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My boss gave me an awesome article about pronouns and how English does not have a gender-neutral singular pronoun. It’s been a problem that has annoyed grammar-junkies everywhere. In typical conversation, these things don’t matter–and we’ll use the plural “they” as a gender neutral singular noun. In writing, this becomes problematic. You can’t use a plural pronoun to replace a singular noun. But then again, you also don’t want to omit a gender. So what do we do? How do we know what to use?Why You Need These WordsIn an academic paper, you do not want to use the first person point of view or second person point of view (unless you are given permission to do so). This omits words like “I, me, we, our”; which are first person; and “you, your”; which are second person. That leaves us with third person. There is a plethora of third person words, such as “someone,” “everyone,” “everybody,” “one,” “a person,” “the reader,” and so on. There are also plural words, such as “people,” “the audience,” and “they.” There are also the gender specific words “he” and “she,” and then we also have the word, “it.”ItLet’s begin with the last example, “it.” It is a pronoun for singular objects–not people. It would be an insult if you called a person “it.” It would be as if that person doesn’t have the qualities that give him or her the ability to be a human. For example, you would use it for a desk. “The desk was very old and it wobbled a lot.” In English, most (if not all) objects are genderless. In some languages, like Spanish, objects have genders–but in English we have the singular, genderless, it.He/She and His/HerThese are also singular pronouns. As I’m sure you know, they are gender oriented pronouns. She and Her are feminine, and he and his are masculine. These are pronouns you use when referring to objects with gender (primarily people and animals). Yes, you may use gendered pronouns with animals–even birds and fish. If you can discern by color patterns or whatever else that an animal is male or female, you may use the gendered pronouns. Let’s look at some examples.“My cat loves to be brushed. She always purrs when she is brushed.” In this case, the she is referring to the cat, who is clearly a female if you look at the pronouns.“My friend went to buy a new computer since her old one died.” Notice in this case, her is possessive. The computer that “died” belonged to her.TheyLet’s get this straight–they encompasses a group of people, animals, etc. Since a group does not have a specific gender (even if the group is comprised entirely of one gender, the group ITSELF is genderless), they is considered a genderless pronoun. This goes for them and their as well. However, at the end of the day, it’s plural and is still generally unaccepted to use as a singular pronoun. Let’s look at a BAD example:“Does everyone have their pencil?” Here, their is incorrect. Since “everyone” is singular, you should use “his or her pencil.” It’s a bit irritating, I know, but that’s life.Now let’s look at a GOOD example!“Kelly and Chuck have their pencils.” In this case, we are talking about two people who possess pencils. As such, we use their. Notice in this example, and shows that we’re connecting two people (much like 1 + 1). If we had used “or,” we’d be talking about singular pronouns right now!Final ThoughtsAs much as many of us would LIKE a genderless, single pronoun, we currently don’t really have one. English is a hard thing to change and it usually takes quite a bit of time to change. Maybe someday, in the future, we’ll be lucky enough to have a singular pronoun that is genderless, but for the time being we don’t. Ask yourself when you’re writing if you’re discussing a singular or plural and you should be well on your way to gendered pronoun success. Good luck!It’s often important to use language which implicitly or explicitly includes both men and women, making no distinction between the genders. This can be tricky when it comes to pronouns. In English, a person's gender is explicit in the third person singular pronouns (i.e., he, she, his, hers, etc.). There are no personal pronouns that can refer to someone (as opposed to something) without identifying whether that person is male or female. So, what should you do in sentences such as these?If your child is thinking about a gap year, ? can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in ? findings.In the past, people tended to use the pronouns he, his,him, or himself in situations like this:If your child is thinking about a gap year, he can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in his findings.Today, this approach is seen as outdated and sexist. There are other options which allow you to arrive at a ‘gender-neutral’ solution, as follows:You can use the wording ‘he or she’, ‘his or her’, etc.:If your child is thinking about a gap year, he or she can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in hisor her findings.This can work well, as long as you don’t have to keep repeating ‘he or she’, ‘his or her’, etc. throughout a piece of writing.You can make the relevant noun plural, rewording the sentence as necessary:If your children are thinking about a gap year, they can get good advice from this website.Researchers have to be completely objective in their findings.This approach can be a good solution, but it won’t always be possible.You can use the plural pronouns ‘they’, ‘them’, ‘their’ etc., despite the fact that, technically, they are referring back to a singular noun:If your child is thinking about a gap year, they can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in their findings.Some people object to the use of plural pronouns in this type of situation on the grounds that it’s ungrammatical. In fact, the use of plural pronouns to refer back to a singular subject isn’t new: it represents a revival of a practice dating from the 16th century. It’s increasingly common in current English and is now widely accepted both in speech and in writing.Traditionally, in English, when you had to use a pronoun for a person whose sex was unknown because it had been previously referred to as a “child”, “doctor”, “researcher”, and similar, you would say “he”, “him”, “his”, or “himself”, depending on the context. For example:Take care of your child. His life depends on you.You should see a doctor. He will know what to do.Every researcher has asked himself at some point of his career whether his contribution to science was good enough.Although the pronouns were masculine, the child in the first example could have been a girl, and the doctor and the researcher could be women. However, this usage is now becoming outdated, as it is seen as stimulating gender inequality. There are several options to mitigate the issue. You can use “he or she” instead of “he”:Take care of your child. His or her life depends on you.You should see a doctor. He or she will know what to do.Every researcher has asked himself or herself at some point of his or her career whether his or her contribution to science was good enough.As you can see especially in the third sentence, this grammatical tool soon becomes clumsy if you use it too often. Another possibility is to reword the whole sentence using the corresponding plural nouns, but this doesn’t always work:Take care of your children. Their lives depend on you.You should see doctors. They will know what to do.All researchers have asked themselves at some point of their career whether their contribution to science was good enough.Finally, it is becoming increasingly widespread and regarded as completely grammatically correct to use a plural pronoun for a singular noun to refer to it in a gender-neutral way:Take care of your child. Their life depends on you.You should see a doctor. They will know what to do.Every researcher has asked themselves at some point of their career whether their contribution to science was good enough.To me, personally, such sentences sound odd because they break the most elementary grammatical rules I have been taught in school. However, there seems to be an inevitable trend for this usage to replace gender-neutral “he, his, him” in English. Note that some authors went as far as to always use a feminine pronoun, for exampleEvery researcher has asked herself at some point of her career whether her contribution to science was good enough.Please, don’t do that. It is unnecessary and confusing, unless it is clear from the context that you mean only female researchers.Ask a teacher what he or she did this summer and he or she (or should I say they) will tell you that a good deal of time is spent prepping for the next school year. Educators will also tell you that they spent the summer analyzing their prior year’s performance, what went well and what didn’t.Steve Gardiner, who’s been teaching high school English in Montana for the past 38 years, says when it comes to grading English essays he’s ready to make a change that will lessen the workload on his red pen — and yes, it involves grammar.As a high school English teacher, I have been crossing out the singular use of the word ‘they’ for many years. I have burned up hundreds of red pens, and hours of time, correcting this grammatical usage based on a traditional gender