A Nonrefundable Deposit Of $150 Must Accompany All Reservations: Fill & Download for Free

It may be that canceling a wedding is the only initiation rite more stressful than planning it.When a couple decides to finish after sending the invitations, set aside the place for the banquet and make reservations for the honeymoon, faces two tasks perhaps as horrifying as the very fact of ending the relationship: explain it to the guests and try to recover your money.Stacey Becker, a 39-year-old New York lawyer, had had a two-year relationship and had lived with her boyfriend for three months when he proposed to her. Several months before their wedding date, which would be in August 2007, they discussed their travel plans for Thanksgiving.He wanted her to accompany him to California to visit his parents, but she had had surgery and could not travel.Although his parents had already planned to travel to New York to see them, he said he missed California. Then, she says, her boyfriend said, "Well, maybe I'm not ready to get married.""Adrenaline ran through my entire body," says Becker, who wrote a book called Knot the One: Why Getting Dumped Before My Wedding Was the Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me . (Why an abandonment before the wedding was the best thing that could happen to me)."Until that moment, he had not shown that he was not interested in getting married," she says. He mentions that he immediately retracted and justified himself by saying that he was having a bad day.However, the following month he went on a business trip and when he returned he said he still felt confused. Her friends and relatives advised her to break the relationship but the couple decided to continue and only postpone the wedding.For some time these unexpected changes before the bells that announce a wedding have been material for Hollywood films: the girlfriend who escapes in "The Graduate" (The Graduate) or the boyfriend who repents just at the moment in "The Heartbreak Kid" (The heartbreaker). Those who canceled in the past had doubts about their partners, but today's millennials focus on the symbolism of marriage."Many of my patients begin to face the transition to adulthood when they commit," says Christina Curtis, a New York psychotherapist; one of the people who this year founded a premarital counseling office called Brooklyn Premarital."A marriage in sight causes problems with personal identity to arise, to reexamine the dreams one had for oneself and ideas about the kind of person one is," says Curtis. "Distill your life. And because millennials feel that marriage is an option, they are really questioning whether it is the right choice. "A study conducted in 2013 by The Wedding Report found that 13 percent of commitments (approximately 25,000) do not end in marriage. Even so, although many people know someone who has ended the relationship before the wedding, they do not believe that this can happen to them. When it happens, it is often too late to recover the money.When Becker canceled, his parents called most of the guests. "I told my closest friends and they spread the word."His father recovered the Westchester Hilton deposit in Rye Brook, New York. The people who would record the video and take photographs also returned the deposit. Becker's exprometido recovered the honeymoon trip to Hawaii (minus a cancellation fee) because he had booked with frequent traveler miles.They canceled their gift tables at Crate & Barrel and Macy's, and returned the gifts received. She sent checks to those who had given her money at her engagement party (although no one charged them).Not all suppliers cooperated: his mother did not get the garment deposit back in Kleinfeld Bridal. Months later, when the dress arrived and the store called to schedule a test, Becker had to explain again that he was not going to get married. When the store where they bought the ladies' dresses also refused to deliver the deposit, Becker was the one who gave them the refund.Although he had studied contracts in the law school, Becker had signed a very bad one with the musicians. It included an early expiration clause, which meant that it should be liquidated when the contract was broken. She begged the group director. "He told me: 'I hope this never happened to my daughter,' and then she said she would make an exception." They just lost the deposit.The 90-day mark is a key moment: it is when many places for receptions and wedding organizers request 50 percent of their payment. To a San Diego organizer, Courtney Tibbets, a couple canceled her 91 days before the wedding. "They had clearly consulted their contract and calculated that they could not wait any longer," he said.Eve Sturges, 36, a therapist and writer from Los Angeles, canceled her wedding eight weeks before the date. She and her fiancé were going to get married on their daughter's first birthday in Petaluma, California, before 150 guests. However, they began to argue about whether they would have more children: she did want but he did not. When he suggested postponing the wedding, she was relieved.He gave his parents a list of all the providers and guests. "You need family or social support when you are dealing with such strong emotions," he said. The photographer and the florist allowed their deposits to be exchanged for points. "We sent flowers to people for a year with our non-refundable deposit of $ 500 in flowers," he said. They used the photographer's points in family photos.To notify the guests, her mother wrote by hand cards saying: "Eve and Jim's