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Does a BPD person pushing someone away mean that they have strong feelings for that person?

In a word, yes. Some of the success stories of recovery - that is, significant improvement in quality of life - had been indicated earlier by very harsh treatment in pushing away and who they were pushing away. Some of those were brutal, spanning years and hopeless on the face of it all. Or so it seemed.Because insight — even if it is eventual — is a wonderful thing in a ray of Hope and in healing. One needs insight to finally understand that one has a disease, and that the disease can be healed by recognizing reality distortions and emotional dysregulation - as opposed to trying to endure feelings of being mistreated and neglected as one’s reality. That reality need not be so. We can choose as certainly as we choose anything. A person who wants to heal needs to consider what they are trying to heal from: mental illness or abuse? The treatments are different. People have been very glad to have a disease they can put their finger on instead of conflicts that their parents rejected them.This is why I say that it’s like waking up from a nightmare. The poor person who feels hurt by parents ‘wakes up from the dream’ when she finds the realization she has a condition which distorts her emotions and reality and not mean parents. In short, she is glad to be wrong. Like waking up from a nightmare.The beauty of this insight is that one realizes that he or she was likely not mistreated, but experienced home life as abuse and neglect. This is a distinction with a difference. Therapy strives to return to reality on the recognition that reality distortion is to blame in large part because it is just about the chief feature of BPD. Fix that and you have a wonderful improvement in quality of life. Put another way, the child was wrong. Not unusual and certainly not a crime, but it does unlock the door back to reality.[What is important is that life brings growing pains and resentments which hurt, and when they seem to come from significant loved ones, they hurt a lot more. There is in most investigations and interviews a grain of truth to the reporting of the patient and how it is experienced or endured tells the story of the reality the patient is grappling with: the therapist needs to isolate rational reactions from the inordinately painful ones which very often then reveals a normal home life and a poor resilience instead of anything accurate in ‘abuse’. You don’t want to ignore parents who might be innocent of abuse of their child. Finding out which - delusion or abuse - tell the office where to go next.]Insight within the patient - a goal for most therapists - is vital this way, and it can be begun by insight in the hopeful supporter of a patient who then leads him/her to it. It might be a therapist, it might be his/her father, the very person who is estranged by her, just because there remains a little spark of attachment. That attachment can be fairly painful for the person, but it is actually a lifeline to recovery. You can see how encouraging the BPD to estrange from loved ones is very, very ill-advised. Some do that as a so-called therapeutic measure - pals can do it out of pure spite. It don’t work nearly as well as family reunification does.The BPD is filled with fear and anxiety and continues to suffer in silence as he/she manages to keep it to himself for a long time. Parents don’t have a clue their child is enduring anything more than teen angst, so it can go on for years and worsen. Disagreements can be harsh; it is then and there that parents say that ‘it’s all in yer head’. And it is, literally, for it is distorted reality and emotional dysregulation. (It’s in the middle of the brain, actually. Anosognosia - the patient’s inability even to see they have a disease and part of Borderline Personality Disorder — is a neural deficit and it makes it hard for hurting kids to cope with the BPD experience.) All of this convinces the child that her parents don’t care when, in reality, they do care very much.The child hurts because he doesn’t understand this nor the fact that he is himself actively keeping it secret inside (isolation); all he /she knows is that mom and dad allegedly ‘don’t care’. The problem is that he is so very certain they don’t. The problem is that he/she is wrong. The problem is that this is his/her reality, and it isn’t reality at all. To him or her, their caring in parental concern is experienced as intrusive, questions are experienced as judgmental; any discussion feels like rejection and blame, and this is hell for the LGBT child. He or she is wrong about all of this and cannot see that she is wrong. (This, too, is a key to recovery and healing, too often unrecognized.) This is not blame of the child, it is insight of an illness, which means the awareness and acceptance that one has a disease and not necessarily rotten parents. It’s like having a sunburn no one else can see, but it hurts when someone touches her. Touching is a metaphor for love and concern from parents — and for her parents — both of whom are experienced by her as painful.When a child naturally loves their parents, it’s all a baffling experience for him or her, because they don’t yet grasp the rejection as a false belief, but see it when it was never there and take it as reality; it sure seems to be. The love is the reality - the rejection is not. He/ she does not comprehend the concept of reality distortion (who could at that stage?), and so they cannot understand they’re loved if all she feels is rejection. Remember that this rejection is not real - only felt as their experience of home life, their interpretation of it. It sure feels real, don’t it? Waiting lengthens, expectations increase and disappointments deepen, all thanks to reality distortion and the child’s inability to read parents’ love as sincere and genuine. And deep.Life worsens and the most significant people seem to be the most uncaring. He or she feels with intense certainty that they should know what she is going through and she is puzzled and hurt that the parents don’t seem to get it. The BPD can easily sabotage protection from parents by pushing one or both away on this delusion, and few realize it is a delusion. Better to be alone than rejected, right? Uh-uh. Sure. Who told you that?What makes it all dangerous is that the hurting child acts on those feelings and destroys the relationship, or comes damned close. Without the prime relationship healed, all future relationships will suffer. How? By applying the same formula for relationships they have applied to parents: isolation, ghosting, eventual abandonment. Before they abandon her, right?Hm. Anybody see a pattern here?The key to