binary of he and she. It’s time to move on.Although there is historical precedent, writers like Shakespeare and Chaucer and many others who used a singular “they,” most language experts throughout the 20th century saw this usage as an error. Language evolves over time and often social changes bring about modifications in word use. The issue of the missing singular gender-neutral pronoun is one of those situations.That’s why I cheered when the American Dialect Society met in Washington, D.C., recently and voted to make the word ‘they’ acceptable and correct when used as a gender-neutral singular pronoun. The change comes during a time of unprecedented discussion about gender identity issues.For example, “Every student should do the best they can.”That statement, while true, is incorrect, at least in sense of recent grammatical usage. It should bother us when we hear it, but it doesn’t. That’s because it has become so commonplace that related sentences featuring the daily usage, even for media commentators and many other educated speakers.As a high school English teacher, I have been crossing out the singular use of the word “they” for many years.In the example above, the correct version would read, “Every student should do the best he can,” or “Every student should do the best she can.” The subject student is singular and the pronoun they is plural, so we need to use either he or she to achieve noun-pronoun agreement.Three or four decades ago, it wasn’t much of a problem. We used the pronoun ‘he’ because the masculine form was dominant. Then we lived the years of seeking political correctness and gender equity, and the ‘he’ became more often ‘he or she’ or ‘he/she’ until we realized that reading paragraph after paragraph of he/slash/she quickly became tedious.If we wanted to remain gender-neutral, we needed to avoid ‘he’ or ‘she’ and the option most readily available to us was ‘they,’ which a is a gender-neutral pronoun, but plural. Yes, it would be possible to change the subject to plural and create the sentence, “All students should do the best they can,” and that would be correct, but it does not always say exactly what we are wanting to express.The problem, then, has been that the English language is missing a gender-neutral, singular pronoun.OK, we do have ‘it,’ which is a gender-neutral, singular pronoun. But ‘it’ is generally not considered correct for use in describing a human being. We reserve ‘it’ for things or animals, so ‘it’ does not quite fill the opening, either. Most of us would not care to say, “Every student should do the best it can.” I doubt that sentence sounds correct to very many people.We, as a society, made progress on the gender equity issue, we created a consciousness, an awareness, but we never assigned a word to let us take care of the problem grammatically.To create a singular gender-neutral pronoun, we could create a new word. Several have been suggested over the years, but none have made it into mainstream language usage.Another option is to say that since most people don’t hear the singular-plural agreement problem now, perhaps the application of the usage rule has changed and the word ‘they’ is now both singular and plural, in which case the original sentence earlier in this article is now correct.Having fought this battle with students for more than three decades, I am ready to admit defeat. Every student is going to write what they want. Every broadcaster is going to say what they want. There, I even wrote it myself, and most readers probably did not notice.The use of the singular ‘they’ simply does not seem like a mistake anymore. Now that the American Dialect Society has voted that it is not an error, I can save red ink and time, if only I can refrain myself from marking it. I am willing to try.For sentences like:If a student receives a perfect score, he or she/they will get a star.Since english doesn't have a third person gender neutral singular pronoun, I find it easier to use 'they' despite it being plural because using 'he or she' just sounds clumsy. What about you? Would you use 'he or she' or 'they' in sentences such as the one above?Most people prefer to be called “he” or “she”. But others, like Kelsey, do not: they want to be referred to by gender-neutral pronouns like “they”. Should you defer to Kelsey’s preferences? Many people think no. Some, like University of Toronto professor Jordan Peterson, have recently garnered celebrity status by taking a stance against gender-neutral pronouns: “I don’t recognize another person’s right to determine what pronouns I use to address them,” Peterson has said. His view is common among social conservatives.We think people should not use gender-specific pronouns for genderqueer people – people that do not identify as men or as women. We can start here: why should we use some words, rather than others, to refer to people?A common answer among the left is because we should respect people’s preferences. If you’re talking about Kelsey, you should use whatever pronouns Kelsey prefers, and Kelsey prefers “they”.Don't call me baby: the birth of the gender-neutral ‘theyby’Many on the right believe this is dogmatic. After all, many people prefer not to use “they” for Kelsey. Whose preferences matter more? From conservatives’ perspective, liberals just assume that Kelsey’s preferences matter more than theirs, and do so in the service of a political agenda.Is that assumption misguided? Consider an analogy. As a Muslim civil rights leader, Muhammad Ali rejected the name he was given at birth (Cassius Clay) because it represented a Christian identity that he rejected. He instead chose the name Ali. But others preferred to use Clay. Whose preferences matter more? We think the answer is clear. Ali’s identity is what’s at issue, so his preferences matter more.Why should we use some words, rather than others, to refer to people?But maybe you think there is more to say about why conservatives’ preferences matter. Many on the far right rally around the mantra “There are only two genders!”. They apparently believe that calling Kelsey “they” would affirm that Kelsey is not a man or a woman – an idea they flatly reject. Peterson makes this point in exaggerated fashion, refusing to be an “ideological puppet”, or a “mouthpiece of some murderous ideology”.Here the debate typically turns to whether it is right that there are only two genders. But even if we granted this point, the argument fails. Perhaps people should not be “bullied” into affirming identities that they reject. But this does not give anyone the right to deny those identities.This point is important because of something the usual rhetoric around pronouns obscures: gender-neutral pronouns are gender-neutral. “They” does not communicate that Kelsey is genderqueer in the way that “he” would communicate that Kelsey is a man or “she” would communicate that Kelsey is a woman. “They” refrains from ascribing a particular gender to Kelsey. This is why “they” is often used in colloquial English as a singular gender-neutral pronoun for people who probably aren’t genderqueer. (“Who is at the door?” “Dunno – go see what they want.”) “They” is often used this way, and has been used this way since the Shakespearean era. It’s nothing new. (Note that even Peterson uses singular “they” in an earlier quote.)Conservatives think they should not be forced to affirm that Kelsey is non-binary. But “they” does not affirm that Kelsey is any particular gender; it just avoids saying anything about Kelsey’s gender. As long as Kelsey should not be ascribed a gender they reject, we should not use “he” or “she” for Kelsey. We can all respect Kelsey without anyone being “bullied” into being a mouthpiece for any ideology.To our mind, everything else in this debate is a distraction. The far right defends their devotion to “he” and “she” by appealing to freedom of speech. But freedom of speech at most gives us “a right to do wrong”. Arguably, freedom of speech may give you a legal right to use racial slurs. But it doesn’t make it right to use racial slurs. Exercising a right to do wrong is still a way of doing something wrong. The same goes for using “he” or “she” for those who prefer otherwise: even if freedom of speech gives you a legal right to do so, it is still wrong.Appeals to grammaticality are similar. Many opposed to gender-neutral pronouns claim that singular use of “they” is “non-standard” English; the National Review decries “stupid people” engaged in an “asinine effort” to “de-pluralize ‘they’”. The sentence “They are my good friend” may strike you as ungrammatical. But notice that we say things like “You are my good friend” with ease. Using “they” as a singular or plural third-person pronoun is no different from how we already use “you” as a singular or plural second-person pronoun.More importantly, just as we recognize the distinction between morality and law, we should recognize a distinction between morality and grammar. Doing what is morally right sometimes requires challenging legal rules. Why should grammatical rules be different?We should focus on what matters: whether and why we should (not) use particular pronouns. It is wrong to use pronouns that deny someone’s identity. This is enough to see why we should use gender-neutral pronouns for