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Table of Contents1. Introduction 32. Need Analysis 43. Action Plan and Implementation 54. Methodology 5a) Surveys 6b) Interviews 6c) Observation 65. Post Test Findings 66. Analysis and Discussion 7Action Plan 1: Examining a Child’s Interest and Focusing on their Learning Styles 7Action Plan 2: Examining a Child’s Inter Focusing on their Learning Styles 997. Conclusion 9Tabulation of Results for K2 10Graph 108. Reflections 11Recommendations 129. References 1310. Appendices 15Teachers’ Interview Sample Questions 15Children’s Observation Checklist Table Sample 16Parent’s Survey Sample 19IntroductionYoung children often struggle with crucial motor skills such as grasping pencils and utensils, moving items with their fingertips and using common tools such as scissors. In adopting these exceptional motor skills, kids develop them at different rates (Bruni, 2006). If a child has difficulty in such crucial skills, they may need extra assistance to promote facilitation of such skills. Therefore, it is essential to introduce, show, teach them and provide as many opportunities for practice during their early childhood. When a child develops these abilities, they may achieve independence at an early stage which will save parents and teachers’ time from close supervision.Children possessing the gross and motor skills are adventurous, and they always explore the environment which progresses the cognitive abilities. The distinction between fine and gross motor skills lies in the number of muscles the two movements trigger in a kid. Exceptional motor skills entail the smaller muscles such as the wrist and hand while gross motor skills involve the larger muscles groups which include the arm and leg. Self-help skills help a teacher when teaching the kindergarten students to have minimal errands in observing the students. Bruni (2006) expounds further that avoidable accidents such as spillage and toileting can be evaded if the cultivation of motor skills starts at an early age with the support from kindergarten teachers and parents. According to a literature review from Ali, Clarke, & Mclachlan, (2017), the physical activity and motor skill proficiency of young children may be a vital predictor of physically active behaviors in their later life. Ruling out interventions in early childhood education could support their academic performance including physical skills and behaviors.Owing to the immense contribution of motor skills coordination, I developed a research question on how to plan activities that improve motor skills coordination in children. My primary focus is to enhance the self-help skills through specific activities which need the involvement of the three parties; parents, teachers, and students at the kindergarten 2 level. Teachers need to modify or adapt activities and select props or equipment that is appropriate for kindergarten age. Teachers will teach the kids and make them learn skills from simple to complex tasks and break down the instruction into smaller steps. I realized the lack of exercise in particular activities led to poor motor skills coordination. Hence, the original essence for this research is to develop an action plan for children which will, in turn, improve their motor skill coordination and reduce dependency on adults. The timeline of the action plan is to be completed before 5 August 2018 and the parents meet up event day is carried out on 24 July 2018, workshop date for teachers is set at 30 July 2018.2.0 Need AnalysisDuring the initial findings that were performed through surveys, interview, and observation. The data collected indicated that parents did not have adequate knowledge on how to support their kids in developing motor skills. They do not know the importance of their role and the general development of their kids. There was a lack of standard abilities and aptitude tests which teachers attributed to their inability to determine the progress of motor skills. Evaluation of the skills was a difficult task since there was no in-between, it is either the child knew how to perform the skill or not. From observation, other children performed better than the others who were still learning. With all the above fundamental flaws, there is a need for training and awareness else it will reduce the effectiveness of motor skill intervention.3.0 Action Plan and ImplementationPlan 1: Examining a Child’s Interest and Focusing on their Learning Styles with a parent’s event.The administrative department started calling all parents two days ago before the event to remind them. The central planner is in charge of the preparation and the overall event. The family room that is centrally placed should be the one to offer a place that is comfortable, where meetings can be held. On the other hand, the conference should be started with positive information about the kid’s development and progress. The parents' event is designed specifically to equip teachers to enhance their understanding of children with motor skills developmental issues and the strategies to work effectively with parents. To understand each child’s interest, some activities will be set up to discover the child’s abilities; parents will be able to explore and get their child to engage in a wide variety of dramatical activities. The parents are expected to engage in meaningful discussion during the 7-hour event, while on the other hand making sure that they set up various activities that are required in the process. Additionally, for effective communication, the parents should come up with ways that would enable them to work with the teachers effectively.The event content covers:1. Comprehending the development issues of the motor skills and their causes.2. Understanding the challenges faced by parents with children having developmental issues when it comes to the motor skills.3. Strategies that could be used in engaging the parents effectively, for them to learn how they could support their children’s motor skills development. This may include the activities conducted at home, between the child and the parent.In the process of motor skills development and learning, it is critical to note that some kids would depend on their other children to learn effectively. It is also vital to indicate that at least every child has the primary sensory learning modality, which is quite significant in the process of learning new skills. Therefore, this means that the kids may entirely depend on the visual sense, in order to acquire information, and most importantly, to interpret the world accordingly. Other children may also do the same without necessarily learning from their colleagues. Such categories of kids are likely to make use of their feeling of sense, auditory, or the physical abilities, in order to learn most of the required things while growing.Some of the characters that build out of such a process include the personality, the learning styles, and temperance. Most of these characters are to be noticed at the point when the child is at the continuum’s extreme. Therefore, when this is the case, the teaching strategies should be adjusted accordingly, to make the children learn appropriately. Majority of the kids are also said to be having at least one specific interest, whereby some are fascinated by the trucks, certain sports, machines, and others by particular activities, which they undertook in kindergarten. Once the teacher has identified one of the interests, he/she should ensure that they incorporate the activities in such a way that would enable the kid to learn effectively. Sometimes children express and pursue their interests only at home, so it is necessary to ask parents during the event.Plan 2: Parents and Teachers Partnership with a workshopThis approach aims to provide the preschool educators to build fundamental motor skills in young children that include loco-motor, object control, and stability skills. In this 8-hour hands-on practical workshop, it offers the teachers fun activities throughout the session to integrate motor skills development and the other learning areas. Through hands-on activities, participants will get to identify strategies for successful execution of gross (fundamental) motor skills activities. Participants will plan games and activities that develop fundamental motor skills in young children.At the end of the workshop, participants will be able to:• Identify the importance of (fundamental) motor skills in young children• Ages & stages: how children develop motor skills• To plan integrated activities to help young children develop motor skills• Effectively and efficiently manage a classroom during lesson using various appropriate teaching strategies to support gross motor skills development in young children• To recognize and identify at least one movement difficulty in skill executionLed by a physical therapist, the workshop would be quite crucial as it would give the teachers a more in-depth and new perspective on the kid’s motor skills development. This can also be described as an informative and practical session, which is designed in a way that would help boost the teacher’s awareness of the various stages that are involved in the motor skills development. Through this move, the teachers would be able to analyse and address the lags in each person’s development.Through the application of an appropriate set of strategies, information, and various extension activities, it would easy on the teachers’ side to ensure that the kids’ motor skills development needs have been addressed. Teachers should also realize when to monitor and when to refer to a visit that appears more professional specifically. Additionally, the symptoms of the Motor Coordination Disorder (MCD) should be carried by the teachers. By identifying, planning and integrating the entire needs of the students, the teachers are likely to become more confident.Post FindingsTo compare the effectiveness and results before and after action plan, the same methodologies were utilized during the process for data collection:a. SurveysData collected was from the kid’s parents. This method of data collection was in writing form, and there was no contact between the researcher and parent. All parents have indicated improvement motor skills of their children at home settings in the survey. Some of the skills that their children do not know how to do, they have acquired it now. The pamphlets, leaflets, and brochures act as a resource kit for the parents. The results of the survey are better than the previous one as most parents called in to the school for the feedback that the resource kit provided tips in addressing to the child’s learning needs. They understand their role to keep monitoring their child to the next milestone and is a reasonable response of the awareness of the parents.b. InterviewsThe participants were the teachers. The results collected were the average percentage based on the primary curriculum from the two sets of 8 questions. The teachers will be asked to name the potential barriers that can prevent the child from achieving after the workshop. The feedback received that partnership with parents’ aid in the motor skills development is very successful in the workshop. The teachers can better evaluate and have a right track of the children after inflicting the skills on them are divided into three phases. The Teacher’s response to highly confident with children in nurturing motor skills based on their new knowledge and skills gained from the workshop. The results collected from the interview is better