Pool Addendum To Lease: Fill & Download for Free

I left the sociopath/narcissist after nearly 4 years of hell.I REALLY started seeing the signs two years prior after she tried to convince me to move to her home country with her and her children, and then tried to tell me that leaving my young daughter behind would actually be good for her. No matter how I hard I tried to logically point out why that statement wholly incorrect, I ultimately just told her what she wanted to hear because it became VERY clear that she was not interested in hearing anything that deviated from the warped conclusion that she came to.Next was the lying and rewriting history. I have ADHD and she would use that against me and try to convince me that I always forget the little details when I called her out on her behavior. And I always gave her the benefit of the doubt even though I knew that something was wrong.We were going to buy a house together so we could have more room for the children in our blended family. As we were narrowing down which house we were interested in buying, she told me that she thinks that while both our names would be on the mortgage, she felt that it would be best to only have HER name on the title of the house. I asked her some clarifying questions in hopes that she would suddenly realize that what she was asking me to do was to put myself in a financially precarious position. She said that her reasons were that in case we split up, she wouldn’t have to remove the children from the home. She then told me that we would have an addendum to the contracts stating that I would own 40% with her owning the other 60% as we had agreed. I told her that’s absolutely fine, but my name still has to be on the lease as my name is on the mortgage. She wasn’t having it. Even after I told her no bank would EVER give us a loan for a house if my name wasn’t on the title as it creates no incentive for me to pay for something that I don’t legally own. Finally, I just told her that if it was THAT important that my name isn’t on the title of the house, then my name won’t be on the mortgage either and I can just pay her rent to live in the house she just bought…. to which she replied angrily….. “What’s the point in buying a house if we’re not going to collectively use our capital together in order to provide for a better space for OUR kids!”. Yet she completely missed the whole point about why people invest in anything to begin with. The notion that I would have a problem with participating in an investment where I was expected to invest but not be entitled to any returns on the investment completely escaped her. It was at that point I pretty much knew that I was done.But then came summer vacation…..Her kids are a couple of years older than my daughter and picked on her a bit. I have a strong disdain for anyone hurting kids. Regardless of who the parents are. While on vacation, her daughter relentlessly bullied my little girl beyond anything that children normally do. Her daughter tried to run over my daughter with a bike, tried to kick her off the top of a water slide and the pool and made a point to try to trip her when she was walking. Every time I pulled her aside and told her that this was not okay and that we need to intervene to guide these kids towards more acceptable playing activities, she would tell me that I was TOO SENSITIVE or that I was being TOO EMOTIONAL! At the time when her daughter tried to make my daughter fall down, I tried to intervene. I told her daughter in the most kid friendly way that “It’s not a good idea to trip each other because if she (my daughter) gets hurt and we need to go to the hospital, then we can’t do any of the activities that we had planned or get ice cream later because we’ll ALL be sitting the the hospital’s waiting room. And sitting around waiting in the hospital waiting room is REALLY boring and we could probably come up with other ways to have fun. My narc was 3 feet from me as I said this to her daughter and chewed me out in front of all the children. She told me to NEVER discipline her kids EVER again. And as I looked at her face and saw the way she was staring at me with her special crazy look in her eyes, I knew that this has to stop now. Even though her kids were making my daughter cry at least 3 to 5 times a day. The last straw was when her daughter discretely told my 3 year old, “You will never be a part of our family”. My daughter then told her that she wasn’t allowed to be her friend anymore. That’s when my narc put her finger in my daughter’s face and told her that she was wrong to say that to her daughter and to not do it again. And my mouth DROPPED.I tried to talk to her about all of this that night after we put the children to bed to which she disregarded every word I said and had no concern about my feelings. She told me that she can’t talk to me and tried to remove herself to another part of the house as I was trying to talk to her. As she walked away, I told her that only cowards walk away from tough conversations. She came right back as sat down to talk to me. I finally got the conversation I needed to have with her as it pertained to the children, but I was talking to someone who wasn’t listening, someone who didn’t seem to care and someone who was growing impatient with our conversation, just looking for the opportunity to remove herself from the room.That night I stared at the ceiling while laying in bed next to my daughter and I realized that she will never ever change. I started thinking about narcissism, sociopathy and the neglect she endured at the hands of her mother and just knew that the longer I waited, the more my daughter was at risk.The next morning as everyone was waking up and congregating in the kitchen for breakfast, I walked right up to her and told her that it was over. I told her that I am packing up our (my daughter and I) things and that I am leaving. I also did it in front of her family which probably wasn’t the best thing I could have done, but I got the opportunity to tell her why I was leaving and her whole family got to hear it. I did this so that there was no way that she could lie to anyone about what happened. Then she tells me….. “Please don’t tell anyone about what happened here”… I told her that I wouldn’t, but if anyone asked… I was not going to lie for her.So here’s what happened after I left……First she was downright ugly towards me. Then within a few hours, she was being sweet and trying to help