non-binary people. In fact, once we see the virtues of using a gender-neutral pronoun like “they” for some people, maybe we should just use “they” for everyone.Big changes are afoot! APA endorses the use of “they” as a singular third-person pronoun in the seventh edition of the Publication Manual of the American Psychological Association. This means it is officially good practice in scholarly writing to use the singular “they.”This blog post provides insight into how this change came about and provides a forum for questions and feedback.What is the singular “they”?The singular “they” is a generic third-person pronoun used in English. It’s not the only third-person singular pronoun—other third-person singular pronouns are “she” and “he” as well as less common options such as “ze” or “hen.”Although the term singular “they” may be unfamiliar, you’ve probably heard and used the singular “they” in conversation throughout your life. Here is an example:A person should enjoy their vacation.The noun in this sentence is “person,” and the pronoun is “their.”Before the seventh edition, people might have written the aforementioned sentence like this in a scholarly paper:A person should enjoy his or her vacation.However, this second sentence presumes that a person uses either the pronoun “he” or the pronoun “she,” which is not necessarily the case. For example, some people use other pronouns, including “they,” “zir,” “ze,” “xe,” “hir,” “per,” “ve,” “ey,” and “hen.”Why use the singular “they”?When readers see a gendered pronoun, they make assumptions about the gender of the person being described (Gastil, 1990; Moulton et al., 1978). APA advocates for the singular “they” because it is inclusive of all people and helps writers avoid making assumptions about gender.When should I use the singular “they”?Writers should use the singular “they” in two main cases: (a) when referring to a generic person whose gender is unknown or irrelevant to the context and (b) when referring to a specific, known person who uses “they” as their pronoun.When referring to a generic person whose gender is unknown or irrelevant to the context, use the singular “they” as the pronoun. For example, if you use nouns like “person,” “individual,” or “everyone” or phrases like “every teacher” or “each nurse” in a sentence, use the appropriate form of the pronoun “they” as needed.Each student submitted their art portfolio to the committee.notEach student submitted his or her art portfolio to the committee.If you are writing about a specific, known person, always use that person’s pronouns. The person’s pronouns might be “she/her,” “they/them,” “he/him,” or something else—just ask to find out! It is also good practice for an individual to volunteer what pronouns they use so that others do not have to ask.If a person uses “she” or “he,” do not use “they” instead. Likewise, if a person uses “they,” do not switch to “he” or “she.” Use the pronouns the person uses.Kai is a nonbinary person. They attend university in their home state of Vermont and are majoring in chemistry. Kai’s friend River is a transgender woman. She attends the same university and is majoring in physics.What verbs do I use with the singular “they”?When “they” is the subject of a sentence, “they” takes a plural verb regardless of whether “they” is meant to be singular or plural. For example, write “they are,” not “they is.” The singular “they” works similarly to the singular “you”—even though “you” may refer to one person or multiple people, in a scholarly paper you should write “you are,” not “you is.” However, if the noun in one sentence is a word like “individual” or a person’s name, use a singular verb.Every individual is unique. They are a combination of strengths and weaknesses.notEvery individual is unique. They is a combination of strengths and weaknesses.Every individual is unique. She or he is a combination of strengths and weaknesses.Read more about plural verb forms for the singular “they” from the folks at Merriam-Webster.What is a generic person, anyway?Some people write about a generic person but give that generic person gendered qualities. For example, someone might write about “Jane Doe” and intend that Jane be a woman who uses “she/her” pronouns. In that case, it would be acceptable to use the pronoun “she” to refer to Jane because Jane is meant to be a generic woman who uses “she/her” pronouns, not a generic person who might use any pronouns.Use the singular “they” when the generic person is truly generic—devoid of gendered qualities. When describing generic people, it is easiest to avoid names (or to pick names without an obvious gender association) to avoid this confusion.What if I don’t like the singular “they”—do I have to use it?If you are writing about a person who uses “they” as their pronoun, then yes, you have to use it. Respectful and inclusive language is important. And it’s part of APA Style.If you are writing about a generic person, you should use the singular “they” if your sentence includes a pronoun. However, there are many ways to write grammatical and inclusive sentences. For example, you can rewrite a sentence in the plural to use plural pronouns, or you can rewrite a sentence so that it does not use pronouns at all.Here are some examples:People should enjoy their vacations.A person should enjoy vacations.A vacation should be enjoyable.These sentences are just as grammatical and inclusive as “A person should enjoy their vacation.”Where did the change come from?Experts in sexual orientation and gender diversity crafted APA’s bias-free language guidelines for writing about gender, including the guidance on singular “they.”You can read the bias-free language guidelines in full on the APA Style website. These guidelines cover not only how to write about gender but also age, disability, participation in research, racial and ethnic identity, sexual orientation, socioeconomic status, and intersectionality.APA is also not alone in the singular “they” movement. Although usage of the singular “they” was once discouraged in academic writing, many advocacy groups and publishers have accepted and endorsed it, including Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary.

My boss gave me an awesome article about pronouns and how English does not have a gender-neutral singular pronoun. It’s been a problem that has annoyed grammar-junkies everywhere. In typical conversation, these things don’t matter–and we’ll use the plural “they” as a gender neutral singular noun. In writing, this becomes problematic. You can’t use a plural pronoun to replace a singular noun. But then again, you also don’t want to omit a gender. So what do we do? How do we know what to use?Why You Need These WordsIn an academic paper, you do not want to use the first person point of view or second person point of view (unless you are given permission to do so). This omits words like “I, me, we, our”; which are first person; and “you, your”; which are second person. That leaves us with third person. There is a plethora of third person words, such as “someone,” “everyone,” “everybody,” “one,” “a person,” “the reader,” and so on. There are also plural words, such as “people,” “the audience,” and “they.” There are also the gender specific words “he” and “she,” and then we also have the word, “it.”ItLet’s begin with the last example, “it.” It is a pronoun for singular objects–not people. It would be an insult if you called a person “it.” It would be as if that person doesn’t have the qualities that give him or her the ability to be a human. For example, you would use it for a desk. “The desk was very old and it wobbled a lot.” In English, most (if not all) objects are genderless. In some languages, like Spanish, objects have genders–but in English we have the singular, genderless, it.He/She and His/HerThese are also singular pronouns. As I’m sure you know, they are gender oriented pronouns. She and Her are feminine, and he and his are masculine. These are pronouns you use when referring to objects with gender (primarily people and animals). Yes, you may use gendered pronouns with animals–even birds and fish. If you can discern by color patterns or whatever else that an animal is male or female, you may use the gendered pronouns. Let’s look at some examples.“My cat loves to be brushed. She always purrs when she is brushed.” In this case, the she is referring to the cat, who is clearly a female if you look at the pronouns.“My friend went to buy a new computer since her old one died.” Notice in this case, her is possessive. The computer that “died” belonged to her.TheyLet’s get this straight–they encompasses a group of people, animals, etc. Since a group does not have a specific gender (even if the group is comprised entirely of one gender, the group ITSELF is genderless), they is considered a genderless pronoun. This goes for them and their as well. However, at the end of the day, it’s plural and is still generally unaccepted to use as a singular pronoun. Let’s look at a BAD example:“Does everyone have their pencil?” Here, their is incorrect. Since “everyone” is singular, you should use “his or her pencil.” It’s a bit irritating, I know, but that’s life.Now let’s look at a GOOD example!