before the event.c. ObservationThis method of data collection entailed children who were observed using the standard motor skills development checklist. Additional complex activities were set up to be examined in the study after the purchase of new equipment. Teachers managed to describe the behaviors they record accurately, without subjective interpretation or labelling. When teachers have observed that several children have difficulty using scissors, they have plan activities that use small muscles, such as fishing for objects with tongs or placing pegs in a board, then move to tear paper and, finally, to use the scissors. Teachers use many techniques to record and organize their observations. The first technique, in this case, is to ensure that one keeps a pad of paper and a pencil to put down the critical sets of information in the entire interaction. Later on, the short notes would be used in making a clear and coherent notebook, which could be stored in files for future reference. Some of the teachers are also likely to spend most of their time putting down particular observations and the impressions, which they made during the sessions.If all these information is put down into a diary, it will become advantageous for future reference. Another strategy that could be used correctly by the teacher is that of rotating the cards for different students. If such cards are rotated, this will make the teachers work easier as he/she would be able to assess every student in the class. On the other hand, the teachers could try and place some checklists on the walls of the classes, which would enable them to track the choices that the kids made during the day. By setting obstacle courses outside the classes, the teacher would be able to observe the children more appropriately, while using the developmental checklists. The checklists are essential as they would help individual kids to showcase their various capacities. The photographs and the tape recorders do offer long-lasting records of the children, which would help in the tracking process of how the children are developing.Teachers' observations, assessment data, and information provided by parents can be used to understand and plan for each child now.Post Findings AnalysisAfter the implementation of the action plan, 80% of the children in the study reported significant improvement in their motor skills coordination. From the graph above, it shows how the K2 students made a tremendous improvement in their abilities as time went forward. The children began to develop motor skills such as catching a ball after it had bounced. They also exhibited the ability to run around obstacles which they were unable to perform before the study. Besides, since during observation some students did not interact fully with others since they preferred solitude, the action plan enabled them to start doing things with others such as jumping in a row. Moreover, they were able to walk in a line and tiptoes which proved the action plan was successful.The kindergarten teachers became more involved in motor skills development in coordination with their parents. A collection of drawings, arts and attempted writings done by the children have been pasted on the walls. Teachers have since started to review the works with the children after attending the workshop. Most children enjoy reviewing work and getting praise from their teachers. It builds up their confidence and may even work harder to get noticed by the teacher. The classroom is filled with photographs of children doing activity in class, and it provides a visual picture of the children. Parents can look at the diversity of their child's work when teachers share the portfolios during the parent’s meeting. Teachers increased their time to build these crucial fine and motor skills which made the children more independent than before. After successful setting of a specific way of measuring the aptitudes and the abilities of children as aforementioned in the action plan, parents and teachers could track the progress of their children without any difficulties. The teacher noticed that majority of the children could button their shirt and learning to wear shoes themselves. Parents’ feedback that they have signed up further professional training course and seek advice from non-profit organization hotline found in the pamphlets.Analysis and DiscussionWhen comparing the baseline data findings and post action findings, a similar programme and activities are used in the intervention of study. Children examined during the play and study times; the programme is showed to have slight improvement with extra activities added to the new action plan. The results from this study provide evidence that the Primary Movement programme, similar to the motor skills improvement programme had a significant effect on improving the motor skills of the children. This research provides further evidence to support the use of the programme within the Early Years curriculum (Brown, 2010). While differences after the implementation, the parent’s reported improvement in the survey after participation in motor skills development. Instead of leaving a child to undertake a specific motor skill independently, the guardian should help the child (Marcon, 1999). When we watch someone acting, our brains may simulate the performance of the action we observe (Jeannerod, 1994). With the pamphlets, leaflets, and brochures were given out to parents to teach the kids at home. The repetition of practice and assistance of parents is the key to success.According to Mahoney, Perales, Wiggers & Herman (2006), the role of parents in early childhood learning are the people with the most significant opportunities to promote children's motor learning. Parents should be active participants in their children's motor intervention. When the first observation where most children were unable to do essential activities such as climbing the ladder and peddling a tricycle, most of them can achieve now. Previously the procedure is not divided into stages as a teacher has limited knowledge. Now, the children are divided into three stages where they will be grouped in cognitive stages, associative stage and autonomous stage have a better way for evaluation. This article covers the growing evidence that motor skill learning advances through stages, in which different storage mechanisms predominate. The acquisition phase is characterized by fast (within a session) and slow learning (between sessions). Evidence for stages in motor skill learning is provided by experiments using behavioural, electrophysiological, functional imaging, and cellular/molecular methods (Luft & Buitrago, 2005). After the teacher finished attending the workshop, they had a specific way of measuring the aptitudes and the abilities of children; they were able to identify and recognize correctly that children had motor skills difficulties.Additionally, after the workshop, the teachers should be able to highlight the areas, which he/she needs to be improved. Through such an action, it would be possible to make the necessary changes that are required. Further data analysis revealed that there was no significant correlation between years of previous work experience and specific knowledge. Studies expressed their belief that they would benefit from specific ongoing education and training (Anastasiadis, Kourtessis & Zachopoulou, 2017). According to the statistics collected, it can be concluded that when teachers and guardians put their efforts together in developing motor skills in children, the results are significant. As a product of their collaboration, children will have the confidence to undertake their activities independently (Ulrich, 2013). The communication between the teachers and parents was critical in ensuring that they were conscious to allow the children to develop these self-help skills. The action plan provides a guide for parents to ensure their role in promoting motor skills. The parents commenced giving tasks such as grooming and toileting to their kids as well as giving them time to finish up.The best thing about communication between the teachers and the parents is that it would bring about an effective way of handling the children. Through this action, children are more likely to develop the motor skills more appropriately, considering that the teachers and the parents to understand them fully. It should also be noted that apart from the schools, research has that most of the kid’s activities do rely on the parents. Out of this, the parents should be able to understand their children well, even before taking them and handing them over to the teachers.Gross Motor Development ChartAge GroupMilestoneBirth- 3 monthsWhile being moved, they hold firmlyLifts their heads up only when lying on the belly4-6 monthsSits with support, rolls from belly to back, starts to crawl gradually, and tries to stand while holding the parent’s hand.7-9 MonthsStarts to pull towards a proper sitting positionAttempts to walk while holding parents hands.Takes coordinated but small steps.10- 12 monthsBegins to stand aloneBends downwards in order to pick thingsStarts to walk alonePushes small obstacles out of their way.13-15 monthsMoves around even the large obstacles22-24 monthsBegins to squatTabulation of Results before and after for K2GraphEthical ConsiderationsThe parents have informed the objectives of the research which was to develop an action plan that promotes motor skills coordination in children. In addition to the objectives, the guardians were briefed on the expected duration of the study which could enable them to incorporate a specific time in the study. Bunker (1991) mentions that procedures in the study should be clearly outlined before the actual process. As the survey entailed data collection from their opinions, consent was first sought before any assessment. They were allowed the right to withhold or withdraw their opinions from the research in case they felt any uneasiness.Their parents legally approved the observations which involved children since they were below the legal age. All the participants in the study were given full anonymity, and the information collected away from the central point of discussion was to remain confidential (Grissmer et al., 2010). Moreover, the views offered by the parents were respected and not biased by the researcher’s perception. All the parents were handled in a fair and justified manner as well as the researcher collected their information truthfully with no alterations. Additionally, the participants were told how the study would benefit other people in the community.7. ConclusionConclusively, most of the kids who possess the gross and motor skills are said to be quite adventurous, and should, therefore, be given the opportunity to explore the environment. It is vital to state that by virtue of these children being given the opportunity to explore the environment, they would be able to acquire more skills, compared to those who are not offered the same opportunities. Teachers and parents have the responsibility of ensuring that the kids’ motor skills have developed exclusively. Self-help skills help a teacher when teaching the kindergarten students to have minimal errands in observing the students. It should also be noted that most of these strategies should be laid down when the child is at his/her tender age, with the maximum age being 2.ReflectionReflecting on this action research, I was able to investigate how motor skills coordination could be enhanced in kindergarten two children. The time needed to