there, so even if I finished what I was sent there to do, I stayed to keep working on homework or assignments from a different class.My #1 favorite thing of thing about the resource room was that if we gave a completed assignment to the resource teachers they would get it back to the teacher for us. This meant two things: we didn’t need to make sure that we had the time to get it back to the right classroom, but because it was passed on by the resource room it was automatically understood that the assignment was completed under accommodations and teachers wouldn’t count it late unless you were already past the allocated extra time.And because the room was bigger than the classrooms and there weren’t ever very many people in there, I went every chance I got. It was quiet, so I wasn't distracted by other students asking questions, or talking to each other or generally beung disruptuve. And it also helped eliminate any anxiety I got by finishing faster or taking longer than it seemed everyone else did and worrying I did it wrong or second guessing and changing answers.Special accommodation for tests (and sometimes quizzes)- plus accommodations for foreign language and mathematicsI got extra time to take tests, and to take them in the Resource room for all of my classes except when they required a lab for science. While I usually finished without extra time for most tests, I used the extra time for the big exams and for my Spanish class.I almost always used the extra time for Spanish because I was also allowed to have the foreign language Para help me with the test. This was also a secondary accommodation for testing that applied to my foreign language required by the school— I couldn’t read very much at all in Spanish, but if the Para read the questions out loud for me I could translate them to English to make sure I had the questions right and respond with the correct answer out loud. By doing the work out loud first, I was able to conjugate and structure the answers more fluidly than when I tried just writing the answers. For a few months time my tests were almost always oral, with the Para writing down my answers for the teacher, but once I got a better understanding of how Spanish worked I was able to write down everything myself. I still often had the Para read the questions though to help make sure I understood what they were asking.For math tests, my teachers did it differently those two years. In Geometry, my teacher would write the formulas I needed on back of the test and send me to the resource room before he handed out the test to the rest of the class. My Algebra teacher took it further by actually breaking up tests according to what was supposed to be done— one of my finals for her was actually 8 separate tests with the formula for each instead of one big test with the problems mixed up.Homework accommodations -They did this a couple different ways depending on the teacher and the assignment. In general, if I lost or forgot about a homework assignment, I was given until the next morning to turn it in. The only exceptions was that I had to acknowledge the missing assignment and notify the teacher of it; and if they had the class self-check the answers and I didn’t speak up about it, then they couldn’t be sure I didn’t just cheat instead of actually doing the work myself.If I did my homework in the Resource room, I was able to have the teachers check my work for accuracy and re-do it before turning in if necessary. Because of this, and the turn-in system they had set up, I ended up in the resource room far more than I saw anyone else.I was often in there for both of my classes right before lunch (every day for math to start homework and most days for history), and right around the corner was my Swim coach's classroom where I had study hall before we went to practice every day.At first I stayed with the rest of the team because I never could remember to pay attention to the clock to get on the bus in time because we actually left before school ended. But one day when I was particularly overwhelmed trying to finish an assignment before the end of class before lunch, Mr M made me stop and took me to get my food and come back so that I could work through lunch (the cafeteria was in a different building and students were only allowed there or in the courtyard during lunch and they had security guards at the doors to the main building). After that, Mr M actually got it added to my IEP that I was to be allowed access to the resource room during lunch and to eat there because my study hall was half as long during swim season. If I was in the resource room already one of them went with me to get food before lunch actually started until the lunch ladies and the security guards knew I was allowed. I ended up spending almost two hours in there every day finishing class work and doing as much of my homework as possible.Homework accommodation 1.2- Early in Chem class I somehow managed to derive a shortcut for a certian kind of equation. My teacher had given me a 0% on an assignment because she was grading the work as well as the answer, and according to her answer sheet my work was completely incorrect. She thought I had cheated by getting the answers from someone else.The tricky part was that I couldn't remember how I got to the shortcut formula that I used for the work. However I went to her to talk about it when I got that paper back and I showed her that I was doing the problem right but I had used the formula which made it look like I skipped some of the steps. Neither of us figured out how I got to that shortcut formula, but I showed her what I had in my notes trying