healing, therefore - according to the smarter therapists - is family reunification. The key to employing this is to first determine whether they are abusers or in fact not abusers; the office needs to find out, and that means interviewing the parents, not presuming they will lie. If you find they are not rats, then not only is reunification possible, but confirms the diagnosis of reality distortion and BPD for the most part. Whoo noo? The person has an illness instead of abuse trauma? Hu new?Regrets are there, too, for things like running away and the silent treatment to parents. Regrets are a good sign, actually. But make no mistake: the problem is reality distortion and emotional dysregulation so intense that it convinces the person utterly that he or she is unloved, unwanted and rejected, and that running away will help. It doesn’t, of course, because you can’t run away from a reality distortion. That false belief just goes with you wherever you go. So does the pain. Reunification can mend the whole thing by re-experiencing a normal home - perhaps one which has wised up even - one which adjusts a little to reflect that, one which cares a great deal and always has, and one which is trusted enough by her to go ahead and drop the fandom cultures who torment her further.The hurting kids have an inkling of this when they mention a thing they call re-parenting. (Hu nu?) Their version of it is to live without parents and be your own parents. That don’t work.The key is to follow through with that to its logical conclusion which is family reunification, by going back to the original parents instead of accepting substitutes such as trying to treat yerself as an adult when that is not possible at this time. It is also a very stupid and destructive therapy to get the person to adjust to a life without parental love when they have the chance to go home and experience being loved and validated for real. That alone has healing power. BPD fandom artists: call yer office.[Note: many of you sense this but don’t carry it through when you write that you re-parent yourself. This is not really possible without all the right frames of reference - such as actually being home again with your real parents solving real problems - but you’re right on one thing: the BPD needs to go home again in the literal sense of the word, not any substitute. Accepting a substitute is merely more running away, isn’t it? It is also affirming the patient’s experience as reality, and this can waste years and make things a lot worse by affirming delusions and delaying reality another year.]Meanwhile, she may still love her parents in a lasting attachment. It also hurts them because they love her, too. Why can’t they get together and heal? Because the aching emotions are so intense they must be reliable, right?Wrong. Reaallly wrong. Pride, ego and trolls within a fandom of similarly hurting BPD kids with a second baseman / second opinion get in the way of this opportunity to heal. Do not underestimate this force. It is peer pressure in a hostile form and the child needs to leave the fandom and go home. Leaving the fandom to be at home with parents can often mean growing up and leaving the cartoons for adulthood instead. When the child can do that and prefers adulthood, you have a quantum leap toward healing.And with it all spanning years in wasted time, the BPD continues the self-inflicted wounding and all other relationships.The idea with the most therapeutic value is attachment as a lifeline.Until attachment is summoned as the way to healing by way of getting back together with parents, the person experiences what I call the ‘down-on-yerself disease’. Whatever the original wound or trigger may have been, BPD has the feature of being so down on yerself that it anticipates rejection all the time (which may never come true because it’s part of the reality distortion, too) and even fills in the blanks at times with irrational explanations / interpretations / memories / dialog when it doesn’t come true, hence the constant chip-on-the-shoulder attitudes which anticipating rejection brings. This is a self-perpetuating thing. The disease as a constant reality distortion in all things significant. For insignificant things, it goes unnoticed. Feelings of abandonment are part and parcel of the condition and they play a part in the decision-making of the person in relationships such as family, since she is usually quite wrong there, especially. One poster on the wall of posters says “Your words hurt me only because you mean so much to me.”Now, that’s insight! If there is attachment, it needs to be grabbed by both hands and reel yerself in from the darkness.Come home out of the darkness.In some families, there is a sort of abandonment experience in the history - a perceived abandonment or perceived as imminent - and this doesn’t help, but it is fairly simple to overcome. It works best with parental involvement instead of freezing parents out. A clue is when the child reports being kicked out. You have to be looking for it - what the office calls an index of suspicion - and recognize it by words such as ‘they don’t care, anyway’ or being kicked out. In fact, some of these kids run away instead of waiting for abandonment. In reality, the child never was abandoned. This can be fixed.Who the BPD is the most mad at - who the person is most hurt by - is a clue of how to proceed in care by latching onto the best relationship of all and working it for healing. That is, tapping into it instead of rejecting it as hopeless. Or punishment or revenge. Refusing to trust and heed the one she is rejecting (pushing away) is a major contributor to the deterioration of the cradle relationship, namely family. Pushing away/ filling in her own irrational explanations [down-on-herself disease/inner dialog/fandom prodding] combine to affirm her delusion over time and it delays care. It cements her world view. This world view is all she has to go by on her own in her struggle for autonomy and identity. In my humble opinion, those are best found at home. They will come naturally. What she needs is the re-experience of being loved and accepted by the very people she herself pushed away — wrongly. It can be done.Where reality is the objective to recovery by insight of the facts as much as wider return to reality, agreeing with her delusion in a lame attempt to assure her reinforces the chief symptom and makes everything worse. Fandoms do this. Battle / video / cartoon cultures do this. Other BPD’s within the culture do it. Maybe they mean well, but assuring the person nothing is wrong or that parents are toxic is itself damaging.One of the main reasons mental illness is so much on the upswing epidemiologically is very little early recognition and a confusing etiology. It’s piss