carry the research is a big challenge while struggling with work and family. Eventually, I managed to overcome by setting up a schedule with at least 2 hours every day to do the assignment. The actions of setting up the schedule were quite significant since it would bring about a better way of training the children.On the other hand, if proper research is carried out, it would be easier to come up with better techniques that would be used in ensuring the learning process is smooth. Through this action, it was possible to drive towards the goals that have been set. Learning the best approach when it comes to the motor skills development was quite advantageous as I believe that this would enable one to train the children adequately. On the other hand, the entire set of notes that were taken during the interaction were quite useful. If every step is taken as it had been indicated in the conference, it would be able to achieve the goals of training the children more appropriately. Additionally, I realized that since most of the children had different capacities, which they could operate under, it was vital for every teacher to focus on this before embarking on the training sessions.LimitationsAs the research is not based on the longitudinal study, the cross-sectional study cannot help to determine the cause and effect. The study used in the sample size is small, so we cannot use the same results to represent for a larger population. Thus it increases the risk of sampling error. The findings used is based on self-report data so, not all the information provided is 100% accurate. Some parents might even think that giving the correct information will admit their child is having problems. Another challenge emanated from the difficulty when it came to parents-teachers cooperating. Since a majority of parents would give excuses for how busy they were, it, therefore, became a difficult task trying to make the processes go through. Some of the parents did not trust that the process would enable their kids to achieve the motor skills significantly, therefore making the process quite tedious. Lastly, the biggest challenge came as a result of the young age of the children. Most of them could not comprehend what was being carried out at the time, therefore making the entire process to be challenging.Recommendations and ImprovementMy recommendations based on the research is that teachers should identify these K2 children’s needs in every academic year. The teachers should utilize observable prompts to facilitate better listening and sitting abilities as well as set specific activities to be carried out both at home and in schools. The teacher could also ensure those who are strong in one skill to partner with the ones who are weak in those skills which will reinforce their ability to learn the new skill. Besides, there should be close monitoring of the children’s activities and their progress. The exceptional motor skills which seem a little challenging to undertake should also be developed along with the gross motor skills. Hence, I would like to suggest action research which is explicitly based on exceptional motor skills to enable the children to attain full motor skills coordination. Half yearly home visits are also recommended because they give teachers some insight into family and culture.8.ReferencesAli, A., Pigou, D., Clarke, L., & Mclachlan, C. (2017). Literature Review on Motor Skill and Physical Activity in Preschool Children in New Zealand. Advances in Physical Education, 07(01).Anastasiadis, M., Kourtessis, T., & Zachopoulou, E., (2017). Educator’s ability to identify students with coordination disorders: A review of literature. Arab Journal of Nutrition and Exercise (AJNE), 2(3), 139.Barnett, L., Van Beurden, E., Morgan, P., Brooks, L., & Beard, J. (2008). Does childhood motor skill proficiency predict adolescent fitness?. Medicine+ Science in Sports+ Exercise, 40(12), 2137.Bruni, M. (2006). Fine Motor Skills for Children with Down syndrome: A Guide for Parents and Professionals (Topics in Down syndrome). Woodbine House.Bunker, L. K. (1991). The role of play and motor skill development in building children's self-confidence and self-esteem. The Elementary School Journal, 91(5), 467-471.Clark, J. E. (2007). On the problem of motor skill development. Journal of Physical Education, Recreation & Dance, 78(5), 39-44.Gabbard, C. P. (2016). Lifelong motor development. Lippincott Williams & Wilkins.Grissmer, D., Grimm, K. J., Aiyer, S. M., Murrah, W. M., & Steele, J. S. (2010). Fine motor skills and early comprehension of the world: two new school readiness indicators. Developmental psychology, 46(5), 1008.Luft, A. R., & Buitrago, M. M. (2005). Stages of Motor Skill Learning. Molecular Neurobiology, 32(3), 205-216.Marcon, R. A. (1999). Positive relationships between parent school involvement and public school inner-city preschoolers' development and academic performance. School psychology review, 28(3), 395.Mahoney, G., Perales, F., Wiggers, B., & Herman, B. B. (2006). Responsive Teaching: Early intervention for children with Down syndrome and other disabilities. Down Syndrome Research and Practice, 11(1), 18-28.Russell, D. J., Rosenbaum, P., Wright, M., & Avery, L. M. (2002). Gross motor function measure (GMFM-66 & GMFM-88) user's manual (Vol. 159). London: Mac Keith Press.Ulrich, D. A. (2013). The test of gross motor development-3 (TGMD-3): Administration, scoring, and international norms. Spor Bilimleri Dergisi, 24(2), 27-33.Appendix 1PARENTS SURVEY SAMPLEDear Parents,The use of the survey is to collect data from the parents will be crucial in ensuring that statistical data is collected about the motor skills development of their children. Thank You for your participation and support!Survey Questions1. What of the parents/guardians below are you?Single ParentFather Male GuardianMother Female Guardian2.Do you have good knowledge of the specific roles after the participation with the school on handling with regards to your child motor skills development?Yes or No3. Do you think your help has assisted your child for the improvement, which positively assists them to advance their motor skills?Highly HelpfulHelpfulDoes not offer any help4. Did you noticed any improvement areas about the development of your child's motor skills at home? Yes or No5. How confident are you to bring your child to the next milestone in supporting their motor skills development process?Highly ConfidentModerately confidentConfidentLowly Confident6. Do you view your roles in the child development of the motor skills as important after the workshop? Yes or No7. Do you keep a record of your child’s performance after each activities performed at home to keep track of their motor skills development?Yes or No8. Does the pamphlets, leaflets, and brochures help you understand and assist to train your child at home?Yes or NoTeachers’ Interview Sample Questions1. How engaged are you in K2 class motor skills activities after the training?Highly EngagedModerately EngagedEngagedNot Engaged2.Are you able to name the potential barriers that can prevent the child from achieving their potential after the training?________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________3.How confident are you to help the child reach to their full potential during the class?Highly ConfidentModerately confidentConfidentLowly Confident4. How does the partnership with parents aid in the child motor’s skills development.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________4.Does the center new curriculums, social climate, and the organizational structure with additional new equipment match the needs of the child? Yes or No5.What specific improvements have you seen the children develop which have shaped their motor skills development?________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________6. Do you have a good track of the motor skills development of the children after inflicting the skills to them are divided into three phases? Yes or No7. Do you understand the new specific ways of measuring the abilities and the aptitudes of the children to guide adapted education? Yes or No8. How do you use the knowledge and skills gained from the workshop to stimulate the child to learn and to work hard?____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________PamphletsDual Colored Laces Can Help Your Child Learn How To Tie Shoelaces!·Parents can try Bean bag games and activities at home with kids to develop gross motor skills.·Beanbags is easier to handle than a ball as they don’t roll away, It is less frustrating for the child with poor coordination skills.StepsGet your child to balance a bean bag on the head while walking along a balance beam, a length of rope, or along a line marked out on the ground.Increase the challenge by asking your child to keep the bean bag on their heads while:doing a heel-toe walkwalking around obstacleslowering the body to touch an object on the ground!Put a pile of beanbags at one side of the yard and a bucket at the other, and have your child hop, run, jump, crawl or skip to take the bean bag to the bucket – your child can either hold the beanbag, balance it on the head, or balance it on an outstretched arm or even a spoon!

How was your experience at Footsteps?

Written by Jacob Gluck:After weeks of anxiety and suspense, Boruch Schneider [not the real name] opened up his inbox on May 21, 2018 to find the dreaded expulsion letter he had been expecting, and yet had hoped to somehow, miraculously, avert. As an ex-haredi young adult, he had been a member of the Footsteps organization, a membership that entitled him to participate in its exclusive social events, meet with social workers for consultation and support, and receive tuition subsidies, among other benefits. Now, the rug had just been pulled from under his feet: he was officially barred from all organizational benefits, for creating “an inhospitable environment for members who identify as LGBTQ”. That was a violation of his membership agreement: to “ensure the safety and security of fellow Footsteps members”, to “respect diverse opinions”, to “adhere fully and immediately with staff requests and instructions”, and to “inform a staff person if there is conduct or actions by others present that cause me concern or discomfort”.Boruch has become the latest victim of draconian measures devised by the radical left in order to shield and coddle fragile young souls from the harshness of reality: In the wanton new world of trigger warnings, safe spaces, and micro-agressions, it didn’t matter that his offensive action was only verbal, it didn’t matter that it was merely “construed” as offensive (not deliberately intended to be so), it didn’t matter that the “safety and security” cited were mental and subjective. Under the new rules feelings were real, and their irritation was just as bad as a physical assault.Boruch has run afoul of politically correct conventions regarding gender, diversity and egalitarianism. In group conversations, he dared voice his brazen heterodox opinions, denying that women were being victimized everywhere, that men were aggressive and bad, and that not enough is being done to welcome transgenders and gays into the “diverse” Footsteps community, et al. When someone in the group once mentioned something about diversity, Boruch had snickered, making the speaker uncomfortable. The more Boruch was told to be gentle and polite, the more he was implored to withhold his uncouth views –the more he felt pushed against the wall, and the more he felt impelled to fight back and fend for