wedding is postponed indefinitely. Thank you for your love and support. " Sturges liked the writing. "An acquaintance also canceled their wedding, and sent some cards saying: The wedding 'will not take place'. That seemed very strong to me. "Finally they decided to finish. Sturges gave away her dress. He used the veil and ribbon left over on birthday party invitations. His parents stayed with the wine and the family finished it for several years.Although canceling a wedding has always been socially embarrassing, often today's weddings are a public affair in the extreme, from commitment to the honeymoon. The couples announce their commitment in social networks and chronicle their reservation of the place for the party, the contract with the musical group and the hotel they chose on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Snapchat and their own wedding website. Voyeurism makes guests feel entitled to know the history behind the cancellation.Tina Weber, 28, a video producer and resident of Union City, New Jersey, had announced her commitment in 2009 on Facebook, shortly after this network offered the option to record important events. After she decided to cancel, her mother sent cards to the guests, but Weber did not have many answers until the day she changed her Facebook relationship status from "committed" to "single." "Then I received many likes, comments and messages. Some guests wanted to know why, "he said.But an explosive announcement can also lead to interesting conversations. The head of Sturges at that time told him that many years before she had canceled their marriage two days after the wedding. Weber received an email from a high school friend who had heard about Facebook's broken engagement: "He told me he was going through the same situation and was looking for support and advice," Weber said."I wanted to know how I had done it," he added.While family and friends may receive the news with surprise, wedding planners usually take cancellations calmly. Tibbets, the wedding organizer, said: "When we see each other alone, the brides tell me: 'I'm getting really scared. Will it be just the nerves of the wedding? ' Or they start crying. "Tibbets has been canceled nine weddings in eight years. Couples almost never share the motive, although two girlfriends spoke of infidelity. The only time that Tibbets has made an exception to its reimbursement policy (she requests a nonrefundable advance payment of between $ 500 and $ 3,000 to set a date) was when a military boyfriend was called up.Although the wedding insurance can cover unforeseen events such as a call-up, bad weather or the closure of the reception area, only Wedsure, based in Toluca Lake, California, offers a "change of mind" as an additional option in your insurance against cancellation or postponement. The coverage is very limited: the wedding must be canceled at least 365 days in advance and can only be claimed by a "funder of the party", like one of the parents (but not the bride or groom).The owner of Wedsure, Rob Nuccio, said the coverage is not extensive due to abuse in the past "or, in other words, fraud.""When we started with this clause in 2007, we offered it up to 120 days before the wedding, and we received claims from the mother of the girlfriend who had bought the insurance because she already knew there was a problem."In the following years, Wedsure increased the minimum to 180, then to 270 and, finally, to 365 days. "A woman canceled because her fiance had an affair with her maid of honor," Nuccio said. "The insurance did not cover that. If the hotel had burned down, it would have been different. "When a wedding is canceled very close to the date it has been paid in full (for many, the figure is between 20,000 and 30,000 dollars, or even more), what is left for families to do? There is a website, Cancelled weddings for sale, that allows registered users to buy or sell with discounts weddings or honeymoons. Others opt for charity. Last year, the parents of a planted girlfriend from Sacramento decided to throw a free party for street people. The girlfriend did not attend. This month, The New Yorker Post reported that Yiru Sun hosted a party for low-income children on what was supposed to be her wedding day, in a luxurious place for parties on the Upper East Side. The wedding had been canceled after she had refused to sign a prenuptial contract and could not recover the $ 8,000 deposit.Once it has happened, for some there is concern that a canceled wedding is a sign of a phobia to engage in future relationships.To Becker, who finally broke up with her fiancé, a friend from a summer camp had invited her to her wedding on the same date that she was supposed to get married. I did not want to go because that day made her very sentimental, but a friend who had recently also gone through a break convinced her to go together. Now she is her husband and the father of her two-year-old son.Weber met Mike Carmelich, now her husband, at a party that was only a few weeks after their wedding canceled. After going little by little into the relationship, they got engaged. He went to http://Macys.com to register his gift table and received the message: "Congratulations, Tina and Johnny!".He wrote Carmelich's name, changed the date and began to choose new gifts.At the wedding, which took place in April 2015, she wore the dress she had not worn and could not return to Kleinfeld. It still looked good on him. When he asked Carmelich if he cared, he replied: "What does it matter? You did not even take it out of its box. "