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Hahahah…. WOW!Thank you for the unintentional boost to my morning dear writer of said question!Alright(y) then… where to begin however —Anything a 15 year old would be overheard boasting about has a very low percentage chance of being truthful (that is what a boast is - a statement designed to elicit an emotional response from the target and a potential boost in credit for charisma for the boaster) so when I was 15 there were probably times that I stated I had ‘stolen a car’ when in fact my aunt told me I could drive it to see my little friends as long as I cleaned up the doggie poopoo in her back yard when I got back or something….IN other words, “Yea it is an orange station wagon baby but you don’t have many choices when you are on the run and ya gotta steal somethin’ you know what I mean?” has a higher percentage chance of producing a positive reaction in a 14 year old girl with a bad-boy fetish than the truth…So… logically… what criminal act was the boast concerning and if the statement and or admission were in fact true — what would the responsive action require?The only time that you should react by calling the police and submitting that young man to potentially being shot to death (or someone else who happens to be much more powerful than the police and the legal system but more on that later) would be if what you heard was, “for over a year now I have selected one girl per month to kidnap and murder after raping her a few times. Then I feed her to my parents for dinner.”Of course you would then have heard that young woman scream for just a moment and then silence…. deep dark silence….Now if that is what happened then why in the Hell are you wasting time asking us go tell men and women the power to stop such a thing for crying out loud! And again I am not talking about the police but … more later.But any other thing overheard should follow this logical course:first… is it of enough importance if true to do anything?I don’t know you and you don’t know me so I am not trying to offend you here but if you heard that the kid sometimes takes a penny at the retail counter when he actually already has a penny in his pocket just don’t hire the kid to mow your lawn when you are out of town and let it die or lay if you prefer, as it is.Otherwise have a talk to the kid: you might be surprised by the quality of the exchange and he might thank you for guiding him in explaining that young girls often are attracted to bad boys but as a woman begins to mature she….. OK SCRATCH that example because you don’t want to be known as Mrs. Robinson in the neighborhood because of a simple misunderstanding but you get the idea right? You know the young man well enough to identify him and be able to ‘accidentally’ overhear what he said so maybe just address it as “Young man I am not attempting to hassle you for no cause but I overheard what you were saying the other day and I am concerned about one thing.”If you do address that young man remember that your goal must be to guide and help him - because that is your goal right?And you don’t have to read him a Miranda warning because he already knows he doesn’t have to say shit to you and even if he did you couldn’t do a damn thing about it so…. supportive and assisting in manner and accept that he might just tell you to mind your own business and piss off (as young scrappers or rappers or whatever are prone to saying these days) and if that does happen do not pursue or threaten but just allow him to leave.You might just be startled some day when that reaction… allowing him to make whatever sort of statement he wants to make and then flee… because if he does that he is in fact fleeing right? Running away from a frightening environment where an adult knows the bullshit he spreads and or the actual anti-social behavior he engages in?But back to that reaction: some day he might just stop you and say thank you for trying to help him even though he wasn’t ready to accept that he needed help at that time.And then he just might open up a bit and trust you by asking for advise concerning what he should do because of peer pressure that involves something really important and really dangerous and you will appreciate the fact that it was your patient and measured response which allowed him to trust you and you will be very glad he did because you will explain why peer pressure can be very harmful and that doing 25 years in prison just to prove to your buddy ‘Cool-J’ that you are man enough to kill someone in a drive-by shooting is nothing compared to living every anniversary of some innocent persons senseless death knowing it was caused by you so you could impress someone you respected at that time.Remember he wouldn’t be asking it if he wasn’t considering it and that means that you can’t show disdain for the gang he wants to join; instead… “you know what? I get it - those boys have money and they can toss out drugs to get the young women who seek drugs to hang out and that makes a better Friday night than playing bingo with grandma down at the center but… what will they be doing in 5 years, in 10 years or 20? Because I have never seen a gang member who didn’t regret joining that gang 20 years later have you? And I have to say that any gang that requires a complete stranger to be hurt much less murdered just to prove you can be trusted isn’t really earning your trust are they? And the next young