himself.Boruch was messing with the holy cow of the new leftist cult: the belief, veneration, and sacralization of the ethereal nobility of all things feminine. When offered counseling and remediation, Boruch defiantly declined. For that his membership in the organization was revoked. He was a dangerous and insufferable heretic propagating heresy amidst the new leftist religion –reviled like Boruch Spinoza, and doomed to suffer his fate.Objectively speaking, Boruch’s repudiation of the new radical leftist views that have overtaken much of our society in the last four years, wasn’t of a different nature from the radical left’s objection to his views. It was simply a disagreement over values, not unlike any of the myriad of other political, social, and religious disagreements that have been going on in America for centuries and in Footsteps for a decade. In eras past, however, members of opposing teams relished debates and opportunities to joust on contemporary controversies, whether they were ultimately successful in convincing the other party or not. In the past no one ever sought to ban debate in a social club. This time, in our own era, it is different: there is an orthodoxy, and those who disagree had better keep it to themselves or leave. The orthodox position is the correct position, so it can not possibly offend anyone, whereas the heterodox position is erroneous, mean and hurtful. You had better shut up or leave the group. Diversity is welcome, sure, –so long as it is within the orthodox range of opinions.Boruch’s case stands out because he was determined not to back down. Dozens of other men who have once been frequent Footsteppers simply stopped attending or do so less frequently. In correspondence with HN they describe an environment for straight men as dangerous as a minefield, and as crooked as a dog’s hind leg. Men could be sex-teased by the opposite sex, but, if they then take the bait, the women were apt –nay encouraged– to rebuke or report them for “sexual harassment” for daring to flirt with them. Moreover, not just the purported victim, but anyone who witnesses conduct that is “hostile or harassing”, is enjoined to “contact Footsteps staff” who is then to launch an investigation; and by the new standards all “remarks or conduct having sexual innuendo” are by default hostile and harassing.They describe an environment where self-righteous posturing, virtue-signaling and vindictive protectiveness (a term coined by Jonathan Haidt) is rampant. Women, gays, and transgenders are feted and held in high esteem, while straight men are shamed, shunned, ignored, and accused of being aggressive and evil merely for their gender. Telling victimhood tales is applauded, but voicing even the slightest misgivings thereof is met with blank and awkward stares from others –not necessarily because they all disagree, but because they fear the repercussions of sympathizing with heterodox opinions that are at odd with the dominant culture. The few straight men who do decide to remain active in Footsteps quickly discover the new rules of the game: Always sympathize with all victimhood tales by women, and never argue with such tales or attempt to “rationalize” objectionable conduct in any way. By self-deprecatingly agreeing to the new Orwellian rules of social conduct, you get to survive, and maybe even thrive. Be yourself, be candid, or otherwise veer from the straight and narrow and you risk armageddon: Expulsion from the only organization that supports –mentally, socially, and financially– formerly-haredi men like yourself.A telling illustration of this double standard is that when women show the slightest discomfort, the staff and others rush to identify and chide the male evildoers, but when a certain man once complained to a staff member that a certain woman Footstepper was slandering a bunch of men and hurling insults at them thereby causing them great distress, the response was “you’re all adults, deal with it!”And while women hardly ever get in trouble by subtly or even overtly expressing sexual interest in men, the reverse is not the case. Both Footsteps staff and its dominant female members now define harassment as “remarks or conduct having sexual innuendo” (Footsteps Respectful Space and Safe Events Guidelines). This Footstepper was shocked at how rudely he was rebuffed merely for making a flattering remark in good faith:I’m at a party and some OTD girl half-jokes to me by saying, “Oh you gonna go hang out with those hot girl over there” indicating that she’s not as attractive to them. As a decent person and a long time friend, I could not let that slide and I told her, “Listen, with your beauty and your personality you’re not just here, you’re here” indicating with my hand that I hold in high esteem, and won’t let her put herself down. This OTD friend responds by taking a step back raising her hand in a defensive position and in a defensive matter replies to me, “Look, listen, just wanna be clear, I’m not interested in dating!”One woman radical-feminist Footstepper asserts: “we have no choice [about being mean to men] because men are so aggressive; they deserve it”. Once while riding through a hasidic section of the neighborhood in the company of some friends, she rolled down her window and spontaneously hurled insults at a gaggle of young hasidic boys schmoozing on a street corner minding their own business. “You’re a creep!” — she reportedly yelled at one of them. When this incident was later reported to staff, not only was she not rebuked for it, but she was shortly thereafter –in a show of irony rivaling that of the classical Greeks!– entrusted to moderate a lecture on sex and healthy relationships, given an internship, and then hired to a full-time position in the organization.Another high-ranking Footsteps officer once said to a male applicant during an intake session “you smell, just like the rest of them [Hasidic men]”, and abruptly left the session. When word got around of this incident and it engendered an uproar both among Footsteppers and the Haredi sector, she was merely re-assigned within the organization.Footsteps application forms now routinely prompt applicants to specify what pronouns they’d like to use. The organization itself has opted to use “they” for all genders. In a May 9 announcement of the hiring of a new officer, an email message reads:[Female name] is a long-time member of Footsteps… We are so excited to bring them on full time! In their new role, [name] will continue to work with Team Community Engagement to bring exciting, creative and meaningful events and programs to you, our members! And, they’ll also bring their extreme organizing and administrative skills to…In 2018 Footsteps, it’s hard to find the guys. They have mysteriously vanished.How did Footsteps evolve into such a radical leftist organization? How did it manage to alienate such a large sector of its organic constituency? Even more mysteriously: How is the organization, its donors, its principal, staff, board of directors, MAC (member advisory council) not cognizant of the perverseness of its own path, and how starkly it deviates from the original mission of this fifteen-year-old organization?It is a poignant and fascinating tale –one that is nuanced, complex, and inseparable from the social turmoil that has gripped the nation at large, and college campuses in particular, during this same period.As recently as ten years ago, things were still normal –at college campuses and at Footsteps. The young Footsteps organization, circa 2008, had a thriving, free-wheeling, liberal vibe. Its “food and schmooze” events were created for the express purpose to allow formerly haredi members to vent about their constrained past and express their gripes with its forced conformity. There were no restrictions, formal or informal, to what could be brought up in such discourses. Irreverent anecdotes of one’s first cheeseburger were mixed with musings about how one first learned that the Torah was not written by God and that turning on a light on shabbos would not result in electrocution.These first-generation Footsteppers did not see themselves as victims. They did not seek Footsteps’ help to redress a grievance, but merely to forge ahead in life in their newly chosen secular path. Some in this first generation left their haredi community because they didn’t believe, some were stigmatized for being divorced, some were ostracized for being gay, and some left because they were bullied or just plain couldn’t fit in socially. What they all had in common is that they were heading in the same direction, supported each other, looked forward to a brighter tomorrow, and –perhaps most saliently– could say whatever was on their mind within an audience that “got it”, and not be rebuked for it. Footsteps then was the antithesis of Orthodoxy.Gender didn’t matter in those early years. True, there was a stark imbalance in the ratio of men to women Footsteppers: at a typical Footsteps event in those years, one could expect to find about 80% men. But a woman’s anecdote of how she was expelled from school for wearing translucent stockings or reading a banned book meshed well with the man’s account of how he was considered a “bad bohur” for slacking off on his Talmudic studies or for expressing skepticism on a principle of faith. Sporadic sexually-tinged banter was traded between the genders, but it was not considered offensive, let alone at loggerheads with the objective of the meetings.And then it all changed.Footsteps excitedly retweets a member’s coming out as queer. But there is no rolling out the carpet for ordinary out-comers, such as those who routinely come out of their house to put in an honest day’s work.By 2009-2010 the gender imbalance had become a problem. As the first cohort of Footsteppers came into their own and assimilated more into the mainstream, they increasingly began to pursue romantic engagements. With such a lopsided ratio of men to women, attractive women found themselves bombarded with leering eyes and pestering mouths. Men would pile up on them and compete for their attention. They all sought to impress the sole woman and get her phone number. Their wooing tactics were blunt and persistent, and it was difficult to shake them off; there was no nuance and game-play as there was in mainstream society. This was compounded with the fact that the women were as sexually immature and clueless as the men. Women began complaining to staff and to anyone who would listen that the men were “creeps”; they were disgustingly lecherous and insufferable.This is, perhaps, the point where Footsteps made its first big mistake. Instead of bringing both parties to the table and teach them both how to go about courtship in an orderly and amenable fashion, it focused its efforts on a different sort of message –one that was at first directed to women only: “Don’t you ever feel impelled to satisfy a man because he is persistent and you feel that you owe it to him. He ought to and will accept your boundaries. Make it clear to him what you are comfortable with and what not. If you are not ready to date, say so. If he continues to pester you, that’s sexual harassment that you are entitled to report and have redressed.” There was nothing untoward with this message per se. The problem was that it did not at all address the issue of the proliferation of young testosterone-imbued young men who were biologically and socially eager to find an outlet for their amorous desires. Many of these men had left haredi jewry for this very reason: In order to be able to freely pursue