“Kelly and Chuck have their pencils.” In this case, we are talking about two people who possess pencils. As such, we use their. Notice in this example, and shows that we’re connecting two people (much like 1 + 1). If we had used “or,” we’d be talking about singular pronouns right now!Final ThoughtsAs much as many of us would LIKE a genderless, single pronoun, we currently don’t really have one. English is a hard thing to change and it usually takes quite a bit of time to change. Maybe someday, in the future, we’ll be lucky enough to have a singular pronoun that is genderless, but for the time being we don’t. Ask yourself when you’re writing if you’re discussing a singular or plural and you should be well on your way to gendered pronoun success. Good luck!It’s often important to use language which implicitly or explicitly includes both men and women, making no distinction between the genders. This can be tricky when it comes to pronouns. In English, a person's gender is explicit in the third person singular pronouns (i.e., he, she, his, hers, etc.). There are no personal pronouns that can refer to someone (as opposed to something) without identifying whether that person is male or female. So, what should you do in sentences such as these?If your child is thinking about a gap year, ? can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in ? findings.In the past, people tended to use the pronouns he, his,him, or himself in situations like this:If your child is thinking about a gap year, he can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in his findings.Today, this approach is seen as outdated and sexist. There are other options which allow you to arrive at a ‘gender-neutral’ solution, as follows:You can use the wording ‘he or she’, ‘his or her’, etc.:If your child is thinking about a gap year, he or she can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in hisor her findings.This can work well, as long as you don’t have to keep repeating ‘he or she’, ‘his or her’, etc. throughout a piece of writing.You can make the relevant noun plural, rewording the sentence as necessary:If your children are thinking about a gap year, they can get good advice from this website.Researchers have to be completely objective in their findings.This approach can be a good solution, but it won’t always be possible.You can use the plural pronouns ‘they’, ‘them’, ‘their’ etc., despite the fact that, technically, they are referring back to a singular noun:If your child is thinking about a gap year, they can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in their findings.Some people object to the use of plural pronouns in this type of situation on the grounds that it’s ungrammatical. In fact, the use of plural pronouns to refer back to a singular subject isn’t new: it represents a revival of a practice dating from the 16th century. It’s increasingly common in current English and is now widely accepted both in speech and in writing.Traditionally, in English, when you had to use a pronoun for a person whose sex was unknown because it had been previously referred to as a “child”, “doctor”, “researcher”, and similar, you would say “he”, “him”, “his”, or “himself”, depending on the context. For example:Take care of your child. His life depends on you.You should see a doctor. He will know what to do.Every researcher has asked himself at some point of his career whether his contribution to science was good enough.Although the pronouns were masculine, the child in the first example could have been a girl, and the doctor and the researcher could be women. However, this usage is now becoming outdated, as it is seen as stimulating gender inequality. There are several options to mitigate the issue. You can use “he or she” instead of “he”:Take care of your child. His or her life depends on you.You should see a doctor. He or she will know what to do.Every researcher has asked himself or herself at some point of his or her career whether his or her contribution to science was good enough.As you can see especially in the third sentence, this grammatical tool soon becomes clumsy if you use it too often. Another possibility is to reword the whole sentence using the corresponding plural nouns, but this doesn’t always work:Take care of your children. Their lives depend on you.You should see doctors. They will know what to do.All researchers have asked themselves at some point of their career whether their contribution to science was good enough.Finally, it is becoming increasingly widespread and regarded as completely grammatically correct to use a plural pronoun for a singular noun to refer to it in a gender-neutral way:Take care of your child. Their life depends on you.You should see a doctor. They will know what to do.Every researcher has asked themselves at some point of their career whether their contribution to science was good enough.To me, personally, such sentences sound odd because they break the most elementary grammatical rules I have been taught in school. However, there seems to be an inevitable trend for this usage to replace gender-neutral “he, his, him” in English. Note that some authors went as far as to always use a feminine pronoun, for exampleEvery researcher has asked herself at some point of her career whether her contribution to science was good enough.Please, don’t do that. It is unnecessary and confusing, unless it is clear from the context that you mean only female researchers.Ask a teacher what he or she did this summer and he or she (or should I say they) will tell you that a good deal of time is spent prepping for the next school year. Educators will also tell you that they spent the summer analyzing their prior year’s performance, what went well and what didn’t.Steve Gardiner, who’s been teaching high school English in Montana for the past 38 years, says when it comes to grading English essays he’s ready to make a change that will lessen the workload on his red pen — and yes, it involves grammar.As a high school English teacher, I have been crossing out the singular use of the word ‘they’ for many years. I have burned up hundreds of red pens, and hours of time, correcting this grammatical usage based on a traditional gender binary of he and she. It’s time to move on.Although there is historical precedent, writers like Shakespeare and Chaucer and many others who used a singular “they,” most language experts throughout the 20th century saw this usage as an error. Language evolves over time and often social changes bring about modifications in word use. The issue of the missing singular gender-neutral pronoun is one of those situations.That’s why I cheered when the American Dialect Society met in Washington, D.C., recently and voted to make the word ‘they’ acceptable and correct when used as a gender-neutral singular pronoun. The change comes during a time of unprecedented discussion about gender identity issues.For example, “Every student should do the best they can.”That statement, while true, is incorrect, at least in sense of recent grammatical usage. It should bother us when we hear it, but it doesn’t. That’s because it has become so commonplace that related sentences featuring the daily usage, even for media commentators and many other educated speakers.As a high school English teacher, I have been crossing out the singular use of the word “they” for many years.In the example above, the correct version would read, “Every student should do the best he can,” or “Every student should do the best she can.” The subject student is singular and the pronoun they is plural, so we need to use either he or she to achieve noun-pronoun agreement.Three or four decades ago, it wasn’t much of a problem. We used the pronoun ‘he’ because the masculine form was dominant. Then we lived the years of seeking political correctness and gender equity, and the ‘he’ became more often ‘he or she’ or ‘he/she’ until we realized that reading paragraph after paragraph of he/slash/she quickly became tedious.If we wanted to remain gender-neutral, we needed to avoid ‘he’ or ‘she’ and the option most readily available to us was ‘they,’ which a is a gender-neutral pronoun, but plural. Yes, it would be possible to change the subject to plural and create the sentence, “All students should do the best they can,” and that would be correct, but it does not always say exactly what we are wanting to express.The problem, then, has been that the English language is missing a gender-neutral, singular pronoun.OK, we do have ‘it,’ which is a gender-neutral, singular pronoun. But ‘it’ is generally not considered correct for use in describing a human being. We reserve ‘it’ for things or animals, so ‘it’ does not quite fill the opening, either. Most of us would not care to say, “Every student should do the best it can.” I doubt that sentence sounds correct to very many people.We, as a society, made progress on the gender equity issue, we created a consciousness, an awareness, but we never assigned a word to let us take care of the problem grammatically.To create a singular gender-neutral pronoun, we could create a new word. Several have been suggested over the years, but none have made it into mainstream language usage.Another option is to say that since most people don’t hear the singular-plural agreement problem now, perhaps the application of the usage rule has