poor. Early recognition is critical to any treatment and healing of anything, and re-assuring people that they are alright and that caring parents are only gaslighting her is destructive to her recovery and quality of life. Remember that part next time a fandom tells a pal her parents are lying to her.Insight is the immediate goal, then, not blame, and coming to realize that one has been wrong and that one is in fact loved and wanted is like waking from a nightmare which can never torment you again. Knowing that it wasn’t real, knowing you were wrong is everything as more helpful than it first appears. This requires an artful approach. Again: not blame, but insight, as to the realization one is sick and the discovery that parents are not so toxic after all. This changes the entire direction of their quality of life from hell to healing.It shepherds the BPD by the hand out of his/her hell and back into reality where she is far safer. Some adult BPD persons are very lonely and long for relationships; they all become possible by mending the cradle one first. Because, for him/her, the insight becomes realizing they are loved and wanted after all, and has another chance to learn coping skills to battle adversities we all battle in the real world, not just her. We all have them. (Part of the hell of BPD is an inability to cope with adversity, another subject altogether.) How to handle adversities is a life skill for the BPD as much as the rest of us, and most BPD’s never acquired them. They didn’t stick around! There was always too much misread of their parents as being toxic, too much isolation to obtain just a little temporary comfort, and too much wasted time as the condition continues to get worse. And it does. New inadequate, rotten coping skills are adopted instead, such as cutting, further isolation and more delays ensue. Years are wasted away from home, listening to other people who talk her out of family reunification.One of the most powerful and satisfying gains is when the BPD child comes to appreciate he or she was wrong and that they can now not only know they are loved, but to know it when they see it. While they suffer in silence with reality distortion and their emotional dysregulation all alone, they often report that they don’t know what it feels like to be loved.No kidding.Who is targeted for this blistering pushing away is a clue as to why one should have Hope. It means one has a way to go in healing, a plan, a spark to ignite the warmth of being loved and wanted. Hope. A safety net. Too many BPD’s feel it is hopeless. It is not.If there is attachment remaining - one which is tormenting the child in two directions of hurt and loving the one who hurt her - it is a lifeline to recovery, if only they will see it as one.It’s a lifeline to healing. It means someone cares, and the vital point that it is her closest person more than she ever believed. It may be Dad he or she is maddest at. It could be a boyfriend or spouse. If the BPD can find a chance - or even an excuse - to reconnect with the person she pushes away, she may find the truth of what has really happened. And if it wasn’t what she has blamed them for all along, it has a chance. When that person is a parent, you have a real chance to heal better than any other approach and any other relationship.For life.Being wrong hurts, at first. Nobody likes to be told they are wrong. The realization that they are wrong is vital to recovery. Like waking up from a nightmare and knowing it wasn’t real. What a relief! How many would be glad to be wrong if it means recovery?And nobody likes to be told they are mentally ill, either. BPD is a mental illness. And the realization of being mentally ill is also vital. Again: what a relief! For these reasons, the best therapists will involve parents in family counseling before going too far into any approach to the patient on any assumption parents are rotten. What if they are not rotten?BPD is a fairly serious mental illness because it distorts reality so severely and takes a toll on chances of ever healing from it. But the key is in showing the patient their choice: would you rather be sick with this condition day in and day out and leave your family and regret that? — or discover you were wrong so the sun comes out or, more importantly, you come out of darkness?? Some would give anything to be wrong. Insight. Some wish their folks were different.Welp, what if they are because you were wrong about them? Hm. Hoo noo?I’ll say this again: some would give anything to be wrong about their parents. I still love you, Dad, . . . if only you weren’t an asshoal. Alright; now you find out Dad isn’t an asshoal, because he loves you so much he’s simply decided to cooperate whether he was right or not. Aren’t you a lot happier..?Dad now becomes a very important support group. The anxiety can leave, the fear can go with it, and the quality of life grows.Because, you can always blame it on the disease - where the blame rightly belongs - and get revved up for a great recovery for a wonderful life. After all, it’s nobody’s fault one is BPD, and realizing that is part of the insights that heal. Given the choice - realizing they even have a choice - some have bravely chosen the insight of being wrong about parents, for instance, as if they were having a bad dream, becoming a lot better grounded more every day from then on. They give it a try. Shrinks often refer to it as risk-taking. Some call it family reunification. Some call it re-parenting. I call it attachment recovery.Understand that this works only when parents are found to be actually not toxic or maybe very nicely cooperative in ernest and caring, and this is actually common and understated. It is important to determine this as early as possible so family can become their support group instead of being frozen out wrongly. Support group instead of fandom telling you nothing is wrong or that parents are gaslighting you. Support group instead of fandom cartoons.Support group.Keeping relationships better by finding you were loved and sorely missed all along, and enjoying a far higher quality of life from then on is well worth the effort for those who would love to heal if only they could. (Parents cooperative, not deceased, etc.) There’s a little discomfort to it, a few setbacks at times, maybe a little humility and contrition but a lot of growth in healing because the goal is reality and coping far better than one has been able to do so far. You can’t grow those two to recovery without actually experiencing the reality of home again and actually thereby solving real problems together by coping with them instead of trying to grapple with reality distortion-generated baggage. It’s like trying to feel your way in a dark room. Feelings are unreliable. For