sexual relationships. The new ethos in the organization was that such a motive for leaving was ignoble, uncouth and invalid. Whatever the reason you are leaving and whatever you desire out of Footsteps, dating should not be on the list –Footsteps insinuated. As to the question of what is a legitimate venue for satisfying a man’s sexual urges –“go fly a kite” seemed to be the retort.Men eventually learned their lesson: stop wooing women at Footsteps events, unless you’re experienced, intuitive, and you really know what you’re doing. Concurrently, women began overreacting: they began assuming that all male advances toward them were selfish, creepy, and malicious. The right thing to do, Footsteps had taught them, was to reject them all –no matter when, where, and how. Paradoxically, liberal 21st-century Footsteps women had reverted to squeamish, Victorian-era female prudes.When a highly intelligent and accomplished Footstepper (who has requested anonymity) gave a Limmud lecture in 2016 in which he said –as an aside– that he had hoped to find romantic partners through Footsteps events, he was instantly and rudely interrupted by an attending staff member. “I just want to make it clear: Footsteps does not support dating between members, just to make it clear” –she interjected.Reflecting on the event, the Limmud-lecturer had this to say:After leaving the haredi community in part due to its repressive attitudes to human sexuality, I never expected to be publicly shamed by a Footsteps staffer for expressing tepid romantic desires in a sensitive, vulnerable, non-harassing way. This hostility to male romantic interest was more severe than I had ever experienced, even in the haredi community itself.Obama-era “Dear Colleague” LettersAll the while, while Footsteps was in the throes of sorting out its dating fiasco, developments in the broader world were unfolding that would ultimately affect the national culture, especially in the millennial demographic that Footsteps was now beginning to serve. Vice President Joe Biden declared in 2011 (based mostly on the prodding by radical activists, but not on empirical data) that there was an epidemic of sexual assault on college campuses. Rapists and predators were putatively roaming the campuses with impunity, and the Obama administration would no longer tolerate it. Henceforth, colleges would be responsible to accept with utmost gravitas every report of sexual assault on campus, conduct their own official investigations, and take appropriate actions against the alleged perpetrators (which was later shortened to simply “perpetrators”), even before the cases were adjudicated; and all this regardless of whatever charges are brought in an extra-campus civil or criminal court.As reported by a comprehensive Atlantic article, some of the effects of the new draconian anti-sexual assault regime were as follows:All complaints had to elicit “official” investigations. Thousands of new full-time “Title IX coordinators” were hired by colleges across the country. Official investigations took months and called for formal interviews with all witnesses to an alleged event.Third-parties were encouraged to bring complaints of sexual harassment. Such complaints were investigated with as much zeal as victim-reported complaints even when the alleged victim was not pursuing it or had stated that there was no offense taken. College staff were required to report all incidents that they thought might be harassment.Affirmative consent became the new standard in some colleges for permissible sexual conduct. In theory, this meant that every action that the man and woman did on each other had to be preceded by explicit consent to the action in question. “May I stroke your hair?”, –“yes you may stroke my hair now!”; “may I caress your butt?” –“yes, you may do so now”, and so on.Women were no longer deemed capable of giving consent if they were “under the influence” — a term that was not defined. Now, any woman who was even slightly tipsy when making out could accuse her partner of rape retroactively if and when the relationship eventually went sour.Women’s grievances were addressed even when there was no objective transgression and no wrongdoer. What mattered is that she felt a “sexually hostile environment”. In one case, a man was restricted on campus because a woman had complained that he resembled someone who had raped her in the past and she was triggered by seeing him.The woman was believed to “virtually always be telling the truth” when reporting an alleged sexual assault. A study was cited that concluded that only 2-10% of reported rapes are false. (On closer examination, there was no knowing that only 2-10% are false –since many of the other 90-98% of cases were simply not pursued, or dropped for lack of evidence, thus not resulting in any finding of guilt on the part of the “rapist” either.)A conflation between “non-consensual” and “unwanted” occured. If a woman doesn’t want sex, or later decides retroactively that she didn’t really want it, then it is also deemed to have been non-consensual. (In truth, women may have conflicted feelings about wanting to have sex with a man. They want it and don’t want simultaneously. Their body says yes and their mind says no. This is not the same as sexual assault).While a new crop of Obama-era dear-colleague letters were being issued in 2014-15, the microaggression and trigger warning revolution came into full swing (as reported by another Atlantic article). Administrators in dozens of colleges were holding pre-semester training sessions exhorting deans to be sensitive to student’s traumas and what might trigger them. Trigger warnings would henceforward be mandatory, and those offended would be recused from attending or watching such material, without any challenges. Offensive speech was now just as bad as offensive action, and there were no objective criteria for it. If the “victim” declares the speech offensive, then one’s arguing with this declaration only shows their insensitivity, intransigence, and meanness. “You don’t argue with one’s feelings” –was the new doctrine.Also in 2015, William Bruce Jenner, a celebrated Olympic athlete, declared that he had been suffering from “gender dysphoria” since his youth, that “for all intents and purposes I was a woman”, and that he would be transitioning anatomically and in outward appearance to that of a woman. Thenceforth she would be known as Caitlyn Jenner –a household name now.Footsteps Catches OnWhile all this turmoil was playing out in mainstream society, Footsteppers were taking note. Having abandoned traditional Jewish observance and values, being proud of it, and being apprised of the latest and hippest developments in the mainstream, “cool” Footsteppers began competing against one other on this new plain of victimhood-idolization, offendedness-mongering, emotional fragility, and sexual deviancy.And the organizational leadership and staff seemed all too happy to indulge it.In 2015 Leah Vincent, an intelligent Harvard graduate from a Yeshivish Pittsburg background, published her memoir Cut Me Loose. In it she describes in lurid details how she became a sex fiend after leaving her relatively modern Orthodox lifestyle. The book blames everything on this planet that moves for her alleged ills, even though she seems to be fairly well-adjusted in fact: Her parents abandoned her, her boyfriends raped her, the community policed and suppressed her, et al. The book inordinately focuses on sex scenes and bad actors, but has no self-reflection or an attempt to offer insight into the world she has come from from or the secular world she has entered. In her book tour and on TV interviews, Vincent began propagating the myth that there was an unusually high incidence of sexual assault among women who were leaving the Orthodox fold.And yet it was she, Leah Vincent, who became the new star of the Footsteps organization. Her book readings and appearances were promoted ad nauseum by the organization. She was invited as honorary speaker at large annual events, and she was inducted into its boardroom.Meanwhile, Yisroel Stein, A formerly-hasidic man from the Vizhnitz hasidic sect who had left the community in 2013 was determined not to be upstaged by Vincent. He made a bombshell declaration in his blog that year: He was born in the wrong body. Not only was he and ought he be free to embark on a “second transition” into the feminine gender, but his body was in fact feminine all along; it was just misidentified at birth. That this was the same year that Caitlyn Jenner made her revelation was pure coincidence, of course.The newly christened female, Abby Stein, would become a star in the Footsteps world just as Caitlyn Jenner was in the mainstream. By then, Footsteppers had been indoctrinated into a new orthodoxy of how to properly behave among peers. The Yeshiva-mannerism-saturated boys club of 2009 was by then long passe. To be a hip member of the new club, Footsteppers had to be egalitarian; they had to affirm that genders were equal and capable of all things equally no matter what their disparate biologies would seem to indicate. The new victimhood culture and the unwavering acceptance of all complainers’ reports and their fancied perceptions of the world around them was firmly ensconced. When Abby announced her change in gender, what should have been a stunned, confounded audience instead was a blase, unconditionally-accepting, congratulatory one. The mazel tov’s were gushing in: “How brave of her to do so” was the motif. Footsteps, the organization, pulled out all the stops in promoting Abby Stein’s budding career –one that involved a publicity tour and speaking engagements across the liberal Jewish world and elsewhere.Last year, the “Mike New York” episode unfolded. Mike NY was a womanizer footstepper. He had a way of seducing women, some of whom later regretted it. When one particular woman, A.B., had buyer’s remorse over her anal intercourse experience with Mike the night before, she decided to go public with her gripe. She first posted it in a small Facebook “OTD sisterhood” group, to unanimous sympathy. She then changed the story and posted it to a much wider OTD group and she became an instant celebrity. The new story started with a statement of fact: “Mike NY raped me!” Hundreds of outraged OTD’ers –a monolithic, sanctimonious, deranged, virtue-signalling mob tripped over one another in expressing their indignation over the consummate evil of Mike NY. There were no questions asked, no corroboration of the account, no critical inquiry into the couple’s courtship. Mike NY was an evil monster and had to be punished swiftly and severely. By the time the thread was done spewing its vitriol, some even wondered how he was still on the loose, how had he not yet been arrested and prosecuted and imprisoned.The fury broadened to encompass Footsteps. How did Footsteps “allow” this to happen? Didn’t they know about Mike’s transgressions? Hadn’t people reported it to Footsteps? Why did they not take any action? How is he still a member? Isn’t there mandatory reporting to the police? Sure enough, within a few days, Mike’s Footsteps membership was abruptly terminated and the organization apologized to its members, promised to make amends, and to draw up newer, stricter guidelines on sexual interaction between members. It also offered psychological counseling for all the dainty souls who were triggered and traumatized by learning of the event. Mike attempted to vindicate himself by posting screenshots of the dialogue between him and A.B. in the days leading up to