changed and the word ‘they’ is now both singular and plural, in which case the original sentence earlier in this article is now correct.Having fought this battle with students for more than three decades, I am ready to admit defeat. Every student is going to write what they want. Every broadcaster is going to say what they want. There, I even wrote it myself, and most readers probably did not notice.The use of the singular ‘they’ simply does not seem like a mistake anymore. Now that the American Dialect Society has voted that it is not an error, I can save red ink and time, if only I can refrain myself from marking it. I am willing to try.For sentences like:If a student receives a perfect score, he or she/they will get a star.Since english doesn't have a third person gender neutral singular pronoun, I find it easier to use 'they' despite it being plural because using 'he or she' just sounds clumsy. What about you? Would you use 'he or she' or 'they' in sentences such as the one above?Most people prefer to be called “he” or “she”. But others, like Kelsey, do not: they want to be referred to by gender-neutral pronouns like “they”. Should you defer to Kelsey’s preferences? Many people think no. Some, like University of Toronto professor Jordan Peterson, have recently garnered celebrity status by taking a stance against gender-neutral pronouns: “I don’t recognize another person’s right to determine what pronouns I use to address them,” Peterson has said. His view is common among social conservatives.We think people should not use gender-specific pronouns for genderqueer people – people that do not identify as men or as women. We can start here: why should we use some words, rather than others, to refer to people?A common answer among the left is because we should respect people’s preferences. If you’re talking about Kelsey, you should use whatever pronouns Kelsey prefers, and Kelsey prefers “they”.Don't call me baby: the birth of the gender-neutral ‘theyby’Many on the right believe this is dogmatic. After all, many people prefer not to use “they” for Kelsey. Whose preferences matter more? From conservatives’ perspective, liberals just assume that Kelsey’s preferences matter more than theirs, and do so in the service of a political agenda.Is that assumption misguided? Consider an analogy. As a Muslim civil rights leader, Muhammad Ali rejected the name he was given at birth (Cassius Clay) because it represented a Christian identity that he rejected. He instead chose the name Ali. But others preferred to use Clay. Whose preferences matter more? We think the answer is clear. Ali’s identity is what’s at issue, so his preferences matter more.Why should we use some words, rather than others, to refer to people?But maybe you think there is more to say about why conservatives’ preferences matter. Many on the far right rally around the mantra “There are only two genders!”. They apparently believe that calling Kelsey “they” would affirm that Kelsey is not a man or a woman – an idea they flatly reject. Peterson makes this point in exaggerated fashion, refusing to be an “ideological puppet”, or a “mouthpiece of some murderous ideology”.Here the debate typically turns to whether it is right that there are only two genders. But even if we granted this point, the argument fails. Perhaps people should not be “bullied” into affirming identities that they reject. But this does not give anyone the right to deny those identities.This point is important because of something the usual rhetoric around pronouns obscures: gender-neutral pronouns are gender-neutral. “They” does not communicate that Kelsey is genderqueer in the way that “he” would communicate that Kelsey is a man or “she” would communicate that Kelsey is a woman. “They” refrains from ascribing a particular gender to Kelsey. This is why “they” is often used in colloquial English as a singular gender-neutral pronoun for people who probably aren’t genderqueer. (“Who is at the door?” “Dunno – go see what they want.”) “They” is often used this way, and has been used this way since the Shakespearean era. It’s nothing new. (Note that even Peterson uses singular “they” in an earlier quote.)Conservatives think they should not be forced to affirm that Kelsey is non-binary. But “they” does not affirm that Kelsey is any particular gender; it just avoids saying anything about Kelsey’s gender. As long as Kelsey should not be ascribed a gender they reject, we should not use “he” or “she” for Kelsey. We can all respect Kelsey without anyone being “bullied” into being a mouthpiece for any ideology.To our mind, everything else in this debate is a distraction. The far right defends their devotion to “he” and “she” by appealing to freedom of speech. But freedom of speech at most gives us “a right to do wrong”. Arguably, freedom of speech may give you a legal right to use racial slurs. But it doesn’t make it right to use racial slurs. Exercising a right to do wrong is still a way of doing something wrong. The same goes for using “he” or “she” for those who prefer otherwise: even if freedom of speech gives you a legal right to do so, it is still wrong.Appeals to grammaticality are similar. Many opposed to gender-neutral pronouns claim that singular use of “they” is “non-standard” English; the National Review decries “stupid people” engaged in an “asinine effort” to “de-pluralize ‘they’”. The sentence “They are my good friend” may strike you as ungrammatical. But notice that we say things like “You are my good friend” with ease. Using “they” as a singular or plural third-person pronoun is no different from how we already use “you” as a singular or plural second-person pronoun.More importantly, just as we recognize the distinction between morality and law, we should recognize a distinction between morality and grammar. Doing what is morally right sometimes requires challenging legal rules. Why should grammatical rules be different?We should focus on what matters: whether and why we should (not) use particular pronouns. It is wrong to use pronouns that deny someone’s identity. This is enough to see why we should use gender-neutral pronouns for non-binary people. In fact, once we see the virtues of using a gender-neutral pronoun like “they” for some people, maybe we should just use “they” for everyone.Big changes are afoot! APA endorses the use of “they” as a singular third-person pronoun in the seventh edition of the Publication Manual of the American Psychological Association. This means it is officially good practice in scholarly writing to use the singular “they.”This blog post provides insight into how this change came about and provides a forum for questions and feedback.What is the singular “they”?The singular “they” is a generic third-person pronoun used in English. It’s not the only third-person singular pronoun—other third-person singular pronouns are “she” and “he” as well as less common options such as “ze” or “hen.”Although the term singular “they” may be unfamiliar, you’ve probably heard and used the singular “they” in conversation throughout your life. Here is an example:A person should enjoy their vacation.The noun in this sentence is “person,” and the pronoun is “their.”Before the seventh edition, people might have written the aforementioned sentence like this in a scholarly paper:A person should enjoy his or her vacation.However, this second sentence presumes that a person uses either the pronoun “he” or the pronoun “she,” which is not necessarily the case. For example, some people use other pronouns, including “they,” “zir,” “ze,” “xe,” “hir,” “per,” “ve,” “ey,” and “hen.”Why use the singular “they”?When readers see a gendered pronoun, they make assumptions about the gender of the person being described (Gastil, 1990; Moulton et al., 1978). APA advocates for the singular “they” because it is inclusive of all people and helps writers avoid making assumptions about gender.When should I use the singular “they”?Writers should use the singular “they” in two main cases: (a) when referring to a generic person whose gender is unknown or irrelevant to the context and (b) when referring to a specific, known person who uses “they” as their pronoun.When referring to a generic person whose gender is unknown or irrelevant to the context, use the singular “they” as the pronoun. For example, if you use nouns like “person,” “individual,” or “everyone” or phrases like “every teacher” or “each nurse” in a sentence, use the appropriate form of the pronoun “they” as needed.Each student submitted their art portfolio to the committee.notEach student submitted his or her art portfolio to the committee.If you are writing about a specific, known person, always use that person’s pronouns. The person’s pronouns might be “she/her,” “they/them,” “he/him,” or something else—just ask to find out! It is also good practice for an individual to volunteer what pronouns they use so that others do not have to ask.If a person uses “she” or “he,” do not use “they” instead. Likewise, if a person uses “they,” do not switch to “he” or “she.” Use the pronouns the person uses.Kai is a nonbinary person. They attend university in their home state of Vermont and are majoring in chemistry. Kai’s friend River is a transgender woman. She attends the same university and is