person asked to do that might not seek out advice first but might just kill your mother or sister just to join a bunch of people who clearly have no interest in making the world a better place…. what do you think?Those are the conversations that need to take place across America today and they are not taking place as often as we need because - well communication can be hard and if an adult is asking questions like this then how can we expect the teenagers to initiate those conversations. And we really want to know when some punks start pretending they are real gangsters by randomly causing pain in the community because no real thug would do it… or in fact allow it but once again… more on that later. My point is that typically someone yells at the kid and threatens to call the cops and his job and his girlfriend and insures that no assistance will ever be sought when it is crucial that it is in fact sought right?But lets be honest here: that kid will probably never consider joining a gang right?Right….. ?Fifteen is a dangerous age for any young person: actual morality is locked in somewhere around the age of 10 but at 15 there are many tests that are played upon that moral structure because as any adult knows nothing is ever black and white and young people need to be shown those grey areas through positive enforcement and not negative judgment and threats of punishment or they will be forced away from the light and none of us wants that kid in darkness now do we…. because in just a few years he will emerge from that darkness whether we want him to or not and I know too many monsters who could have become guardians instead if only they were not…. still not the time yet to talk about that.If the attempt to speak to him fails and you observe that the behavior is escalating and getting worse (and that means that you can’t give him the “stink eye” and raise your lip whenever you see him or you will be causing his poor behavior in a way) -then… depending upon his home-life situation you will be justified in speaking to his “parent(s)” but only in the position of a concerned (not judgmental) member of the larger community family.Because after being concerned enough about what you heard to ask us… then gently and politely offering to assist the young man without threatening punishment for anything that has happened before - because you(we) really only want to curb future behavior and not punish past behavior right?After that and having him reject it - which is normal and expected - but to never return to the topic even in apology; then to witness more anti-social behavior and alarming developments without causing those determinations by placing undue and unearned scrutiny upon the young man… you have actually earned the right to investigate and by doing so “to intervene”.Phew… sounds like a whole lot of work right? Well it certainly is easier to just call one of those anonymous hotlines out there and tell the police so they can… what?It would be easier for you but our current predicament indicates that a militarized law enforcement community can wait outside the high-school for three hours while students yell at them from the windows that Harris and Klebold are both dead and that their teacher who tried to save them is bleeding to death and needs help - but those cops can’t make sure that Harris and Klebold never go into that school armed to the teeth and with the intent to murder as many as they can no matter what information you might be able to give them.I was notified that you asked for my answer for this question but I assume that you simply clicked on the first 25 boxes like the rest of us often do and didn’t ask me for any specific reason but… I am not outlining the steps and providing expectations for results concerning those steps because I am a liberal psychologist with years of approved ‘counseling experience’ but instead I am someone who learned these approaches from a men who had no problem killing anything or anyone at anytime but only if there was a ‘profit’ in it and that profit was rarely measured in currency (money) but in what my father sometimes referred to as ‘gardening my son - I am growing corn instead of weeds today’.My father was a loan-shark (who charged 25 percent to those who couldn’t get a normal loan as compared to the 28 to 32 percent many credit cards and payday loan companies charged today but… loan sharking is illegal so… ) and he was a moonshiner, drug dealer, strong arm enforcer for various large criminal organizations across the Midwest, an insurance fraud specialist, racketeering larcenist, fencing (the illegal kind not the sword fighting thing) thief and con-man who went to prison enough times that his associates often joked that he should go back for two more years so he could get his pension (18 overall). He was in fact a man of extremely violent resolve when it came to meeting what he perceived to be his needs and shockingly to most who do not understand the criminal world… when it came to protecting the community he lived in from ‘outside and uncontrolled agitation’ as he would describe it. He died in 1992 after what was probably the longest suicide in history (he started drinking heavily in 1973 when my mother died and never stopped until it finally killed him) so any criminal acts that I may have witnessed or even been involved with concerning him have long since passed the expiration of any statute of limitations which means that