and during the alleged rape. The texts showed that A.B. had been flirtatious and cooperative not only prior but also after that fateful night. It was to no avail. Footsteps quickly removed his defensive posts, citing a “violation of privacy” –a privacy, however, that was only accorded to the accuser, not the accused. When The Forward later reported on the story, it revealed the identity of the accused, but not of the accuser.When One of Us came out last year (2017), Footsteps avidly promoted the film. The film, a Hollywood production true to form, hailed its three protagonists, all of who left the Ultra-orthodox sector, as heroes. Without any questioning, elucidating, clarifying, giving background information, or even contextualizing, the film presents the plight of the protagonists as moving and real. “What can I do about this abuse?” is what the viewer is apt to think. But the effusive passions the film purports to elicit, are a house of cards. In point of fact, the protagonists were not abused, were not wronged, did not experience attempted assassination, and did not suffer from gross psychological damage stemming from molestation. Conveniently, the producers hinted at those evildoers in the haredi community, but did not provide sufficient details for the accusations that lay at the core of the narrative for them to be falsifiable. In other words, it was a sentimental ouvre extraordinaire, with little rational basis to substantiate it. It preyed on the masses’ basest instincts and emotional vulnerabilities to rivet the viewer and impart the message of “Haredim are abusers of women and children”.Another woman with whom Footsteps developed a very close partnership is Fraidy Reiss. She directs a social justice enterprise called Unchained at Last whose mission it is to expose to the world how prevalent underage and forced marriages are in the haredi world and elsewhere. The portrait she draws is of Hasidic women, specifically, (what good is a victimhood story if it doesn’t singularly focus on women, after all) being married off to men in the community against their will or at an age when they cannot yet give informed consent. This is a blatantly false portrayal. Anyone with even superficial knowledge of matchmaking in the community knows that the overwhelming majority of women (and men!) have no objection to their arranged marriages, do not express regret later in life, and are quite satisfied with their intra-communal matches –ones that are optimized for a slew of demographic factors that the engaging parties have in common and therefore have both a theoretical and empirical high rate of success. Oh, and there’s no underage marriage either.On the prosaic level –apart from its celebrity promotions– Footsteps came to adopt virtually all the newfangled Obama-era mores and attitudes toward sexuality, victimhood, offendedness, and egalitarianism. Following are some developmental parallels within Footsteps to that of the Title-IX-enhanced and trigger-protected campuses, in the ensuing years.1. Third-party complaints are encouraged by Footsteps, just like the Dear Colleague letters urged:If you experience or witness hostile or harassing conduct, you should contact Footsteps staff… If safe to do so, the person(s) who is the targeted subject, as well as any witness may also demand that the offenders stop the offensive conduct or communication.Poor, wretched, Footstepper victim. She is so victimized that she doesn’t even know it; she is incapable of recognizing her victimhood state. Not to worry, the good-samaritan prudes in the crowd who “witness” the wanton attack can score social brownie points by intervening on her behalf.2. Complainant is virtually always telling the truth. According to a Footsteps staff member, in reference to the Mike NY episode: “we believe the accuser”. This, even though, the accuser herself’s initial FB Sisterhood account did not describe an event that anyone would consider rape, nor one that she herself considered rape at that time.3. Girl is always right. Guy is always wrong. Girl is always the victim. Guy is the aggressor. No matter what. A male Footsteps member once recounted to an organizational officer that he was asked to leave a rural bar by a woman who felt uncomfortable baring her breasts to her acquaintances there in his presence, and asked whether this was appropriate. The Footsteps officer’s response was: “what was your body language that made this woman uncomfortable?” Another male Footstepper opines: “the religious view of the OTD feminist is that the women are always perfect and always victims and that men are evil and the aggressors”.4. Double standard. At a roundtable discussion between select Footsteppers, a particular male member remarked that “the environment in Footsteps is so toxic that I refrain from even considering asking anyone out”. To which a female member responded with a mischievous and dismissive chuckle: “that’s huey, we are so promiscuous here that I’ve slept with practically everyone”.5. Emotional reasoning: “I feel, therefore it is”. An extreme culture of agreeableness has come to dominate social group proceedings. Says one male Footstepper:“I’m not comfortable with…” is a common refrain. When someone on the computer overheard me and someone discussing transgenders in the military, he said “this conversation is making me uncomfortable”, thus shutting it down. There is a clear social pressure not to talk about certain things, and if you do, you’d better toe the party line. It used to be that anything was debatable: current events, politics, etc. Now, debates are no longer encouraged: don’t disagree too strongly, be accepting and supportive. When someone once spoke in a lilt that was redolent of yeshivish culture, one participant said “I’m not comfortable with this. It reminds me of my childhood”.I know people who stopped coming when they couldn’t discuss certain things. People are turned off by people not being able to speak their mind. Sexually suggestive language is prohibited. Jocular hitting on a girl is frowned upon, and report to staff is encouraged. It became a mental wellness group. I now go very infrequently to Footsteps because of this. To drop-in groups I don’t go at all. John [dummy name for a staff member] pushed back on this culture but wasn’t much successful. Saul [dummy name of different staff member] is not aware of this at all. He says he lets people express their opinions, not realizing that it’s all on the same side.The most sensitive [in the group] tend to be the loudest, and they stay the longest during the schmooze sessions… a lot of people who should be pushing back, don’t do so because they [men, who are less secularly-educated than women] can’t speak English.6. The fostering of a more feminine, cooperative, sugarcoated, supportive environment. According to reports, one particular staff member explicitly said that she wants to make Footsteps a more “feminist” place. When a man who was invited to emcee an event declined the invite citing the organization’s fostering of a male-hostile environment, the staff member wrote apathetically in an email message:I appreciate your explanation. If there was anything you think staff could be doing better, please let me know. If your feeling like Footsteps isn’t the space for you now- that’s also fair. But we do miss your presence here.7. Many rank and file Footsteppers now naively subscribe to the newly devised doctrine of affirmative consent. Although the standard is comically ludicrous and has never been tried in any society in space or time other than our own in our own time, some members have now been inculcated with the new orthodoxy. They believe that the Mike NY episode could have been averted if only Mike had prompted at every step of the intercourse with: “may I penetrate you now?”, “may I go an inch deeper?”, “may I continue for another minute”.8. Conflation of unwanted with opposed. The Mike NY episode amply demonstrated how this conflation had taken hold. Even though it was as clear as day, by the woman’s own undisputed account, that the coitus and sodomy that she had experienced was by consent, the mob was livid with him. How could he have known that the woman would later regret it? How could he have possibly acted otherwise? It didn’t matter! If it’s unwanted, now or later, or even if it’s only quasi-wanted, then it’s rape; even if there’s no outward sign of the unwantedness and no way for the man to read the woman’s thoughts.Footsteps Application prompts for nonconventional genders and preferred pronounBut at that point in Footsteps’ perverse evolution it was hard to know which came first, the chicken or the egg. By 2015 the organization had become permeated by third-wave feminism, victimhood-mongering, transgenderism, and lesbianism –so much so that straight men were no longer attending events or playing a central role in them. Says one male ex-member:I would go to this [Footsteps-sponsored club] event, and there were like fifty people there. The music starts and eight lesbian women with tattoos and piercings would start dancing in the middle, along with two or three others who were straight. The vibe is just not there; I can’t get myself to dance along. I love these people, and I wish them all the best, but I felt like I was the only one not lesbian. Ever been to a gay club?… A ratio of 51% [straight]-49% [gay] might still be a challenge, but one that could be overcome. When it’s 80-20 LGBTQ vibe, I can’t do it.The organization had never bothered to teach women how to be comfortable in accepting the advances of men. It had never exerted the slightest of efforts to coach men –ones from haredi backgrounds who have never interacted with feamles in their entire lives– on how to approach women. But by 2017 it became a lot worse. Decade-old “sexuality workshops” were of the precautionary caliber: they taught women to use protection, they taught men that they must ensure that women were receptive to their advances before proceeding, etc. Now the lectures were teaching the alphabet soup of new genders out there: what’s the difference between queer and lesbian? How do you know whether you’re straight or gay? What are your choices if you believe your assigned gender does not correspond to your “real” gender.Footsteps application accommodates folk who fancy themselves having a last name other than what they actually have.Indeed, while condoms have been a prominent fixture at “the space” since the organization’s inception, they are hardly ever put to use. According to the estimation of a professional dating expert who is familiar with the Footsteps demographic, 70% of the [straight] Footsteps membership never gets laid at all:Footsteppers go to school (often sponsored or subsidized by the organization) spend there all day, but don’t talk to anyone. I won’t be shocked if 60-70% of members are completely out of the dating world. The ones who do date, date down, because they don’t have the necessary courtship skills [to be able to attract and sustain relationships with folks from their own league].“How did the organization lose its focus?” –he wonders:Hypothetically, if 60% of Footsteppers had an eating disorder, would the organization start pushing eating disorder remediation as its dominant message? Perhaps it would be appropriate to allocate some portion of its budget for something that so many of its members have in common, but certainly not the lion’s share. There are a gazillion LGBTQ organizations out there in New York. It’s all great. But that’s not the mission of the organization. When Yankel Haimovitsch who doubts his haredi religious tenets comes knocking on Footsteps’ door for help, the first thing he encounters is transgenders, lesbians, and Abby Stein, and encounters the jarring “they” pronoun. He is daunted. Maybe seven years down the road, that would be fine with him, or maybe not. But right then and there it’s way too overwhelming and alien for him. Even “One of Us” that the organization is assiduously promoting –what did it do? how does it help me and you? It generates lots of donations cuz people feel bad, but it doesn’t help the constituency.Straying from the Mission“Art”, and similar subjective fluff is big business at Footsteps. Objectivity and substantive help is hard to find.Critics point out that Footsteps has never strayed as far afield from its mission as it currently has. It does very little to help its members assimilate into mainstream society –its purported mission. Only a puny portion of it is roughly two-million-dollar budget is earmarked toward helping members. After paying for its bloated staff, its fancy office buildings, and the periodic hiring of semi-famous professors or writers to give lectures on irrelevant topics, not much meat is left on the bones for actually helping members, and from the portion that does go toward that, much of it is college scholarship grants or summer intern grants.What new members desperately need the most are:A listening ear, a shoulder to lean on, and wise counsel. They need someone who “gets” them, has a deep understanding of their predicament, and is capable of advising them and helping them sort through the dizzying array of choices that freedom enables. What a member is apt to get instead is a referral to one of dozens of organizations that Footsteps has developed working relationships with, and –at best– the consultation of a professional paper-pushing “social worker” who is not conversant with the challenges of fresh haredi departees and is, at any rate, pledged to an ethos of never telling a client what to do or even hinting at such.A home. They may need a place to stay in case they feel that they are being expelled from home, or if they feel the need for temporary breathing space from the rigid circumscribed ultra-orthodoxy of their home. Footsteps has steadfastly refused to budge on this. No housing!Along with Abby Stein, Abortion is now a core tenet of Footsteps OrthodoxyGainful employment. They need jobs, far more than they need, or could benefit from, a formal education (viz., a four-year college diploma that is nowadays useless anyway). They need financial independence above all else in life. They don’t need scholarships or exploitive internships. Footsteppers are not lazy and not stupid, but after forfeiting their social networks they need new ones in order to build up the trust and connections that typically lead to successful jobs. Footsteps could be doing this, but it’s too busy explaining to its members the difference between transitioning from male to female and female to male, and the distinction between cisgender and transgender, to have time left for anything else.Lastly and most importantly: they need mates. This is the elephant in the room. Footsteps tenaciously refuses to even acknowledge that this is a challenge, let alone do anything about it. In the sexually hypercharged era we live in, perhaps the organization fears that it may say something wrong and be accused of something. But by ignoring the most pressing desire of its new members, both men and women, it is rendering itself superfluous even as it could be immensely helpful. There are no coaching sessions on appropriate courtship methods. No counseling on appropriate venues to find mates. No discussion of factors that have been proven scientifically to increase the likelihood of successful long-term relationships and marriages. Nothing. An eerie silence has pervaded “the space” on all such matters, from the organization’s inception unto this day.Multiple people interviewed for this article report that they have contacted Footsteps’ leadership to voice their concern about the organization’s ill-directed, errant path. The response they get is something along the lines of the oh-so-polite “oh yeah, we hear you, you make a strong point and we value your feedback. We’ll study the matter and see what we can do”. But nothing gets done.Critics speculate as to the institutional incentives for this radical, irrational, and alienating, leftism; and the misguided channeling of the organization’s resources. One astute analyst observes:My feeling is that it has a lot to do with money. The organization thinks it’s good PR to demonstrate LGBTQ sensitivity, it gives them access to funds. It’s also a very easy choice: talk about empowerment of women, about why some men want to be treated like women, etc. –you can’t be criticized for it. It’s safe. Very PC. Alternatively, they can teach women how to be comfortable around men, teach men how to go about dating, and it’s a minefield. What if something goes wrong? It’s a lot easier and incontrovertible to teach a chef the safety rules while cooking, than teaching him how to cook… they’ll do lots on education, cuz it’s easy, but they are risk-averse. It’s a huge monstrosity of an organization. Their goal is not to make mistakes.What is one to do?There are currently two alternatives to Footsteps, both considerably more modest in organizational complexity, and both content in exposing haredi applicants to acculturation and modernism without the extreme leftism and secularism of Footsteps.Project Makom The organization’s declared mission is to help haredi people transition to a Modern Orthodox environment, not a secular one. However, Modern Orthodoxy is a logical way station toward secularism, and so its services are likely to be helpful even to those who seek to secularize completely. Moreover, few would-be OTD’ers/Footsteppers know in advance with absolute certainty that utter secularism is their optimal path in life. A beneficiary could accept the organization’s help in good conscience inasmuch as it isn’t known for sure in a transition’s early stages that the ultimate destination is complete irreligiosity.Project Acheinu by PHS

What does Chabad think of Footsteps?

After weeks of anxiety and suspense, Boruch Schneider [not the real name] opened up his inbox on May 21, 2018 to find the dreaded expulsion letter he had been expecting, and yet had hoped to somehow, miraculously, avert. As an ex-haredi young adult, he had been a member of the Footsteps organization, a membership that entitled him to participate in its exclusive social events, meet with social workers for consultation and support, and receive tuition subsidies, among other benefits. Now, the rug had just been pulled from under his feet: he was officially barred from all organizational benefits, for creating “an inhospitable environment for members who identify as LGBTQ”. That was a violation of his membership agreement: to “ensure the safety and security of fellow Footsteps members”, to “respect diverse opinions”, to “adhere fully and immediately with staff requests and instructions”, and to “inform a staff person if there is conduct or actions by others present that cause me concern or discomfort”.Boruch has become the latest victim of draconian measures devised by the radical left in order to shield and coddle fragile young souls from the harshness of reality: In the wanton new world of trigger warnings, safe spaces, and micro-agressions, it didn’t matter that his offensive action was only verbal, it didn’t matter that it was merely “construed” as offensive (not deliberately intended to be so), it didn’t matter that the “safety and security” cited were mental and subjective. Under the new rules feelings were real, and their irritation was just as bad as a physical assault.Boruch has run afoul of politically correct conventions regarding gender, diversity and egalitarianism. In group conversations, he dared voice his brazen heterodox opinions, denying that women were being victimized everywhere, that men were aggressive and bad, and that not enough is being done to welcome transgenders and gays into the “diverse” Footsteps community, et al. When someone in the group once mentioned something about diversity, Boruch had snickered, making the speaker uncomfortable. The more Boruch was told to be gentle and polite, the more he was implored to withhold his uncouth views –the more he felt pushed against the wall, and the more he felt impelled to fight back and fend for himself.Boruch was messing with the holy cow of the new leftist cult: the belief, veneration, and sacralization of the ethereal nobility of all things feminine. When offered counseling and remediation, Boruch defiantly declined. For that his membership in the organization was revoked. He was a dangerous and insufferable heretic propagating heresy amidst the new leftist religion –reviled like Boruch Spinoza, and doomed to suffer his fate.Objectively speaking, Boruch’s repudiation of the new radical leftist views that have overtaken much of our society in the last four years, wasn’t of a different nature from the radical left’s objection to his views. It was simply a disagreement over values, not unlike any of the myriad of other political, social, and religious disagreements that have been going on in America for centuries and in Footsteps for a decade. In eras past, however, members of opposing teams relished debates and opportunities to joust on contemporary controversies, whether they were ultimately successful in convincing the other party or not. In the past no one ever sought to ban debate in a social club. This time, in our own era, it is different: there is an orthodoxy, and those who disagree had better keep it to themselves or leave. The orthodox position is the correct position, so it can not possibly offend anyone, whereas the heterodox position is erroneous, meanand hurtful. You had better shut up or leave the group. Diversity is welcome, sure, –so long as it is within the orthodox range of opinions.Boruch’s case stands out because he was determined not to back down. Dozens of other men who have once been frequent Footsteppers simply stopped attending or do so less frequently. In correspondence with HN they describe an environment for straight men as dangerous as a minefield, and as crooked as a dog’s hind leg. Men could be sex-teased by the opposite sex, but, if they then take the bait, the women were apt –nay encouraged– to rebuke or report them for “sexual harassment” for daring to flirt with them. Moreover, not just the purported victim, but anyone who witnesses conduct that is “hostile or harassing”, is enjoined to “contact Footsteps staff” who is then to launch an investigation; and by the new standards all “remarks or conduct having sexual innuendo” are by default hostile and harassing.They describe an environment where self-righteous posturing, virtue-signaling and vindictive protectiveness (a term coined by Jonathan Haidt) is rampant. Women, gays, and transgenders are feted and held in high esteem, while straight men are shamed, shunned, ignored, and accused of being aggressive and evil merely for their gender. Telling victimhood tales is applauded, but voicing even the slightest misgivings thereof is met with blank and awkward stares from others – not necessarily because they all disagree, but because they fear the repercussions of sympathizing with heterodox opinions that are at odd with the dominant culture. The few straight men who do decide to remain active in Footsteps quickly discover the new rules of the