now. One’s support group shepherding them back to reality - warts and all - is infinitely preferable to reality distortion which makes life so confusing. And painful.And identity improves, too. I’d rather have a few warts on my face in the mirror than one very unclear picture of who I am.Part of the problem in mental illness is that the patient tries to solve delusional problems — or run from them. Anxiety is real, but the underlying false beliefs are not. Running away is one such example of trying to solve a delusional problem. (Part of the key to recovery is that one welcomes new problems, real ones and not delusional ones, and meeting with success far better than attempting to resolve unreal problems soon becomes optimism for the future. Translation: healing. Translation: autonomy. Translation: identity. Working with the person she is pushing away is the secret. (Hint, hint, folks!) Think Warts again: rather have a few warts in the mirror than an unclear picture of who I am. Warts, we can take care of — personal identity, I’d rather have reality no matter what. At least you can work with reality — reality distortion, you can’t.After all, who we are is in part due to what we make of ourselves. When you’re living in reality, you can cope with — and become — something better and better.[You can’t solve a delusional problem. The idea is to get rid of delusions. And because of delusional situations and emotional dysregulation, BPDs cannot do much healing alone and certainly not with rotten therapists. This is why re-parenting is a fool’s errand, unless it’s the real thing. Good instinct, but wrong execution in attempting it alone away from home as a runaway. You cannot solve a painful problem which does not exist, such as rejection or abuse that wasn’t even really there to begin with, but only a feeling. Hoo boy, and how!! And you cannot heal a client by getting him/her to accept as ‘reality’ that they have to live life without parental validation and acceptance. That stinks! It takes insight to lead another to insight on such matters, and if there is a spark of Hope and recognition (insight) in the Who is being pushed away, then you have an indicator of a reason to believe, namely attachment. Grab it and pull hard. Then it can intersect at solving real problems together, emphasis on together. More authors are remarking on reconciliation with family, especially the LGBT child. Good plan, folks. Stick with it. IMHO.]This is because LGBT kids have it hard; they are loved far more than they are told by peers, fandoms and so-called authorities. And they are loved by parents who don’t have a clue their child is suffering in silence. How would you solve this problem? By agreeing with their false beliefs??? (“There, there, yer parents a rats and bigots.”) Or turning up the warmth on love, togetherness, communication, acceptance and availability in the home? High on that list is validation and acceptance, no matter what. Kids who are told their parents are bigots are cheated out of their parent’s chance to speak for themselves and to be there for their kids. Ever think of that? Start thinking about it now.Those ‘strong feelings’ hidden in pushing away may be positive enough to take a chance to rebuild trust, having someone always to trust, someone who gets a second chance, if you want to call it that, and the courage to work at it together - setbacks and all. It’s about knowing who to trust, isn’t it? It’s a re-bonding experience in itself. It’s not so bad if the setbacks here and there are expected and felt as wonderful hormetic challenges if they help make leaps forward, actually by exercising those coping skills with aplomb and alacrity.The hormesis in the thing is how one solves real problems in adversity and gains experience, strength and resilience to life skills and calm confidence for life. I am talking about genuine problems, not delusional ones. You cannot solve problems which are not really there. In isolation in the home, the child never had the chance at the hormesis which promotes growth— the friction of growing pains, for instance, the necessary friction in the one and only place it is meaningful and authentic. Too much isolation and silence, too much parental unawareness and thick-headedness, too much crap from the outside keeps them from working together. Some kids just don’t listen to parents; some parents don’t have a clue. So, the answer today is to un-isolate and you’re on the right track. Un-abandon the parents. Working together and no more pushing away can make all the difference in the world. Because they solve genuine problems together instead of wasting time on things which aren’t even true to begin with. Not blame but insight:, especially the appreciation that the child had been pushing away for a lot longer than previously thought.Remember, the child’s abandonment of family - such as no-contact-ever-again movements for instance - is nothing but running away, and you can’t solve delusional problems by trying to escape the delusions. It’s still running away, remember? Making the effort to get back with Dad is a sign that one has stopped running. It is an indicator of courage, insight and adult follow-through.[Healing and growth. Stop defying dad and start standing up for yerself and he will respect that. You don’t have to fight. What one needs is closeness and validation and acceptance. Standing up for yerself is bonding and standing up to (against) dad is oppositional. Which do you think heals faster?]I’m a believer in medical clearance at patient intake, family counseling throughout, and I’m a believer in Hope. I’ve even seen the occasional miracle. Reattaching with the person whom one is pushing away may seem counter-intuitive to the hurting BPD adult LGBT child, but the BPD’s whole world has been a series of bad decisions based on reality distortion and unhappy experiences which were mis-interpretations all along. One can easily misunderstand a conversation and be so stinking sure Dad is a bigot, but that would be the disease talking with a little shove from the fandom and others who don’t have to live with the LGBT child’s hell. It’s time to make your own luck in catching a break by seeking reality with a little help from home, if that’s who you’re pushing away. Home may make it work while he/she is so sure - so very sure - it was making it worse... with a safety net of no rent to cough up, plenty of free food, a little sneaking around together for an adventure or two, some spending money, someone to talk to late at night, the use of a car and some trust that goes with it, and a lot of talking. Oh, and a lot of hug therapy.Because, it’s cool to find you’ve been wrong. What a relief! Sometimes, it can be miraculous.

What sort of degree would I need to become a diplomat?