I never witnessed any murder involving him nor did I have enough substantiated knowledge about any murder which would require me to report that knowledge in order to solve a criminal investigation - to the best of my knowledge at least.When my father Allen Jay Miller - was 15 years old he was shot at and then arrested for stealing potatoes from some neighbors garden. This sent him pretty deep into that dark place we were talking about concerning your 15 year old and believe me when I say that sometimes when good kids get sent there, like my father was, for what they perceive as an unjust cause - sometimes they actually decide to stay there instead of beg for release or forgiveness and that is why society must stop sending so many there at a young age.My brother Rodney Allen Miller - spent about 25 years in prison overall. He was shot dead by Minnesota State Highway Trooper Chad Mills on Christmas Eve in 2004 while unarmed. He was for a time a master thief; a marijuana herbalist (at a time when being one was considered to be very bad and could earn you time in prison), a methamphetamine manufacturer, an “obtain(er) of normally expensive and exclusive items at an incredible discount… meaning he once stole 3 Case 4440 trackers from a dealership in Southern Minnesota and organized associates to drive them to Wisconsin where a farmer who also fenced such equipment paid him $300,000.00 in cash for the almost 1.5 million dollar machines - Rodney later became adept at strong arm robbery and specialized in very large crowd control (single handed(ly) controlling 20 or more individuals during robberies of gambling establishments) and for a time he invaded armed compounds of drug dealers to take their drugs and cash away. - he was a shot-caller for a famous prison gang for years and was convicted of racketeering and benefit of a gang for smuggling drugs into Stillwater MN, State Penitentiary in a bust that brought down 32 other members and 12 security guards who were paid off accomplices in the operation. He was charged and convicted with a total of four murders and… overall he was a pretty nice guy who I loved dearly and who I miss often now.He was 14 when our mother died in 1973 and when he was 15 he was punished for stealing chickens - but he didn’t steal them: in fact he and my father had made a deal with a farmer who had an old empty house on land that contained a huge number of chickens in long steel buildings:My father had been sent back to prison and Rodney attempted to keep his four brothers and sisters (14, 11, 6, and 2 years old) together so we wouldn’t be split up in foster care but one night the worst blizzard in well forever… knocked out the power and the snow was so high the next day that we had to tunnel out of the front door for almost 20 feet vertically- or exit and enter via a second floor window - but not my brother Rodney; because he had stayed up all night trying to keep those chickens from freezing to death so the farmer wouldn’t kick us out of that run down, no heat, piece of shit house - as I recall about 14 or 15 chicken did freeze to death (but of course were it not for Rodney the farmers would have lost hundreds if not thousands) and Rodney knew we were all hungry - so he chopped off each ones head and put them in a box (I remember that box clearly and sometimes see it in my sleep as clearly as if I were still standing there being asked to count the heads out loud because Rodney didn’t want me to see him chop them off) we counted them and preserved them in a box- so the farmer would have an accurate count and not think we had stolen them - we ate pretty well for a couple of days - but the farmers brother saw the box of chicken heads before the farmer could explain the deal that had been made and called the police to report a bunch of ‘vagrants’ squatting on the old family farm.Calling the cops on Rodney certainly wasn’t the optimum approach - he went so deep in that darkness we have already mentioned - that legend says he came out the other side for a while and lived an entire human lifetime with a better family where violence was never an issue and he found the comfort and love he deserved but was denied here.To this day I don’t think he went so deep because the cops were called or even because the farmer’s brother wouldn’t listen to him.I think it was because he had promised his mother before she died that he wouldn’t let the bastards take away his little brother and sisters and he had failed to live up to that promise and there was simply nothing he could do because the fact was clear that he was a powerless failure and nothing could change that so… I believe that while he was in that darkness he simply decided that if he was going to be a failure anyway then he was going to make certain that he was the most powerful failure that ever existed because one thing is certain after Rodney was 15 years old… he was never powerless again! Every decision in Rodney Allen Miller’s life from that time forward was made by him including the day he died.For some young men darkness can be a comforting friend and they soon learn that if one is at home in darkness few can compete with you if you bring them inside. I was only five years old when Rodney kept those chickens alive so my memory of the whole thing has always been pretty shallow but I will never forget seeing him through the blowing snow standing guard in the night over those damn chickens and the feeling