me by telling me that I could stay at our apartment while I figured things out. Just said thanks, but no thanks.Then we needed to settle up on finances to which she tried to trick me into giving her 300 dollars for the 5 sessions of couples therapy that she had already canceled and got refunded.She started hiding in bathrooms to avoid any mutual friends of ours that she felt was more friendly with me than friendly with her.But I think the most amusing thing of all…..One of my close colleagues had a crush on her. We’d giggle about it and then she would talk all kinds of garbage about my colleague to me and tell me how lame he was, even though I thought he was a pretty nice guy. After I got back from the trip, I saw him at work and told him what happened with the kids, narcissism, sociopathy, etc….. Within two weeks of me leaving this nearly 4 year relationship, she started dating the colleague that she had previously thought was lame, fat, etc…. the colleague I had previously thought was my friend.Initially I was in disbelief and downright angry at times…. and now I just feel sorry for my colleague because deep down, he is a nice guy. But I know that he’s lonely. My ex is a former model, career focused, charismatic and a very attractive woman and my colleague just turned into jelly whenever she was around. So on top of having a new supply lined up, she knew that dating him (have to work with him very regularly) would probably upset me. Things with the colleague got really awkward as he decided to not talk to me as much anymore… but about 6 weeks ago or so, I suddenly got a moment with him alone while out with other colleagues. I just told him that I thought he was a good guy, that I thought he and my ex made a great match and that I absolutely hold no hard feelings whatsoever. In fact, I told him that I was very happy for him and that I hope that they find love and happiness with one another. Wow, did he smile ear to ear. He seemed genuinely happy that I cleared the air for him and that I was happy for him even though I wasn’t. In fact, I pitied him so much because I knew what was coming…. I went no contact with my narc ex shortly after getting back home from that awful vacation so I have no knowledge of anything she does and I don’t want to know. However, this past week I’ve seen my colleague and he isn’t smiling at all. In fact, he seems to be moping around the office. Got a feeling that he likely told my ex that I was happy for them which of course didn’t make my ex very happy. I feel bad for him…. but it wasn’t like I didn’t warn him to begin with.Through all of this, I have been BLESSED to not have received any communications from my ex other than the indirect communication I got from her dating my coworker.If you’re able to break free from the clutches of your narcissistic partner, DO IT!!!! But just remember that doing so will also bring a massive mountain of $hit that your narc will try to place in your life. Smile and be happy you’re free and there is nothing more satisfying than knowing that you grew from the traumatic experience and there is nothing your narc can do to bring you down. They have a personality disorder and they are miserable creatures. You can’t punish them, but they will punish themselves because that’s what they’ve been doing ever since childhood.Now, I’ve got an AMAZING person in my life. Someone who respects me, my boundaries and is genuinely interested in creating something fantastic with me. After putting the narc behind you, you have clear skies moving forward.

Are you the landlord or the renter? It matters. Also, where are you, that matters too. I’ll answer for the US, in general. Though every jurisdiction varies.You want to check state and local laws as far as requirements to secure the pool. Most states/localities have very specific requirements about the height of fence, locking gates, so on and so forth. The reason for this is that pools are considered an attractive nuisance as far as children go, and people who have pools are expected to protect children and failure to do so opens them up to lawsuits. Yes, this includes other people’s children who trespass on the property and go into the pool. If security around the pool does not meet the state/local requirements, then the owner must fix it. It is most likely the owner who would be liable if the pool lacks the legally required safeguards and something happens.If the tenant invites someone to the property and they get hurt, or the tenant fails to secure a gate and a child wanders in, the tenant could conceivably be liable. The owner would likely be sued as well though. The owner could put something in the lease about indemnification related to the tenant’s negligence and liability. The owner, however, cannot escape liability for their own negligence, such as failure to have the appropriate fencing and gate. The owner should speak to a landlord/tenant lawyer about drafting a lease that addresses these issues, and also, an addendum that addresses the pool.Liability for injuries springs from negligence. If you are not negligent, even if someone is injured on the property, then you should not be held financially responsible. However, you still want to protect yourself. Accidents happen. This is why we call them accidents. Defending lawsuits is expensive. Sometimes more expensive than settling the case. This is why insurance companies sometimes settle cases that they think they could win in court. It costs less than the defense.The fundamental answer to your question is that to protect yourself you must have the correct kind and amount of insurance. You need renter’s insurance if you are the renter, and home owner’s insurance if you are the owner.The insurance should include a rider for the pool. You want to make sure that you have enough insurance to cover your risk. That means that if you have a lot of assets for which you could be sued, you want to add an umbrella policy to your insurance so that it covers you above and beyond what traditional insurance provides. Umbrella policies are not expensive. You can normally get to 1 million for between $150 and $200 per year. It is the underlying insurance that tends to be more expensive. Even with a pool, renter’s insurance should not be particularly expensive. Several hundred per year. The owner of a property with a pool will find that their insurance is more expensive due to the increased risks.Talk to an insurance broker about the insurance.