Q. What should I study in my college years to become a diplomat?A. So, You Want to Be a Diplomat?Leslie (Les) McBee, Diplomat in Residence (DIR) at Cal from 2005-2007, offers his insights about how to prepare for an international affairs career and life as a diplomat. Les came to Cal from a posting as Consul General for the south of France, Corsica, and Monaco.1. Which majors/degrees are conducive to a career in diplomacy?In seeking to create a Foreign Service that truly reflects the face of America, diversity is our watchword, one which applies to the US population mosaic as well as to academic backgrounds and personal interests. Working overseas often requires harnessing all the component parts of your education in order to get the job done, so a broad basic education will serve you well. Personal flexibility, intellectual suppleness and a sincere interest in others, including the ability to communicate well and listen “between the lines,” are all excellent starting points for this career.2. Which languages should I become proficient in to maximize my efficacy as a diplomat?There is no country that America does not touch and no country that does not touch us in some way. The core function of a diplomat is maintaining, creating and, yes when needed, repairing relationships between America and other countries. A US diplomat must be an effective and productive communicator, and this most often involves mastery of the languages used in host countries. While the Department of State is currently actively seeking to augment the number of diplomats who can function in so-called difficult languages such as Chinese, Urdu, Farsi and Arabic, to name a few, it is essential to have Foreign Service Officers who are effective communicators in all languages. In any case, before beginning a new assignment, language training is given at the Foreign Service Institute so that professional proficiency can be attained.3. Will I have to sacrifice my personal beliefs and opinions if I become a diplomat?The Department of State is the part of the US Government that is responsible for formulating, implementing, and supporting American foreign policy, as well as assisting its citizens in need of help. The Department is not seeking cookie-cutter diplomats. As we live in a democracy, one always has the right to personal beliefs and opinions, and knowing, on public occasions, how to judiciously separate the personal from the professional is an important element in the practice of diplomacy.4. How much travel should I expect in my career as a diplomat?Generally, the majority of lengthy travel is from the United States to one’s next posting. After arrival, you set up house, get to know a new neighborhood, figure out practical shopping, office and school routes (if you have dependents), and essentially settle in as one would anywhere. Part of the initial adjustment period may be devoted to adapting to cultural or social differences that might require, for example, going to an open-air market for most shopping. Travel within your host country is generally one of the great pluses of Foreign Service life as it offers an opportunity for learning about and in-depth exploration of your new temporary home. Generally, postings are of 1 to 3 years’ duration.5. What are the dangers involved in being a diplomat?Much will depend on where you are assigned. In most places, the sort of “big city antenna” that you would normally use in any large American town are appropriate; in other situations you will need to consult closely with your post’s Regional Security Officer. Obviously, if you are serving in a country in which violent activity is a potential or a reality, then security officials at your embassy or consulate will have developed relevant office, residential and travel procedures to help you remain safe. In most new situations, it is usually advisable to be aware of your surroundings and to behave discreetly and not call undo attention to yourself until you know more about cultural traditions and behavior patterns. In all cases, you will receive security consultations before you leave the United States and after you have arrived at post, as a matter of course.6. What sort of preparation do you recommend to someone who will be taking the FSWE? Are there specific books to read or subjects on which to especially focus?Many people compare the Foreign Service Written Examination to the SAT, with a bit of the games Jeopardy and Trivial Pursuit thrown in for good measure. While the test is undeniably rigorous, the best possible preparation is a good basic education. Many people have found it helpful to be regular readers of “Time” or “Newsweek” or “The Economist,” all of which offer weekly exposure to significant domestic and international events. It's also very useful to have a good knowledge of American history, our intellectual traditions and how our government functions. The State Department website offers suggested readings and courses that some potential test-takers have found helpful.7. Which Foreign Service Officer track leads to becoming a diplomat?There are five traditional career tracks: Consular, Political, Economic, Management, and Public Diplomacy. An individual in any one of these tracks will hold diplomatic titles in the countries in which they serve and, over the course of a successful career, may climb the career ladder to the top rungs, even ultimately becoming competitive for an ambassadorial slot.8. If you have a specific area that you want to work in, is it necessary to have lived in that country prior to applying, or do you receive training once you are assigned?While the Foreign Service enthusiastically welcomes new officers who speak more than one language and are possibly bi-cultural, as a new employee you agree to world-wide service. The Department makes an effort to balance its geographic personnel and expertise needs against the expressed desires of an employee. For almost all assignments, training is available at the Department’s Foreign Service Institute where courses are offered on a vast array of subjects deemed necessary to assist you with having a successful posting.Working for the U.S. Department of StateHow do you become a diplomat?Why Do Diplomats Have Diplomatic Immunity? — ‘The Why’What is a Diplomatic Passport?British MP calls for reform to diplomatic immunity systemThe Diplomat (magazine)Andrew Lee, a Foreign Service Officer, highlights his current position working in the Ops Center, as well as his path to the Foreign Service, at the U.S. Department of State in Washington, D.C. March 10, 2011.What Major Do You Need to Be a Foreign Diplomat?Foreign diplomats serve as Foreign Service officers in the U.S. State Department. They represent American interests abroad, although their tasks vary by career track. For example, consular officers help U.S. citizens with passport renewals, adoptions and medical emergencies in other countries. Economic officers resolve market issues in other nations so American businesses can compete fairly for foreign trade. And political officers facilitate communications between foreign and American government officials. A bachelor’s degree from an accredited university can be helpful to entering any of these career tracks.QualificationsThe U.S. Department of State does not specify an educational level or foreign language skill for Foreign Service officers. However, most successful diplomat candidates have at least a bachelor’s degree. Popular majors include international relations, business administration, law, journalism and economics. The department also looks at work and life experiences and judges candidates on several dimensions. Contributing qualifications include cultural adaptability, oral and written communication skills, resourcefulness, initiative and the ability to lead and work with others.International RelationsArguably the most relevant major to foreign diplomacy is international studies, which is offered at many colleges and universities. More than revealing the locations and facts of foreign nations, this program of study explains how people, goods, technology, money and ideas relate to one another across the globe. It recognizes that the experiences offered by different cultures are relevant and enlightening. In addition, it demands