to do it again and she could follow the train of thought. She agreed to only grade my work wrong if I also got the answer wrong.Projects- accomodations for big reports and projects varied from teacher to teacher and sometimes from one part of the project to the next. For example, some teachers required multiple "rough" drafts before the final draft, but I struggled with perfectionism so when I wrote a paper it was often nearly complete the first time. Some of them let me do only one rough draft instead. Others still had me do multiple, but didn't mark me down for not having as many changes ad they wanted.For other projects they sometimes had me show my progress frequently to make sure I was on track and following the rubric or instructions, or they broke it up into a series of seperate assignments that built on to each other. Occasionally they gave me the assignment earlier than the rest of the class.Other Accomodations- (in no particular order. This post is already long but Im on a roll)I was allowed to play with a fidget toy as long as it wasn't distracting other students. Usually this was a funny little ball that was made of rubber rings instead of solid. I usually just tossed it back forth from one hand to the other in my lap or under my desk.I was given a desk at the front corner of the class, but also allowed to choose to stand at work at the back of class or next to my desk if the classroom had cabinets or a table there. This meant if I was facing forward most of the class was out of my line of sight, but I could turn to see the entire room and identify who was speaking or where a sound was coming from. Being able to stand wasn't one I used in most classes because it drew attention to myself that I didn't want, but in Biology there were only lab tables not desks, so no one noticed if I stood, and the next year in Chemistry my teacher encouraged all of us to move back to the lab tables whenever we wanted to stand and several others did besides me.My teachers were required to provide me with written instructions. One of the hallmark traits of ADHD is difficulty processing verbal instructions with multiple steps and remembering those steps in the right order. For the most part teachers already had instructions or rubrics for assignments. But for things they posted on the board or put in a slideshow or overhead, they would usually give me a copy of it even if they expected the class to write it down themselves. The exception was usually in Math class, where they assigned work depending on how far we got in class that day.I was only required to maintain one binder and/or notebook for each subject. (part one)This was mostly for my math classes. My geometry teacher expected us to take notes in our binder and do homework problems in a notebook that was turned in. The homework notebook was checked during class and usually returned before class ended, but occasionally the lesson ran long and you had to come back by the end of the day or wait after class.This posed a few problems for me: I tried taking notes on loose paper but they often got lost, including the assigned problems for the homework. I also didnt take notes well enough to be able to figure out what belonged where if they got out of order. And lastly, if my notebook wasn't given back promptly I was unable to do my homework in the resource room or study hall, and if mine wasn't done before lunch I wasn't able to get it back before leaving with the swim team.(part two) If a teacher required a certain organization system for a grade I was to be given some leeway. Lost papers is my forte. So they decided that I was allowed to get extra copies of handouts and rubrics if I lost them, no questions asked and no penalty. Additionally, if I put something away wrong or had lost a piece pf work they expected to be there, I was given the chance to correct it or find the lost work before my score was given. This was mostly for my English teachers.My Biology teacher had a binder set up too, but it wasn't graded on accuracy, she checked it for completion. If any of us had lost a handout or missed class she expected us to get a copy from our lab partner, and if she had a grade for an assignment that wasnt there she wrote it down so that we could either get a copy or do it again.My teachers were not supposed to address poor scores or missing assignments in front of the class. This stemmed from my parents forcing me to get those weekly reports in the early years. Any discussion of my performance caused major anxiety for years. While they often called students up to their desk, publicly asked people to stay after class, or flat out announced it to the entire class, my IEP stated that they were to talk to me outside of class whenever possible. Most of the time they usually just caught me before class started and had a quiet word either in the hall or at my desk, and I didnt mind that, as unless you were listening you wouldn't know if we were just talking or if I was in trouble. Sometimes they would email my swim coach or the resource teachers to ask them to send me to their room or to pass on that I hadn't turned in X yet. One teacher whose room was on the opposite end of the hall where the resource room would "watch for the principle" or "explain part of the assignment" so that she could step outside with me and talk for a minute.THINGS THAT DIDNT WORK!!! (mostly from a different school that had a drastically different special ed program and was significantly smaller with less resources)Forced weekly group therapy sessions- I'll admit that at first I kind of enjoyed the "girls group". I became friends with the other girls at