of pure pride I had in him… because I understood even at that young age that we were the chickens and he would never leave his position for anything —- but I didn’t realize that night that society could force him to accept failure and leave. I was far too young to contemplate whether society should take us away from him just because it could take us away from him but… well… as I said Rodney was charged and convicted with four murders but I have often wondered and refused to even try to determine just how many people paid for that decision with their lives…Sigh - And then there was my brother Gary Alan Miller: To this day I don’t know how to even feel about him.The difference between what he was charged and convicted for and what he was actually guilty of was simply overwhelming sometimes: but he was convicted of theft and larceny and whatever else then of three murders (which it turned out after he died in prison I was able to discover by looking at his paperwork he didn’t actually commit… and this was sort of ironic in a number of ways).When Gary was 15 someone accused him of stealing our uncles coin collection.They never bothered to speak to him about it but instead simply told his father and called the police.Gary didn’t simply remain in that darkness but he became darkness for the rest of his life. But I have to accept that I was just as guilty in not talking to Gary and allowing him to explain who he was as everybody else in his life.Associated Press 1–14–2005STILLWATER, Minn. - A Stillwater state prison inmate who wanted to escape fashioned a dummy out of blankets and towels and set it up so it would look like he was throwing up in the sink of his cell, prison officials said.Gary Alan Miller, 43, was found about four hours later, still on the prison grounds.Revenge suspectedOfficials were afraid that Miller, who is serving three consecutive life sentences for a triple homicide, tried to break out to avenge his brother's fatal shooting by a state trooper last month, Department of Public Safety spokesman Kevin Smith said.Sorry I don’t have the original handy but my “records” hard drive is not plugged in at the moment but in any case everything said here concerning the crimes all three were arrested and convicted for is a matter of public record.Gary died in 2012 in Stillwater Prison - alone as he had always been since someone-who really should have known better than that…. all because of those damn coins.So I think I have addressed most of the things I alluded to and promised a return except one:No one in my family were heroes (except me of course because I have been completely law abiding my entire life and my clean criminal record is proof of that OR… I am a criminal mastermind who has cunningly avoided the coppers my entire adult life so bwahaha… take that pigs! The abject poverty I have lived in my entire adult life is simply a clever ploy to avert suspicion I suppose) but none of them started out as demons or deserved the destiny they fulfilled.But all three of these at least: had at least one example or event in which someone might have been able to turn the tide but failed to do so.They were outlaws and criminals and as I mentioned they lived by a strange code of honor that included protecting and defending those they believed were ‘good people’ while treating the outsider or interloper as nothing more than an enemy to get rid of - a potential threat and thus a threat that must be removed much like a bad tonsil or appendix.I recall an incident in which some lady came and sat at my father’s table and told a story about overhearing some guy talking about how he beat his wife so badly and so often that she sometimes couldn’t go to church because she couldn’t hide the bruises well enough.My father asked her if she had tried to talk to the young woman and if that story was verified or if it was possible that man was drunk and bragging about something that didn’t actually happen.The woman started to cry and said that she did go to the house but the woman would only talk through the door but she sounded strange as if her jaw might be broken.My father assured the woman that her fears just might be justified but they could be set aside at that moment because whether the story was truth or not the problem of that woman ever being afraid again was solved forever and that she would see her in church the next week.I remember thinking to myself, “What do you think you are the Godfather and now she owes you some sort of favor now?” but of course I only thought it and I was actually interested in what his resolution would be because quite a few dudes we hung around with got out of hand with a woman now and then unfortunately so… what was the issue for the old man in this?The issue was that the seed planted by that man who claimed he beat his wife had grown into a weed that my father was forced to pull - close to what he had said after the lady left.My brothers ‘opened up the old Lewis place’ which means they went to the ladies house and didn’t ask her for an explanation or even act as if they cared about her but made sure that no one was hiding in the closet waiting to get the jump on the old man and they removed the man who was accused from the property for awhile (where he was taken and whether it was against his will or not I don’t know) and the old man went into the house while I sat in a pickup and investigated in his fashion. When he came out he seemed sort of sad