that its students carefully analyze global issues, often from perspectives outside the American experience. It thus includes subjects from many disciplines, such as anthropology, health, political science, physics and sociology.Foreign LanguageBecause many countries operate in a language other than English, expertise in one or more foreign languages is useful for diplomats. Some obvious choices for foreign language degrees are Spanish and French because of their widespread use in many countries. The Department of State actively looks for candidates who can function in what are considered difficult languages, such as Chinese, Urdu and Arabic. Thus, majors in those languages are especially desirable. Whatever their initial language background, diplomats receive additional language training at the Foreign Service Institute until they reach proficiency.TracksDiplomats specialize in one of five career tracks: consular, political, economic, management and public diplomacy. Each of these tracks suggests one or more suitable majors. For example, business administration can be useful for management officers working in embassies. Because economic officers deal with trade, energy, technology and science, their degrees can come from economics, physical or natural science, or engineering. Political and public diplomacy officers seek to influence and inform foreign governments. Useful majors for them include communications, journalism, education and law.How Diplomats Learn Foreign Languages - Fluent in 3 months - Language Hacking and Travel TipsDiplomat - WikipediaFrench diplomat Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Périgord is considered one of the most skilled diplomats of all time.How to Become a Diplomat: Education and Career Road mapLearn how to become a diplomat with the U.S. Department of State. Research the job duties and the education requirements and find out how to start a career in U.S. diplomacy.Video TranscriptBecoming a DiplomatDiplomats, officially known as Foreign Service Officers (FSO) in the U.S., advance the economic, political, social, and cultural interests of their host nations to the diplomatic representatives of other nations. Moreover, diplomats engage in complex negotiations with their international counterparts in an attempt to ensure the continued success and prosperity of their homeland. U.S. diplomats are employed at the 270+ American embassies and consulates around the world. Some assignments might be in developing countries and considered hardship assignments. Working in an environment where individuals may not be competent in the language and might not have familiar amenities could be challenging. However, diplomats may have the opportunity to experience many different types of lifestyles and cultures.The U.S. Department of State offers five different career tracks for diplomats. An individual interested in becoming a diplomat must be a U.S. citizen and be between the ages of 20 and 59. A college degree is not necessary; however, possessing a college diploma and having the ability to speak a foreign language improves an individual's chances of being hired.Step 1: Review the 13 Essential SkillsThe U.S. Department of State seeks diplomat applicants who possess 13 certain skills, personal qualities, and abilities. Applicants must demonstrate composure, cultural adaptability, motivation, initiative, leadership, and strong written and oral communication skills. They must have the ability to analyze situations and absorb complex information from a variety of sources. Foreign Service Officers must also prioritize tasks, be fair and honest, and work well with others.Individuals interested in becoming diplomats may want to contact a U.S. Diplomat in Residence in their region of the U.S. These career diplomats provide guidance to students and professionals about jobs within the U.S. Department of State.Step 2: Select an FSO Career TrackIndividuals interested in becoming diplomats must choose a career track: consular officer, economic officer, management officer, political officer, or public diplomacy officer. Each position focuses on a different aspect of U.S. diplomacy. For example, consular officers facilitate adoptions and help evacuate Americans, while economic officers work with foreign governments on trade, energy, environment, science, and technology policies.On the other hand, management officers are responsible for U.S. Embassy operations, while public diplomacy officers promote understanding and support for American policy through engagement and influence among a country's political, academic, and other local groups.Step 3: Pass Hiring RequirementsAfter selecting a career track, applicants must pass the Foreign Service Officer test. This multi-choice exam is administered online at designated test centers and takes about three hours to complete. It measures your abilities, skills, and knowledge in three sections: English expression, job knowledge, and biographical information. Applicants must also write a 30-minute essay on an assigned topic.Other hiring requirements include submitting a personal narrative, undergoing an oral assessment, obtaining medical and top security clearances, and passing a final review panel.Step 4: Complete TrainingAfter passing your final review and obtaining all clearances, applicants' names are placed on a register that ranks successful candidates sorted by career tracks. Candidates are hired based on the needs of the department. Names stay on the register for 18 months. Applicants may decline their first appointment, but if they decline the second offer, their names will be removed from the list.Applicants who are selected for appointment must complete a 5-week orientation program that introduces them to the function and organization of the U.S. Department of State. The program includes trips to Capitol Hill and a series of case studies and practical exercises. After orientation, individuals are assigned to specialized training based on their career track. New hires can expect to spend from three months to a year in training before their first overseas assignment. All diplomats must complete at least one assignment to a region that is considered a hardship or even dangerous. In return, diplomats in hardship regions receive a 5%-35% pay differential.Navarro Moore, a Foreign Service Officer on the Political Career Track who is currently serving to the U.S. Embassy in San Salvador, discusses his path to the Foreign Service, at the U.S. Department of State in Washington, D.C. March 10, 2011.The Best International Relations Schools in the WorldForeign Policy magazine, in collaboration with the Teaching, Research, and International Policy (TRIP) project at the College of William & Mary, is pleased to present the results of the 2018 Ivory Tower survey. The survey provides a snapshot of how top international relations scholars assess their discipline at a moment when the liberal international order — overseen by a U.S. president with little evident attachment to it — is in unprecedented flux.Responses from 1,541 IR scholars at U.S. colleges and universities determined rankings for their field’s leading Ph.D., terminal master’s, and undergraduate programs. The scholars were asked to list the top five institutions in each category, and the percentages below reflect the portion of respondents who listed that school.The survey is accompanied by two essays that address whether IR is in a state of existential crisis. Can IR help policymakers respond to President Donald Trump and other global challenges that they failed to predict? Francis Gavin, the director of the Henry A. Kissinger Center for Global Affairs at the Johns Hopkins School of Advanced International Studies, argues that the field of IR’s greatest strength is its adaptability and that other university departments would be wise to take their cues from schools of international affairs. Stephen Walt, a professor at the Harvard Kennedy School and columnist for FP, suggests that IR scholars have more work to do to get their own house in order before advising diplomats on how to do the same.Illustration by Peter and Maria Hoey for Foreign PolicyRussian Foreign Ministry Proposes Expelling 35 U.S. Diplomats

What grade from A to F,would you give Donald Trump so far?

This is terrible !! Up to now I would have graded presidents A B C or C-. I am 77 years old, so I have lived through Reagan to Trump. . Trump, however, I would have to give an F. I truly wish that was not so !! I must have spent 2.000 hours the last 3 years investigating his life and his presidency. Here is why;1. HIS TWEETS, which are often not true, or just plain cruel. I hate the way he attacks individuals and gives them horrible nicknames. I have a huge problem with a president who rules via tweets. Sometimes his staff had to work around them. ex. “How can we make that idea work etc.?” Sometimes his tweets contradict what his cabinet has decided or wishes to do. He makes instant decisions without consulting his cabinet. They have to work around him.2. HIS DIVISIVENESS !! He is causing Americans ‘to almost hate each other’. The republicans hate the democrats and vise verse. Families and friendships are broken up over Trump. The good book says, “Blessed are the peacemakers.” Trump is the opposite. He divides and conquers !.(That is how dictators got into power in the past)3. THE CHAOS HE CAUSES EVERYWHERE !!! The White House has a staff turnover that is unprecedented. He actually likes to see staff get at each other and and from there he figures out what the best policy is. His management style is that of a mafia leader. (There is a lot of proof that he actually belonged to one -Felix Sater) He expects loyalty to him rather than to the USA and its constitution!! He never gets involved in writing bills etc. like other presidents have done in the past. He just orders others to do it, and if they do NOT succeed in doing it his way, he gets another person to do so. He does not help them, he bullies them. He caused chaos at the G-7 meeting, he caused chaos in the Middle East. He caused chaos at the EU, who have even looked into finding another monetary system so that would not be dependent on the US dollar. He causes chaos with his trade wars. I have read and heard others say that he actually thrives on that. He must, because he LOVES being president and would do anything to stay president for the rest of his life.4. HIS LACK OF KNOWLEDGE. He has no government experience, and does not really know how to run a White House. Senator Bob Corker said, “He knows nothing about laws or how to write a bill, cares nothing about the details and has no desire to learn.” He hardly ever reads his intelligence briefings. He makes quick decisions without really considering how it will affect everyone years from now. He has been described as lacking in knowledge, but very cunning, a brilliant conman, and strong. (Bossy really) He does not seem to have the ability to think of the long term affect of his decisions, or ask others about them. Paul Ryan now writes, “Trump knows nothing.” Just wish he had stood up to Trump while he could have. That might have saved our country.5. HIS LACK OF DIPLOMACY AND LOYALTY. The first G-7 meeting he attended, he upset everyone there. He insisted that Putin should be part of this meeting. (Putin was banished for annexing Crimea) There is a picture of Trump sitting there with his arms crossed, while all the other members were looking at him standing up as if to say, really, Trump are you going to tell the rest of us how we need to do it! He gets the democratic leaders upset by putting them down, like they are of no importance, and then sucking up to dictators like Putin and Kim Jong Un. He just comes out with the most rude things and upsets everyone. He was very rude to Trudeau, a decent man, and then right after that, he flies to a meeting with Kim Jong Un and praises him to the hills. All past Canadian Prime Ministers were perplexed and advised Trudeau as to how to proceed. They said that they had never seen anything like this before. Even the Conservatives had empathy for Trudeau ! He is loyal to Putin, who never was a friend of the USA, and disloyal to Canada, who always was a friend to the USA the last l00 years.6. HIS TRADE WARS. He bragged, ‘TRADE WARS ARE GOOD AND EASY TO WIN!!” He is waging trade wars with each country individually, and feels HE HAS TO WIN. Trump does not believe in a win-win situation ! He handles these trade wars in a way that upsets other countries, and they retaliate !! As the previous Prime Minister of Australia and other world experts explained. “Tariffs area a blunt instrument.” He claimed, for example, that Canada had a trade surplus with the USA which was not true, and so placed tariffs on them, which he had to reverse 2+ years later. He could only do so, if Canada was a ‘security threat’ which it obviously is not !! China is actually the only country that is cheating, and many experts say that they would have accomplished much more, if the democratic countries and even others, had placed pressure on China together. Now China is buying soya beans and other products elsewhere. He is messing up The WTO. International trade is very complicated and intertwined and Trump is causing stress. In one day the world lost one trillion dollars. The WTO was set up to deal with problems, like China, but Trump thinks he has to do it alone !! His motto, ‘AMERICA FIRST IS BECOMING, AMERICA ALONE !! We are going to lose in the long run. These tariffs are taxes that our companies and consumers pay for. Walmart, for example, explained that they will have to up their prices because of the tariff wars. I could come up with many examples, but you get the picture. Let me just add this. China asked India to team up to ward off USA bullying trade practices and to offset the potential impact of “protectionist” and “unilateral” trade practices implemented by the U.S. across the world over in recent months.7. HIS FOREIGN POLICIES. He left the Iran deal without consulting the other partners who helped create the deal, and now we have a serious, dangerous situation in the Middle East. Iran claims, “We cannot develop nuclear, but Trump is selling weapons to Saudi Arabia and other countries, which makes this area very volatile and dangerous.” Trump keeps selling arms to Saudi Arabia who uses these weapons to kill innocent people in Yemen. Trump seems to think he can bully other countries the way he bullies his staff.8. HIS RACISM. Just think of his tweets to the four congresswomen, known as the SQUAD. He calls all the people coming through Mexico, animals, murderers etc. (most are not) He calls poor countries from Africa ‘shit-hole countries’. Have you ever heard a president use that kind of language before? Words matter !! Puerto Rico - which is inhabited by many natives - is not worthy of help.9. HIS INCOMPETENCE His handling of the asylum seekers and other people streaming across the border. He created the problem and now he blames the democrats. THIS IS THE ONE THAT HURTS ME THE MOST. IT IS HEARTBREAKING TO SEE THOSE CHILDREN SEPARATED FROM THE PARENTS, SHOVED INTO BUILDINGS WITHOUT EVEN ROOM FOR THEM TO LAY DOWN AND GO TO SLEEP ON CEMENT FLOORS. DISEASES ARE SPREADING, AND NO MEDICAL CARE IS GIVEN. THEY GET PUNISHED FOR COMPLAINING ABOUT HORRIBLE FOOD AND GET THEIR MATS TAKEN AWAY !!! THEY GET PUNISHED FOR CRYING !!! One building has no running water. They were told to drink water from the toilet !! One baby was only 3 mo. old laying on a cement floor without a diaper. The 7 year olds have to care for the younger ones. They are cold, or too hot and are not even given tooth brushes or soap. The stench is terrible. Children are not allowed to exercise !! Of course, the Trump Admin. denies all that!! But it is interesting that government officials are not allowed inside. Only the lawyers have permission and what they saw, IS LIKE THE CONDITIONS IN CONCENTRATION CAMPS, OR WORSE. WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THESE CHILDREN IS CRIMINAL, AND THIS WILL BE WRITTEN ABOUT IN HISTORY BOOKS !! THIS IS UNFORGIVABLE !!! Once again, Trump blames Obama.l0. TRUMP’S DAILY LIES !!! He lies about everything big or small. I watched him and Kelly discuss on you tube how to stop the influx of people at the border. “Let’s make it really hard for them, separate the children from the parents, and then the people will stop coming.” When confronted about that later, he claims, “I am not doing so. It is Obama who started the separation of children from the parents !! I am putting them together again !!” He lies about the women he has assaulted. He passed a tax cut for the extremely wealthy, and then tells us, “I am not getting anything out of this. I am losing my shirt.” Then he tells his friends at Mar-a-lago later, “I just made you a whole lot richer.” Trump and his family will gain l billion dollars from that tax cut.ll. HIS CRUELTY AND UTTER SELFISHNESS. When Trump was confronted by how BADLY the children and other people at the border are treated, he said, “Well, then they should not have come !! They are still doing a lot better here, than they where in the country they came from.” THAT MAN HAS NO HEART !!! He had no problem not paying his creditors. He would just get more and more lawyers. Many contractors got stiffed by him !! When someone seriously criticizes him, he/she will get fired. He is not satisfied by simply firing someone, he wants his opponents (enemies) destroyed.12. His bragging. “This is the best, the richest country in the world. (but they can not take care of l0,000 children while spending billions more on the army as well as putting up a large military display) He claims, “I am a very stable genius. I have accomplished more than any president in history, I believe.” When something goes wrong, he blames others, but when things go right, it is due to his brilliance !13. THE ECONOMY. He says it is booming which is only partly true. He forgets that he has created the biggest deficit in history - added two trillion to it - and does not realize that many people have 2 jobs in order to make ends meet. (cuts down on unemployment) Some factories have closed !14.THE CORRUPTION AND LACK OF INTEGRITY !! He makes millions off the presidency ! He is a criminal - his entire past speaks of how he used and abused people. The Trump Foundation had to be closed because the entire Trump family used it as a check book. He must obtain money from Saudi Arabia. He sure made a lot of money from their stays at THE TRUMP TOWER. He never got rid of his businesses to prevent ‘conflict of interest.’ He makes money off his businesses wherever he can.15. HIS LACK OF CLASS, BAD MANNERS, BAD LANGUAGE which causes embarrassment to the Americans.16. NEPOTISM. He forced his staff to give ‘security clearances’ to Jared and Ivanka. Jared used it to obtain l.2 billion dollars from Qatar that he used to pay his mortgage on 666–5th Ave. He also managed to get money from other places to help him with his private business. Ivanka got many more factories built because of her father’s presidency. Ivanka’s workers in her factories in China and elsewhere are poorly paid. Kushner got 90 million from off shore investors since 2017 according to the Guardian.16. MORAL LEADERSHIP AND INTEGRITY. He is a bad example. He does not admit that he had relationships with other women, has assaulted women and does not really repent of that. He lies with the greatest ease and uses language that is a bad example for our youth. He does not show the ‘fruit of the Spirit.’ HE DOES NOT EVEN COMPARE TO THE EXAMPLES OF PAST PRESIDENTS LIKE CARTER OR BUSH.HIS VINDICTIVENESS. He always has to have the last word. When some cables were leaked and it became obvious what the AMBASSADORS WORLDWIDE really thought of Trump and his leadership - that he was inept,As a teacher, I am struggling with a question. Where can I grade him high? Well, he is tenacious! He fights on! But even that has a negative connotation. It is always about how he can grab more power, get more praise, etc. How he can get his way. I do not see a humble servant spirit there at all, like I did in Pres. Bush sr. for example, or Pres. Carter.He is very smart in his own way, not academically, but in shrewdness, knowing how he can use someoneHe frightens and worries me ! The republicans have all become TRUMPERS. They never hold him accountable for anything! He is a danger to our democracy! He wants to become a dictator and he is well on his way !!

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