majoring in physics.What verbs do I use with the singular “they”?When “they” is the subject of a sentence, “they” takes a plural verb regardless of whether “they” is meant to be singular or plural. For example, write “they are,” not “they is.” The singular “they” works similarly to the singular “you”—even though “you” may refer to one person or multiple people, in a scholarly paper you should write “you are,” not “you is.” However, if the noun in one sentence is a word like “individual” or a person’s name, use a singular verb.Every individual is unique. They are a combination of strengths and weaknesses.notEvery individual is unique. They is a combination of strengths and weaknesses.Every individual is unique. She or he is a combination of strengths and weaknesses.Read more about plural verb forms for the singular “they” from the folks at Merriam-Webster.What is a generic person, anyway?Some people write about a generic person but give that generic person gendered qualities. For example, someone might write about “Jane Doe” and intend that Jane be a woman who uses “she/her” pronouns. In that case, it would be acceptable to use the pronoun “she” to refer to Jane because Jane is meant to be a generic woman who uses “she/her” pronouns, not a generic person who might use any pronouns.Use the singular “they” when the generic person is truly generic—devoid of gendered qualities. When describing generic people, it is easiest to avoid names (or to pick names without an obvious gender association) to avoid this confusion.What if I don’t like the singular “they”—do I have to use it?If you are writing about a person who uses “they” as their pronoun, then yes, you have to use it. Respectful and inclusive language is important. And it’s part of APA Style.If you are writing about a generic person, you should use the singular “they” if your sentence includes a pronoun. However, there are many ways to write grammatical and inclusive sentences. For example, you can rewrite a sentence in the plural to use plural pronouns, or you can rewrite a sentence so that it does not use pronouns at all.Here are some examples:People should enjoy their vacations.A person should enjoy vacations.A vacation should be enjoyable.These sentences are just as grammatical and inclusive as “A person should enjoy their vacation.”Where did the change come from?Experts in sexual orientation and gender diversity crafted APA’s bias-free language guidelines for writing about gender, including the guidance on singular “they.”You can read the bias-free language guidelines in full on the APA Style website. These guidelines cover not only how to write about gender but also age, disability, participation in research, racial and ethnic identity, sexual orientation, socioeconomic status, and intersectionality.APA is also not alone in the singular “they” movement. Although usage of the singular “they” was once discouraged in academic writing, many advocacy groups and publishers have accepted and endorsed it, including Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary.

My boss gave me an awesome article about pronouns and how English does not have a gender-neutral singular pronoun. It’s been a problem that has annoyed grammar-junkies everywhere. In typical conversation, these things don’t matter–and we’ll use the plural “they” as a gender neutral singular noun. In writing, this becomes problematic. You can’t use a plural pronoun to replace a singular noun. But then again, you also don’t want to omit a gender. So what do we do? How do we know what to use?Why You Need These WordsIn an academic paper, you do not want to use the first person point of view or second person point of view (unless you are given permission to do so). This omits words like “I, me, we, our”; which are first person; and “you, your”; which are second person. That leaves us with third person. There is a plethora of third person words, such as “someone,” “everyone,” “everybody,” “one,” “a person,” “the reader,” and so on. There are also plural words, such as “people,” “the audience,” and “they.” There are also the gender specific words “he” and “she,” and then we also have the word, “it.”ItLet’s begin with the last example, “it.” It is a pronoun for singular objects–not people. It would be an insult if you called a person “it.” It would be as if that person doesn’t have the qualities that give him or her the ability to be a human. For example, you would use it for a desk. “The desk was very old and it wobbled a lot.” In English, most (if not all) objects are genderless. In some languages, like Spanish, objects have genders–but in English we have the singular, genderless, it.He/She and His/HerThese are also singular pronouns. As I’m sure you know, they are gender oriented pronouns. She and Her are feminine, and he and his are masculine. These are pronouns you use when referring to objects with gender (primarily people and animals). Yes, you may use gendered pronouns with animals–even birds and fish. If you can discern by color patterns or whatever else that an animal is male or female, you may use the gendered pronouns. Let’s look at some examples.“My cat loves to be brushed. She always purrs when she is brushed.” In this case, the she is referring to the cat, who is clearly a female if you look at the pronouns.“My friend went to buy a new computer since her old one died.” Notice in this case, her is possessive. The computer that “died” belonged to her.TheyLet’s get this straight–they encompasses a group of people, animals, etc. Since a group does not have a specific gender (even if the group is comprised entirely of one gender, the group ITSELF is genderless), they is considered a genderless pronoun. This goes for them and their as well. However, at the end of the day, it’s plural and is still generally unaccepted to use as a singular pronoun. Let’s look at a BAD example:“Does everyone have their pencil?” Here, their is incorrect. Since “everyone” is singular, you should use “his or her pencil.” It’s a bit irritating, I know, but that’s life.Now let’s look at a GOOD example!“Kelly and Chuck have their pencils.” In this case, we are talking about two people who possess pencils. As such, we use their. Notice in this example, and shows that we’re connecting two people (much like 1 + 1). If we had used “or,” we’d be talking about singular pronouns right now!Final ThoughtsAs much as many of us would LIKE a genderless, single pronoun, we currently don’t really have one. English is a hard thing to change and it usually takes quite a bit of time to change. Maybe someday, in the future, we’ll be lucky enough to have a singular pronoun that is genderless, but for the time being we don’t. Ask yourself when you’re writing if you’re discussing a singular or plural and you should be well on your way to gendered pronoun success. Good luck!It’s often important to use language which implicitly or explicitly includes both men and women, making no distinction between the genders. This can be tricky when it comes to pronouns. In English, a person's gender is explicit in the third person singular pronouns (i.e., he, she, his, hers, etc.). There are no personal pronouns that can refer to someone (as opposed to something) without identifying whether that person is male or female. So, what should you do in sentences such as these?If your child is thinking about a gap year, ? can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in ? findings.In the past, people tended to use the pronouns he, his,him, or himself in situations like this:If your child is thinking about a gap year, he can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in his findings.Today, this approach is seen as outdated and sexist. There are other options which allow you to arrive at a ‘gender-neutral’ solution, as follows:You can use the wording ‘he or she’, ‘his or her’, etc.:If your child is thinking about a gap year, he or she can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in hisor her findings.This can work well, as long as you don’t have to keep repeating ‘he or she’, ‘his or her’, etc. throughout a piece of writing.You can make the relevant noun plural, rewording the sentence as necessary:If your children are thinking about a gap year, they can get good advice from this website.Researchers have to be completely objective in their findings.This approach can be a good solution, but it won’t always be possible.You can use the plural pronouns ‘they’, ‘them’, ‘their’ etc., despite the fact that, technically, they are referring back to a singular noun:If your child is thinking about a gap year, they can get good advice from this website.A researcher has to be completely objective in their findings.Some people object to the use of plural pronouns in this type of situation on the grounds that it’s ungrammatical. In fact, the use of plural pronouns to refer back to a singular subject isn’t new: it represents a revival of a practice dating from the 16th century. It’s increasingly common in current English and is now widely accepted both in speech and in writing.Traditionally, in English, when you had to use a pronoun for a person whose sex was unknown because it had been previously referred to as a “child”, “doctor”, “researcher”, and similar, you would say “he”, “him”, “his”, or “himself”, depending on the context. For example:Take care of your child. His life depends on you.You should see a doctor. He will know what to do.Every researcher has asked himself at some point of his career whether his contribution to science was good enough.Although the pronouns were masculine, the child in the first example could have been a girl, and the doctor and the researcher could be women. However, this usage is now becoming outdated, as it is seen as stimulating gender inequality. There are several options to mitigate the issue. You can use “he or she” instead of “he”:Take care of your child. His or her life depends on you.You should see a doctor. He or she will know what to do.Every researcher has asked himself or herself at some point of his or her career whether his or her contribution to science was good enough.As you can see especially in the third sentence, this grammatical tool soon becomes clumsy if you use it too often. Another possibility is to reword the whole sentence using the corresponding plural nouns, but this doesn’t always work:Take care of your children. Their lives depend on you.You should see doctors. They will know what to do.All researchers have asked themselves at some point of their career whether their contribution to science was good enough.Finally, it is becoming increasingly widespread and regarded as completely grammatically correct to use a plural pronoun for a singular noun to refer to it in a gender-neutral way:Take care of your child. Their life depends on you.You should see a doctor. They will know what to do.Every researcher has asked themselves at some point of their career whether their contribution to science was good enough.To me, personally, such sentences sound odd because they break the most elementary grammatical rules I have been taught in school. However, there seems to be an inevitable trend for this usage to replace gender-neutral “he, his, him” in English. Note that some authors went as far as to always use a feminine pronoun, for exampleEvery researcher has asked herself at some point of her career whether her contribution to science was good enough.Please, don’t do that. It is unnecessary and confusing, unless it is clear from the context that you mean only female researchers.Ask a teacher what he or she did this summer and he or she (or should I say they) will tell you that a good deal of time is spent prepping for the next school year. Educators will also tell you that they spent the summer analyzing their prior year’s performance, what went well and what didn’t.Steve Gardiner, who’s been teaching high school English in Montana for the past 38 years, says when it comes to grading English essays he’s ready to make a change that will lessen the workload on his red pen — and yes, it involves grammar.As a high school English teacher, I have been crossing out the singular use of the word ‘they’ for many years. I have burned up hundreds of red pens, and hours of time, correcting this grammatical usage based on a traditional gender binary of he and she. It’s time to move on.Although there is historical precedent, writers like Shakespeare and Chaucer and many others who used a singular “they,” most language experts throughout the 20th century saw this usage as an error. Language evolves over time and often social changes bring about modifications in word use. The issue of the missing singular gender-neutral pronoun is one of those situations.That’s why I cheered when the American Dialect Society met in Washington, D.C., recently and voted to make the word ‘they’ acceptable and correct when used as a gender-neutral singular pronoun. The change comes during a time of unprecedented discussion about gender identity issues.For example, “Every student should do the best they can.”That statement, while true, is incorrect, at least in sense of recent grammatical usage. It should bother us when we hear it, but it doesn’t. That’s because it has become so commonplace that related sentences featuring the daily usage, even for media commentators and many other educated speakers.As a high school English teacher, I have been crossing out the singular use of the word “they” for many years.In the example above, the correct version would read, “Every student should do the best he can,” or “Every student should do the best she can.” The subject student is singular and the pronoun they is plural, so we need to use either he or she to achieve noun-pronoun agreement.Three or four decades ago, it wasn’t much of a problem. We used the pronoun ‘he’ because the masculine form was dominant. Then we lived the years of seeking political correctness and gender equity, and the ‘he’ became more often ‘he or she’ or ‘he/she’ until we realized that reading paragraph after paragraph of he/slash/she quickly became tedious.READ MORE: The complications of ID for nonbinary peopleIf we wanted to remain gender-neutral, we needed to avoid ‘he’ or ‘she’ and the option most readily available to us was ‘they,’ which a is a gender-neutral pronoun, but plural. Yes, it would be possible to change the subject to plural and create the sentence, “All students should do the best they can,” and that would be correct, but it does not always say exactly what we are wanting to express.The problem, then, has been that the English language is missing a gender-neutral, singular pronoun.OK, we do have ‘it,’ which is a gender-neutral, singular pronoun. But ‘it’ is generally not considered correct for use in describing a human being. We reserve ‘it’ for things or animals, so ‘it’ does not quite fill the opening, either. Most of us would not care to say, “Every student should do the best it can.” I doubt that sentence sounds correct to very many people.We, as a society, made progress on the gender equity issue, we created a consciousness, an awareness, but we never assigned a word to let us take care of the problem grammatically.To create a singular gender-neutral pronoun, we could create a new word. Several have been suggested over the years, but none have made it into mainstream language usage.Another option is to say that since most people don’t hear the singular-plural agreement problem now, perhaps the application of the usage rule has changed and the word ‘they’ is now both singular and plural, in which case the original sentence earlier in this article is now correct.Having fought this battle with students for more than three decades, I am ready to admit defeat. Every student is going to write what they want. Every broadcaster is going to say what they want. There, I even wrote it myself, and most readers probably did not notice.The use of the singular ‘they’ simply does not seem like a mistake anymore. Now that the American Dialect Society has voted that it is not an error, I can save red ink and time, if only I can refrain myself from marking it. I am willing to try.For sentences like:If a student receives a perfect score, he or she/they will get a star.Since english doesn't have a third person gender neutral singular pronoun, I find it easier to use 'they' despite it being plural because using 'he or she' just sounds clumsy. What about you? Would you use 'he or she' or 'they' in sentences such as the one above?Most people prefer to be called “he” or “she”. But others, like Kelsey, do not: they want to be referred to by gender-neutral pronouns like “they”. Should you defer to Kelsey’s preferences? Many people think no. Some, like University of Toronto professor Jordan Peterson, have recently garnered celebrity status by taking a stance against gender-neutral pronouns: “I don’t recognize another person’s right to determine what pronouns I use to address them,” Peterson has said. His view is common among social conservatives.We think people should not use gender-specific pronouns for genderqueer people – people that do not identify as men or as women. We can start here: why should we use some words, rather than others, to refer to people?A common answer among the left is because we should respect people’s preferences. If you’re talking about Kelsey, you should use whatever pronouns Kelsey prefers, and Kelsey prefers “they”.Don't call me baby: the birth of the gender-neutral ‘theyby’Many on the right believe this is dogmatic. After all, many people prefer not to use “they” for Kelsey. Whose preferences matter more? From conservatives’ perspective, liberals just assume that Kelsey’s preferences matter more than theirs, and do so in the service of a political agenda.Is that assumption misguided? Consider an analogy. As a Muslim civil rights leader, Muhammad Ali rejected the name he was given at birth (Cassius Clay) because it represented a Christian identity that he rejected. He instead chose the name Ali. But others preferred to use Clay. Whose preferences matter more? We think the answer is clear. Ali’s identity is what’s at issue, so his preferences matter more.Why should we use some words, rather than others, to refer to people?But maybe you think there is more to say about why conservatives’ preferences matter. Many on the far right rally around the mantra “There are only two genders!”