but when I asked him if he was sad about what was going to happen to the young man he brightened up and said, “Oh Hell no because that young man is going to be a test. He will either succeed or he will fail and I am going to make a bet in the pool for both outcomes so it is completely up to him!”A few days later I was with dad at the old “Burton Hotel” in Mankato where he had his reserved booth facing the door when the man came in by himself and asked my dad if he could sit down because he was under the understanding that he was required to have a talk with “you guys”.I was sort of confused by this because that young man only said two things, “for how long” and “yes I do understand” because my father did the talking - including the final “don’t bother saying goodbye because if you lose this bet I won’t care anyway.”This is how the conversation basically went (there is nothing verbatim here I am just recalling the general feel and basic content)My Father: “Hey there Sparky! (He called him Sparky the entire conversation and in every subsequent reference I ever heard concerning him- I don’t know why)I am so glad that you were smart enough to get here on time did my boys treat you alright the other day? Didn’t act rudely toward you or imply they was better folks than thine? Well I guess you don’t even have to answer that because I really don’t care one way or another in fact that is what this entire pow wow is supposed to convey to you - I really don’t care. But it is important that you leave this table fully understanding that I do not care because if you don’t know that as a fact then this entire event for me is going to be well… disappointing would be the best way to put it because you see rather than becoming upset that you pissed in my pool so to speak I have decided to make a game out of things so I want you to take a look at the ledger board that is above the bar there do you see it? I am quite proud of it and you might see one just like it in every bar in these parts and probably in Iowa and Wisconsin and maybe Missouri … in fact I am sure of it you are going to see a board just like that in a bar in Missouri if you are in fact stupid enough to enter any bar in Missouri or anywhere else after you exit this one of course.You see I don’t care and that is because I am not the police and there are no rules or ordinances or legal codes that control what I do or do not do; I am not some social worker who claims to care but just pisses down your back and tries to tell you it is raining but won’t let you borrow her umbrella because she knows what it is and don’t want to get piss on her umbrella now who would want that anyway? Nope I am not going to claim I care because I really don’t care.(The board in question was a nice hand-drawn display marked for bets to be taken: one either could bet on “Sparky makes it to the finish” or “Sparky no more spark now missing coil” and then along the sides there were hundreds of variable bets including dates and time of day and things such as whether it would be raining within 24 hours or oddly “during a Vike’s game” which I later assumed meant that the young man would be caught drinking a beer as he watched the Minnesota Vikings play football) my father continued, “So Sparky the point is that I did talk to at least a few people about you beating your old lady but again I want you to understand that I don’t care… the bitch probably deserved it and wouldn’t shut up although I have to admit I had a hard time hearing her when I was there because she talked in sort of a raspy whisper but I didn’t care then and I don’t care now one of my girls took special care to document her improvement and from now on one of them will spend a few minutes (nothing that should be intrusive into your privacy you understand but just a few moments every single day measuring whether she has been harmed in any way and asking her if you drank any alcohol in the previous 24 hours so I would make sure and not piss her off because whatever she says goes concerning that because I don’t care if she lies but you will so again… don’t give her a reason to. Now… here is the thing: I don’t care if you are an alcoholic or not but the board is assuming that you are and quite a few people who have already made bets have at least assumed that you are and I don’t care. I am not going to test you or follow you around because I don’t care… instead I am simply going to wait until I hear somebody… anybody at all say that they saw you drinking alcohol and then there will be no more Sparky and I will make money either way so I don’t care.What I do care about is that the person who came to me requesting that I correct this little problem might convince her husband that he shouldn’t help me make money anymore because I failed to fix it - and making that money is worth one Hell of a lot more to me than you are worth understand… so when it comes to you I do not care at all whether that board is up there for a long time or not but it is really important to you that board remains everywhere for a very long time because from this moment on you will never drink another drop of alcohol ever again (at which time the young man asked, “for how long”) I am not a fucking Judge here Sparky, I don’t put people on probation and then monitor them - you will not drink for the rest of your life - even if I die somehow my sons will take over this board and they will insure that it continues to make