I realize I am late to answer this question and that you have already figured out what you needed to do, but for others coming here trying to figure out when to go back and contact someone after they have placed an application on a rental unit, the answer is:It would not be necessary if you placed an application with more than one place. When you are hunting for a place to stay, look at any and everything that will fit your needs. Tell each one of the places that you have "several at which I am looking this week. I'll get back with you (and give a specific day) should I decide to pursue this unit." Doing so gives a heads up to all your potentials that you are going to make them compete against each other in your market.Narrow all the ones you consider down to three. Let the ones that did not meet your final approval know and, even if they do not ask, tell them why they did not make it into your final round. You should also call the three that you have narrowed down to, but they don't need to know you have chosen them, at least, not yet. Ask these places if there have been any changes since the last time you met, any incentive offers (e.g., first month at reduced amount, pay for your moving equipment, offer of a moving crew, etc…), any unit upgrade offers (e.g., a two bath unit instead of the one bath, a balcony unit, a unit near the pool, etc…), anything that might help make them a better or more economical choice. Ask what they might be able to do to influence your decision to go with them. Let them know you are looking for their best offer, as you are making decisions today. If you have contacted them on the day you said you would be back in touch, you've done two things. You have made them aware that there are others competing for your money and you have let them know that you are considerate and thoughtful on your follow-through. They want tenants like you.From these, you would consider the individual responses to your calls and then narrow your decision down to two of the properties. Call the one that didn't make the cut and thank them for their time and willingness to compete for your tenancy, but that you have chosen a different facility/property. They do not need to know which ones you decided upon, but it is worthwhile to tell them what offers or amenities most influenced your decision. Now it is time to call the two properties with whom you will be applying. In these calls you will express your willingness to apply for their facility, however you will also be applying with one other facility at the same time. At this point you make it known who it is with which they are competing. Do not indicate what upgrades or offers you have received from the competing property. Tell them that you will be by at a specific time to complete your application, or, better yet, will start you application on line at a certain time that day/evening. Ask when you will hear back in regard to the application and let them know when you will be making your final decision on where you will reside. In most all instances today, you may time that for exactly one week plus one day from the date you complete the application. That is more than enough time with today's technology to complete your application, gain approvals and move forward to lease preparation.In three business days, you should call both properties back and confirm the receipt of your application and check to see if there was anything you missed in the preparation of the application that would prevent them from making a decision. Also ask that they respond to you in writing with anything that wound up being a negative report. Advise them to contact you should there be any issues with the application process and remind them you will be contacting them again on the day you had indicated previously to make a final decision. Doing this will also give the property the possibility of stepping up their offer to you if they really want you for a tenant. Acknowledge any offers made and let them know you would expect all offers to be part of the lease agreement when you prepare to sign. Do not think that these offers are permanent/possible until they appear in writing in your lease agreement.On the with day after you have completed your application, wait until the last office hours of the day (three hours before the office closes). If you have not heard from the facility, then you call. You start the conversation with the leasing director with "I haven't heard from you today, so I thought I had better call before it was too late to make my decision. Is there a determination on my application for your property?" Which ever property did not contact you before that time, consider them to be your second choice. You will have qualified on the application, most likely, so the next step is to have a lease put together by both properties. Ask when you may pick that up to read through it and approach your lawyer with any questions about the agreement. No, it's not necessary you have a lawyer, but you need that as a possibility should there be any questions. Go by and pick up the written leases from both facilities, spend several days reading them thoroughly. You need to see that any incentives, offers, upgrades are included in writing in the contract. If they do not appear, call and ask if it was an oversight on their part and if they will offer an updated lease or addendum to the lease. It must be in writing or they do not have to fulfill their promises. Once you have the final documents in hand, let the places know that you will return them in three business days after you have had time to read them and go over them thoroughly. At this point there is not much more room for negotiation. It can be done, but administrators get weary of reprinting a large document every time any changes are made. Keep that in mind and do not bring any counter offers to the table. The only reason you should have for a reprint is if any negotiated and agreed offers you received are not included in the document.After you spend time reviewing the leases, sign the one that is the best one for you. Return the one you did not sign in person to the property you turned down. Tell them you appreciate all the work they put into competing for your tenancy, and leave a small gift of some flowers, art, or fruit/chocolates as a concession. Take a similar gift to the property you chose to sign with, along with your signed lease. Yea, I know it seems corny, but the offices will appreciate that you know that they worked hard and will remember you as a preferred client/customer.By being actively involved in this process you will know where you and your application stand. I realize this is not always easily done in a market that is saturated with renters looking for a place to live, but all you have to remember is that landlords want the BEST tenant for their property and not just anyone who can call them on the phone and complete an application. Make them believe that they need to compete for your money, not that you are competing for their service.And, all of this to say that, YES, it is appropriate to contact your potential landlord about the status of your application.