. They apparently believe that calling Kelsey “they” would affirm that Kelsey is not a man or a woman – an idea they flatly reject. Peterson makes this point in exaggerated fashion, refusing to be an “ideological puppet”, or a “mouthpiece of some murderous ideology”.Here the debate typically turns to whether it is right that there are only two genders. But even if we granted this point, the argument fails. Perhaps people should not be “bullied” into affirming identities that they reject. But this does not give anyone the right to deny those identities.This point is important because of something the usual rhetoric around pronouns obscures: gender-neutral pronouns are gender-neutral. “They” does not communicate that Kelsey is genderqueer in the way that “he” would communicate that Kelsey is a man or “she” would communicate that Kelsey is a woman. “They” refrains from ascribing a particular gender to Kelsey. This is why “they” is often used in colloquial English as a singular gender-neutral pronoun for people who probably aren’t genderqueer. (“Who is at the door?” “Dunno – go see what they want.”) “They” is often used this way, and has been used this way since the Shakespearean era. It’s nothing new. (Note that even Peterson uses singular “they” in an earlier quote.)Conservatives think they should not be forced to affirm that Kelsey is non-binary. But “they” does not affirm that Kelsey is any particular gender; it just avoids saying anything about Kelsey’s gender. As long as Kelsey should not be ascribed a gender they reject, we should not use “he” or “she” for Kelsey. We can all respect Kelsey without anyone being “bullied” into being a mouthpiece for any ideology.To our mind, everything else in this debate is a distraction. The far right defends their devotion to “he” and “she” by appealing to freedom of speech. But freedom of speech at most gives us “a right to do wrong”. Arguably, freedom of speech may give you a legal right to use racial slurs. But it doesn’t make it right to use racial slurs. Exercising a right to do wrong is still a way of doing something wrong. The same goes for using “he” or “she” for those who prefer otherwise: even if freedom of speech gives you a legal right to do so, it is still wrong.Appeals to grammaticality are similar. Many opposed to gender-neutral pronouns claim that singular use of “they” is “non-standard” English; the National Review decries “stupid people” engaged in an “asinine effort” to “de-pluralize ‘they’”. The sentence “They are my good friend” may strike you as ungrammatical. But notice that we say things like “You are my good friend” with ease. Using “they” as a singular or plural third-person pronoun is no different from how we already use “you” as a singular or plural second-person pronoun.More importantly, just as we recognize the distinction between morality and law, we should recognize a distinction between morality and grammar. Doing what is morally right sometimes requires challenging legal rules. Why should grammatical rules be different?We should focus on what matters: whether and why we should (not) use particular pronouns. It is wrong to use pronouns that deny someone’s identity. This is enough to see why we should use gender-neutral pronouns for non-binary people. In fact, once we see the virtues of using a gender-neutral pronoun like “they” for some people, maybe we should just use “they” for everyone.Big changes are afoot! APA endorses the use of “they” as a singular third-person pronoun in the seventh edition of the Publication Manual of the American Psychological Association. This means it is officially good practice in scholarly writing to use the singular “they.”This blog post provides insight into how this change came about and provides a forum for questions and feedback.What is the singular “they”?The singular “they” is a generic third-person pronoun used in English. It’s not the only third-person singular pronoun—other third-person singular pronouns are “she” and “he” as well as less common options such as “ze” or “hen.”Although the term singular “they” may be unfamiliar, you’ve probably heard and used the singular “they” in conversation throughout your life. Here is an example:A person should enjoy their vacation.The noun in this sentence is “person,” and the pronoun is “their.”Before the seventh edition, people might have written the aforementioned sentence like this in a scholarly paper:A person should enjoy his or her vacation.However, this second sentence presumes that a person uses either the pronoun “he” or the pronoun “she,” which is not necessarily the case. For example, some people use other pronouns, including “they,” “zir,” “ze,” “xe,” “hir,” “per,” “ve,” “ey,” and “hen.”Why use the singular “they”?When readers see a gendered pronoun, they make assumptions about the gender of the person being described (Gastil, 1990; Moulton et al., 1978). APA advocates for the singular “they” because it is inclusive of all people and helps writers avoid making assumptions about gender.When should I use the singular “they”?Writers should use the singular “they” in two main cases: (a) when referring to a generic person whose gender is unknown or irrelevant to the context and (b) when referring to a specific, known person who uses “they” as their pronoun.When referring to a generic person whose gender is unknown or irrelevant to the context, use the singular “they” as the pronoun. For example, if you use nouns like “person,” “individual,” or “everyone” or phrases like “every teacher” or “each nurse” in a sentence, use the appropriate form of the pronoun “they” as needed.Each student submitted their art portfolio to the committee.notEach student submitted his or her art portfolio to the committee.If you are writing about a specific, known person, always use that person’s pronouns. The person’s pronouns might be “she/her,” “they/them,” “he/him,” or something else—just ask to find out! It is also good practice for an individual to volunteer what pronouns they use so that others do not have to ask.If a person uses “she” or “he,” do not use “they” instead. Likewise, if a person uses “they,” do not switch to “he” or “she.” Use the pronouns the person uses.Kai is a nonbinary person. They attend university in their home state of Vermont and are majoring in chemistry. Kai’s friend River is a transgender woman. She attends the same university and is majoring in physics.What verbs do I use with the singular “they”?When “they” is the subject of a sentence, “they” takes a plural verb regardless of whether “they” is meant to be singular or plural. For example, write “they are,” not “they is.” The singular “they” works similarly to the singular “you”—even though “you” may refer to one person or multiple people, in a scholarly paper you should write “you are,” not “you is.” However, if the noun in one sentence is a word like “individual” or a person’s name, use a singular verb.Every individual is unique. They are a combination of strengths and weaknesses.notEvery individual is unique. They is a combination of strengths and weaknesses.Every individual is unique. She or he is a combination of strengths and weaknesses.Read more about plural verb forms for the singular “they” from the folks at Merriam-Webster.What is a generic person, anyway?Some people write about a generic person but give that generic person gendered qualities. For example, someone might write about “Jane Doe” and intend that Jane be a woman who uses “she/her” pronouns. In that case, it would be acceptable to use the pronoun “she” to refer to Jane because Jane is meant to be a generic woman who uses “she/her” pronouns, not a generic person who might use any pronouns.Use the singular “they” when the generic person is truly generic—devoid of gendered qualities. When describing generic people, it is easiest to avoid names (or to pick names without an obvious gender association) to avoid this confusion.What if I don’t like the singular “they”—do I have to use it?If you are writing about a person who uses “they” as their pronoun, then yes, you have to use it. Respectful and inclusive language is important. And it’s part of APA Style.If you are writing about a generic person, you should use the singular “they” if your sentence includes a pronoun. However, there are many ways to write grammatical and inclusive sentences. For example, you can rewrite a sentence in the plural to use plural pronouns, or you can rewrite a sentence so that it does not use pronouns at all.Here are some examples:People should enjoy their vacations.A person should enjoy vacations.A vacation should be enjoyable.These sentences are just as grammatical and inclusive as “A person should enjoy their vacation.”Where did the change come from?Experts in sexual orientation and gender diversity crafted APA’s bias-free language guidelines for writing about gender, including the guidance on singular “they.”You can read the bias-free language guidelines in full on the APA Style website. These guidelines cover not only how to write about gender but also age, disability, participation in research, racial and ethnic identity, sexual orientation, socioeconomic status, and intersectionality.APA is also not alone in the singular “they” movement. Although usage of the singular “they” was once discouraged in academic writing, many advocacy groups and publishers have accepted and endorsed it, including Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary.