Domestic Moving Checklist: Fill & Download for Free

She wasn’t a show horse, she was a plow horse.She lived in a lakeside home that would have been worth around a million dollars had the maintenance been kept up. She was on government disability, and she had no other income. She would take in room mates to help pay bills, but she couldn’t survive without supplemental income.She wrote bad checks, tons of them. She wrote bad checks, in small amounts, in a major metropolitan county. She wrote the checks in several different jurisdictions, never too many in one place at one time. She wrote bad checks in a liberal county, in a liberal state, with liberal laws. In this state there was a presumed jail sentence on one’s fourth car theft conviction.In this county there was a whole checklist that a merchant had to get exactly correct in order for a bad check to be eligible for prosecution. Parts of the checklist included what the cashier taking the check had to do, and most of the time it wasn’t done correctly. At that point there was no point in even submitting it for prosecution, it wasn’t going to happen. Even if everything was done correctly, a bad check below a certain amount wouldn’t be prosecuted. A police department had to take several bad checks, all processed completely within guidelines, and aggregate them into a package with a large enough financial loss to generate a prosecution. Doing this took weeks of work, generally across jurisdictional boundaries, and resulted in a weekend in jail, or maybe a month in the county workhouse if one was a repeat offender. She supplemented her income writing bad checks for over twenty years.She finally fell in love. Unfortunately her girlfriend was addicted to pain killers, and they had violent domestic fights. She wound up in jail a few times for domestic assault, including threatening her girlfriend with a knife. Her girlfriend was arrested a few times for prescription fraud. Between the domestic turmoil and the extra expense of supporting the addiction of a drug addict, she finally couldn’t write enough bad checks to sustain her bills. The bank foreclosed on the house and she moved away. The house was in such a shambles it had to be torn down. I doubt she quit writing bad checks, but one never knows.

I’ve never struck a woman. But I’ve stood there really wanting to knock one onto the ground.Seriously, taking every ounce of control that I could muster to not lash out and do exactly what the woman/girl wanted. She wanted me to hit her. Not because of some form of sexual desire, but because she would win.She would call the cops anyway, and I would go to jail for the night. I would be arraigned, and later the charges were dropped.In the State of Hawaii, in the early 90’s, and maybe to this day, I’m not sure, if a call is made to the police concerning domestic violence, one person will be arrested. There is no need for any physical evidence. Guess who is most likely to go into the police car? The man.I was arrested a total of 3 times, never convicted, but I was still arrested. The cops got extremely aggravated with her. The second and third time, I just handed them my ATM card so they could hit up to the drive up ATM to pull the bail money out.In other words, she learned that the easiest way to win an argument was to have me arrested.She’s my ex-wife now. I had a daughter with her that I haven’t seen since I left. This was 25 years ago. Pay child support, but no visitation. Get visitation, she moves across the country.I would ask, does this seem like “Domestic Abuse”?Physical abuse existed, but I can defend against that. How could I defend against the above? The only option I had was to leave the relationship and leave a daughter behind.There was nothing I could do legally. Sure, I could have fought it, but I didn’t have nearly the financial resources to tackle a system that is set up the way it is.Thankfully, that is changing. There are advocacy groups for father’s rights, and women are being arrested for domestic violence a lot more than they were in the past.However, the perception that it’s only men that commit domestic violence is still strong and if a call is made to the police, you’d better be bleeding and bruised, and she’d better be completely unharmed.I know a man that was arrested because he bruised his wife’s wrist trying to keep her from hitting him.The only and best option for men is still to just… leave. Leave it all behind. It’s still incredibly hard to win custody of a child from a mother. You need to leave the children behind.Yes, you will still be required to pay child support. Yes, the legal fees to ensure you get your visitation will ruin you financially.This happens, and it’s not uncommon. It’s abuse pure and simple. The legal system isn’t fair, and only adds to the abuse.That entire situation was incredibly damaging, with lifelong effects. The walls I put up were enormous. The “red flag” checklist that I had was incredibly long when entering into new relationships. I spent time in therapy to learn that there are good women out there and that I just needed to learn how to recognize them and not paint them all with a broad brush.It’s incredibly damaging.But, here’s probably the biggest “red flag” that I see a lot of women/girls do that triggers a lot of bad feelings. I see it a lot, even on Quora.Women that feel they know how a man should behave, what a man should do, and what a man should be. They don’t just let a man be himself.I heard these words a lot when I was in the above situation.If you were a real man…If I was a real man, I would have balls and I would fight back. I would hit her. I would knock her on the ground.I always chose to not be a real man. That made her angrier.I don’t know what the percentage of men are that experience domestic abuse. I know I’m not alone. I know there are advocacy groups, and legal routes protecting men that didn’t exist when I was experiencing it. So, that tells me that I’m definitely not alone. It tells me that it was prevalent enough to draw enough attention to get laws changed, and attempts at social change.I don’t know how many, but I do know I’m not alone.

Here are 13 step-by-step tips for getting to - and through - the airport faster and more efficiently.I used these tips for a three-week, eight-country whirlwind trip through Europe. And you know what? It made flying a breeze.BEFORE CHECK-INPreparation is key to getting through the airport faster. Here's your checklist.Book Friendly ConnectionsGive yourself the best chances of having smooth connections by allowing at least 90 minutes between international flights. In cases of smaller airports or easy domestic flights, you can get away with 60 minutes.Check In OnlineYou can usually check in online up to 24 hours before the flight; check in as early as possible for the best choice of seats (see below). Don't worry about printing your boarding pass if you don't have easy access to a printer; you can pick up your boarding pass at the airport, and in some cases a bar code on your smartphone will suffice.Pick Your Seat WiselyChecking in online usually allows you to choose or change your seat. Keep SeatGuru open on another tab, so you can look at their seating plans for your flight showing the best and worst seats.In choosing your seat, the closer to the front of the plane you can sit, the faster you'll get through the airport on the other side. This is paramount!Go With Carry-On OnlyThis is crucial to getting through the airport quickly! You’ll have to lug around your bags after check-in, but you save time having to line up to check your bag, and more time yet when you cruise out of the airport on the other side while people are still waiting for their checked bags.Traveling with carry-on only isn't that difficult. I can easily travel with this carry-on packing list for up to (and beyond) three months at a time in varying climates.Bag Liquids and Keep ReadyIt's always best to seal liquids in a bag to prevent "shampoo disasters" on arrival. With carry-on luggage, seal your liquids in a quart-sized or liter-sized bag, and leave it at the top of your case. (You'll see why when clearing security).Wear the Right ShoesEasily removable shoes make the security process smoother. They also give you more freedom to get comfortable on long flights.Skip the Belt, Keep Pockets EmptyThese are just more things to remove and replace while shuffling your belongings on and off conveyor belts at security. Save yourself the hassle.Bring a PenYou just never know when you need a pen. For international travel, you'll need one to fill out departure/arrival cards and other miscellaneous tasks; don't get stuck waiting to borrow somebody else's pen.GETTING THROUGH SECURITYIf you've used this checklist thus far, your security line experience should be a relative breeze. Make it even quicker with these tricks.Get Behind Business TravelersBusiness travelers are usually frequent flyers who know how to not only choose fast lines, but how to move through them quickly: win win.Look for Lone AgentsAccording to Lifehacker, if there are two agents standing at the x-ray monitor, one is usually a trainee, which means the line will move slower. Lone agents manning the monitors will usually keep the process moving.Have Everything ReadyPack all electronics (laptops, e-readers, etc), so they can be taken out and put in the security trays. The same applies to your liquids (the ones you made easily accessible while packing, as per above). Scarves, jackets, belts, pocket contents, and often shoes need to come off. (Hint: Put anything that would go in your pockets into your jacket to limit the number of things you need to manage). While waiting in the security lineup, I usually start this process by pulling out my laptop and liquids so I can just chuck everything in the trays.WHEN YOU LANDIf you've applied the tips above, you'll be (close to) first off the plane, with your passport at the ready and forms filled to clear customs and immigration quickly. And if you're traveling with carry-on bags only, you'll be cruising out of the airport in no time flat!Here are some additional tips to keep your momentum up.Know Where You're GoingI highly suggest booking at least your first night of accommodation, and researching exactly how to get there from the airport beforehand. Between jetlag and a new (possibly overwhelming) environment, it’s best to know where to go.Pre-Book TransportationIf you're renting a car, march up to the rental desk with the confirmation number from your earlier online reservation. You can often book bus and train tickets online as well; other times you can use kiosks in the airport to buy tickets quickly.Note: This is adapted from an article I wrote for Wise Bread here: How to Get Through the Airport Faster