money Sparky so as long as you are still alive you will not drink a drop of alcohol OR… you will simply decide that you can do whatever you want and you will take a drink and of course I don’t care and I want to go through the big money bets with you so you can truly grasp the options for you Sparky. See where it says “Ends in a dead heat”? well… if you kill your old lady and yourself in a murder suicide and you can even climb a clock tower after like that tumor kid… what the heck was his name again (someone hollered Whitman) yea that is right Whitman! it doesn’t matter how many die but if you kill her or she kills herself then you die it doesn’t matter but as long as both of you die and let us be very clear here if she dies you will also die - as long as those two things happen BOOM! BABY! someone gets paid great odds (but I have to admit that the odds are going to fluctuate all over the place as my people make adjustments) and if you take the time to look there are almost an insane amount of closely tracked variables up there. And again… I don’t care. I will make more money in the long run the longer you remain alive you understand but between the overhead and the extended obligations of my boys collecting the bets and tracking everything well to be honest I do not care if you live a long time or you lose your spark today because I am going to make some profit either way.This isn’t the first one of these I have run Sparky and I think they have been around ever since ‘Machine Gun Mickey’ decided that the best way to cure a drunk who has proven he can’t control his alcohol is not a twelve step program but a two step one - you drink and you die. Easy to remember and in fact once you say it to yourself almost impossible to forget isn’t it?I do believe that I am the first to add the little penalty that if any harm comes to the little woman you also die but I think it is a fair addition considering that your problem landed on my table as if it belonged there when it really didn’t so … I don’t care. If your lady doesn’t show for whichever one of my girls is looking then Sparky loses his Spark and I don’t care.And it is unfair, I admit it but if she just happens to be a klutz and trips going down the basement stairs tonight and there is no one else to verify how she got a new bruise besides you and her well then that spot up there that has all of those bet tags on it that reads “Can’t test timing so junking the damn thing” becomes the winner and I will junk it without hesitation because I really don’t care. Oh and one more thing there Sparky… if you don’t make sure that she is the very first one at church on Sunday morning and that she is absolutely the last one to leave and that she has a smile on her face coming and going then I am going to wipe the slate clean and let everybody know that both of you moved to Belize and I will even have pictures put up showing two people that look exactly like you or at least close enough like you that no one will ever prove they are not you and call it a day son because the lesson I have learned after doing so many of these is that they can become a real headache the longer you have to track them and they require book - keeping and accounting skills that are truly staggering: now I don’t want to worry you son but my buddy Guy Kelly does all of that for me but he recently told me that he might have cancer; if he dies I will have to look around for some book smart guy who can replace him but the fact of the matter is he has been a very good friend to me for many years and as you already know… I don’t care so there is always a chance that I will go with that “wipe the slate clean” option and most of my associates know that which is why there are so many bets up there already.”Now again: just about everything there is a paraphrase of what my father actually said but it is pretty close. I had never noticed the various boards that had been hung in just about every bar I sat in: waiting for the old man but I think they were so common that I do not recall ever not seeing at least one over every bar. Yet that doesn’t mean that the ones like Sparky’s was common concerning why it was created because the men my old man hung around would bet on anything and no matter what there was always a celebration whenever one came down because whoever won had to buy the bar a round or two (this was apparently a rule) and I often witnessed everyone drinking one to whatever name was on the board at the time it came down.I never say Sparky’s come down and to be honest it might still be in play today but I highly doubt it. And I do recall that one of the bet options was ‘Sparky makes the right move’ and I asked someone what that one meant and they simply said something like, “it was an equitable divorce and he moved to safer pastures” which made me feel pretty good because because the point of the whole thing… besides having something to bet on whether it was based upon reality or not… was that a problem had been presented and the problem was absolutely solved.I wonder if Sparky had been 15 once and maybe got rough with one of his dates?Maybe if someone had talked to him and explained that slapping a woman around isn’t really safe: not in a sense of morality and certainly not if someone noticed and then brought it to someones attention who really doesn’t care - but who knows how to make a buck off of just about anything and also doesn’t care.Anyway… great question!