first, but none of those friendships lasted. I've written about this elsewhere, but there were two major problems. First they started a program that seemed unnecessarily childish for a group of high school sophmores and juniors, and they decided that the program would dictate what we discussed in group instead of the problems we were having at home and in school. Secondly, they tried to tell me that I was required to attend therapy or I would be ejected from the special Ed program and all of my accomodations taken away. Third, the group was ran by the school psychologist who was very out of touch in my opinion, and then they made it worse by bringing in the Military psychologist who made things worse when I asked her for help.Long story short, another psychologist for the school overheard my "loud discussion" with the other two and when the principle showed up he volunteered to fulfill my weekly therapy requirement so that I stayed in special Ed. That man saved my life.Special Ed study hall- My second school had a mandatory study hall/homeroom for everyone instead of a 7th period class. Again, because I was in special Ed, I was informed there were strings attached. I not only had to be assigned to one of the special ed teachers for the home room period, but I wad also required to take a second study hall with the same teacher so that I was there every day with the split schedule. This made sense at first, because it meant I got time to do homework every day still.But then I learned that none of the special ed teachers were able to help me with the math required for the science classes I took. [I didnt take any math classes at that school, I had enough credits and the rest is in the next entry]. So every other day I had a study hall where I was unable to get help if I needed it because my teachers were unavailable.Then when my schedule got rearranged senior year I got put into a study hall that included two 9th graders who were autistic— not that I have any problems with autism(!). But as a senior with ADHD I found it nearly impossible to study with them around, one spoke in an annoyingly childish voice and started every sentence with "Jamesy is.." or "Jamesy going to…", and the other had tourettes tics and an echolalia stim. I knew it wasn't their fault, but it was so hard to focus!Teachers allowed to refuse me entry to class or to follow accomodation- This one pissed off my mom the most. Again, this was at the second school. The principle refused to make his teachers actually give any accommodations. I no longer got take tests or work in another location during class time except for the one class I had in the same building. Apparently at 16/17 I was no longer allowed to be unsupervised for the amount of time it took to walk across the commons from one building to the next so I could go to the Special Ed room. Extra time was a thing of the past too.And while I was in advanced classes at my first school and tracked for AP classes, I was flat out denied at the second school by the AP English teacher and the AP Calc teacher. For a short time I was in AP Chemistry, but I was taught in a different way and the teacher refused to grade my answers if I didnt do the math the way he taught the rest of the class when they took regular Chem. He was allowed to kick me out of his class despite the other Chemistry teacher arguing that she had given me AP work to do when I was put in her class when I moved because I was so far ahead of her students.The principle actually tried to say I couldn't be in special Ed and take AP classes too. My mom threatened to sue, but I was so over it by that point.I'm still not convinced that he didnt personally make sure that my mandated special ed class was only available to me in one time slot so that I was prevented from taking any AP classes. The way it appeared to me was that I was purposely put in the English and History classes that had other special Ed students in them instead of other periods where I would have been the only one. There was only so many of us and we knew who was in Special Ed with us from homeroom or because we were given "different" assignments than the rest of the class. [more on that next]Alternate reading books/ Alternate assignments- Both my junior and senior english teachers gave me and the other special ed students the same book to read for our reading logs, while the rest of the class was allowed to pick what they read from their classroom library or get approved for one they brought. I, however had no choice. This was particularly frustrating for me because the books were obviously chosen for weak readers, with simpler content and shorter chapter. I didnt have any issue with reading though, and read for fun. So these books were always boring for me. And doing reading logs was torture, because I needed ten quotes and my own thoughts for every ridiculously short chapter. I eventually started bombing those logs by picking quotes at random and writing the most absurd or stupid responses I could come up with.Notes provided by teachers— This is the only one that was on my IEP that was not routinely done at either school.I was supposed to be given copies of the notes the teachers wrote for themselves to teach from so that I knew what information they actually planned to test us on. Most of the time I was lucky of I got just a copy of the overhead sheets or a printout of a slideshow. I never actually got anything that told me what the core information was and what was just fluff. Many teachers refused to acknowledge this part of my IEP or just told me to get someone else to let me copy their notes.I'm still shit at taking notes.