game: Always sympathize with all victimhood tales by women, and never argue with such tales or attempt to “rationalize” objectionable conduct in any way. By self-deprecatingly agreeing to the new Orwellian rules of social conduct, you get to survive, and maybe even thrive. Be yourself, be candid, or otherwise veer from the straight and narrow and you risk armageddon: Expulsion from the only organization that supports –mentally, socially, and financially– formerly-haredi men like yourself.A telling illustration of this double standard is that when women show the slightest discomfort, the staff and others rush to identify and chide the male evildoers, but when a certain man once complained to a staff member that a certain woman Footstepper was slandering a bunch of men and hurling insults at them thereby causing them great distress, the response was “you’re all adults, deal with it!”And while women hardly ever get in trouble by subtly or even overtly expressing sexual interest in men, the reverse is not the case. Both Footsteps staff and its dominant female members now define harassment as “remarks or conduct having sexual innuendo” (Footsteps Respectful Space and Safe Events Guidelines). This Footstepper was shocked at how rudely he was rebuffed merely for making a flattering remark in good faith:I’m at a party and some OTD girl half-jokes to me by saying, “Oh you gonna go hang out with those hot girl over there” indicating that she’s not as attractive to them. As a decent person and a long time friend, I could not let that slide and I told her, “Listen, with your beauty and your personality you’re not just here, you’re here” indicating with my hand that I hold in high esteem, and won’t let her put herself down. This OTD friend responds by taking a step back raising herhand in a defensive position and in a defensive matter replies to me, “Look, listen, just wanna be clear, I’m not interested in dating!”One woman radical-feminist Footstepper asserts: “we have no choice [about being mean to men] because men are so aggressive; they deserve it”. Once while riding through a hasidic section of the neighborhood in the company of some friends, she rolled down her window and spontaneously hurled insults at a gaggle of young hasidic boys schmoozing on a street corner minding their own business. “You’re a creep!” — she reportedly yelled at one of them. When this incident was later reported to staff, not only was she not rebuked for it, but she was shortly thereafter –in a show of irony rivaling that of the classical Greeks!– entrusted to moderate a lecture on sex and healthy relationships, given an internship, and then hired to a full-time position in the organization.Another high-ranking Footsteps officer once said to a male applicant during an intake session “you smell, just like the rest of them [Hasidic men]”, and abruptly left the session. When word got around of this incident and it engendered an uproar both among Footsteppers and the Haredi sector, she was merely re-assigned within the organization.Footsteps application forms now routinely prompt applicants to specify what pronouns they’d like to use. The organization itself has opted to use “they” for all genders. In a May 9 announcement of the hiring of a new officer, an email message reads:[Female name] is a long-time member of Footsteps… We are so excited to bring them on full time! In their new role, [name] will continue to work with Team Community Engagement to bring exciting, creative and meaningful events and programs to you, our members! And, they’ll also bring their extreme organizing and administrative skills to…In 2018 Footsteps, it’s hard to find the guys. They have mysteriously vanished.How did Footsteps evolve into such a radical leftist organization? How did it manage to alienate such a large sector of its organic constituency? Even more mysteriously: How is the organization, its donors, its principal, staff, board of directors, MAC (member advisory council) not cognizant of the perverseness of its own path, and how starkly it deviates from the original mission of this fifteen-year-old organization?It is a poignant and fascinating tale –one that is nuanced, complex, and inseparable from the social turmoil that has gripped the nation at large, and college campuses in particular, during this same period.As recently as ten years ago, things were still normal –at college campuses and at Footsteps. The young Footsteps organization, circa 2008, had a thriving, free-wheeling, liberal vibe. Its “food and schmooze” events were created for the express purpose to allow formerly haredi members to vent about their constrained past and express their gripes with its forced conformity. There were no restrictions, formal or informal, to what could be brought up in such discourses. Irreverent anecdotes of one’s first cheeseburger were mixed with musings about how one first learned that the Torah was not written by God and that turning on a light on shabbos would not result in electrocution.These first-generation Footsteppers did not see themselves as victims. They did not seek Footsteps’ help to redress a grievance, but merely to forge ahead in life in their newly chosen secular path. Some in this first generation left their haredi community because they didn’t believe, some were stigmatized for being divorced, some were ostracized for being gay, and some left because they were bullied or just plain couldn’t fit in socially. What they all had in common is that they were heading in the same direction, supported each other, looked forward to a brighter tomorrow, and –perhaps most saliently– could say whatever was on their mind within an audience that “got it”, and not be rebuked for it. Footsteps then was the antithesis of Orthodoxy.Gender didn’t matter in those early years. True, there was a stark imbalance in the ratio of men to women Footsteppers: at a typical Footsteps event in those years, one could expect to find about 80% men. But a woman’s anecdote of how she was expelled from school for wearing translucent stockings or reading a banned book meshed well with the man’s account of how he was considered a “bad bohur” for slacking off on his Talmudic studies or for expressing skepticism on a principle of faith. Sporadic sexually-tinged banter was traded between the genders, but it was not considered offensive, let alone at loggerheads with the objective of the meetings.And then it all changed.Footsteps excitedly retweets a member’s coming out as queer. But there is no rolling out the carpet for ordinary out-comers, such as those who routinely come out of their house to put in an honest day’s work.By 2009-2010 the gender imbalance had become a problem. As the first cohort of Footsteppers came into their own and assimilated more into the mainstream, they increasingly began to pursue romantic engagements. With such a lopsided ratio of men to women, attractive women found themselves bombarded with leering eyes and pestering mouths. Men would pile up on them and compete for their attention. They all sought to impress the sole woman and get her phone number. Their wooing tactics were blunt and persistent, and it was difficult to shake them off; there was no nuance and game-play as there was in mainstream society. This was compounded with the fact that the women were as sexually immature and clueless as the men. Women began complaining to staff and to anyone who would listen that the men were “creeps”; they were disgustingly lecherous and insufferable.This is, perhaps, the point where Footsteps made its first big mistake. Instead of bringing both parties to the table and teach them both how to go about courtship in an orderly and amenable fashion, it focused its efforts on a different sort of message –one that was at first directed to women only: “Don’t you ever feel impelled to satisfy a man because he is persistent and you feel that you owe it to him. He ought to and will accept your boundaries. Make it clear to him what you are comfortable with and what not. If you are not ready to date, say so. If he continues to pester you, that’s sexual harassment that you are entitled to report and have redressed.” There was nothing untoward with this message per se. The problem was that it did not at all address the issue of the proliferation of young testosterone-imbued young men who were biologically and socially eager to find an outlet for their amorous desires. Many of these men had left haredi jewry for this very reason: In order to be able to freely pursue sexual relationships. The new ethos in the organization was that such a motive for leaving was ignoble, uncouth and invalid. Whatever the reason you are leaving and whatever you desire out of Footsteps, dating should not be on the list –Footsteps insinuated. As to the question of what is a legitimate venue for satisfying a man’s sexual urges –“go fly a kite” seemed to be the retort.Men eventually learned their lesson: stop wooing women at Footsteps events, unless you’re experienced, intuitive, and you really know what you’re doing. Concurrently, women began overreacting: they began assuming that all male advances toward them were selfish, creepy, and malicious. The right thing to do, Footsteps had taught them, was to reject them all –no matter when, where, and how. Paradoxically, liberal 21st-century Footsteps women had reverted to squeamish, Victorian-era female prudes.When a highly intelligent and accomplished Footstepper (who has requested anonymity) gave a Limmud lecture in 2016 in which he said –as an aside– that he had hoped to find romantic partners through Footsteps events, he was instantly and rudely interrupted by an attending staff member. “I just want to make it clear: Footsteps does not support dating between members, just to make it clear” –she interjected.Reflecting on the event, the Limmud-lecturer had this to say:After leaving the haredi community in part due to its repressive attitudes to human sexuality, I never expected to be publicly shamed by a Footsteps staffer for expressing tepid romantic desires in a sensitive, vulnerable, non-harassing way. This hostility to male romantic interest was more severe than I had ever experienced, even in the haredi community itself.Obama-era “Dear Colleague” LettersAll the while, while Footsteps was in the throes of sorting out its dating fiasco, developments in the broader world were unfolding that would ultimately affect the national culture, especially in the millennial demographic that Footsteps was now beginning to serve. Vice President Joe Biden declared in 2011 (based mostly on the prodding by radical activists, but not on empirical data) that there was an epidemic of sexual assault on college campuses. Rapists and predators were putatively roaming the campuses with impunity, and the Obama administration would no longer tolerate it. Henceforth, colleges would be responsible to accept with utmost gravitas every report of sexual assault on campus, conduct their own official investigations, and take appropriate actions against the alleged perpetrators (which was later shortened to simply “perpetrators”), even before the cases were adjudicated; and all this regardless of whatever charges are brought in an extra-campus civil or criminal court.As reported by a comprehensive Atlantic article, some of the effects of the new draconian antisexual assault regime were as follows:• All complaints had to elicit “official” investigations. Thousands of new full-time “Title IX coordinators” were hired by colleges across the country. Official investigations took months and called for formal interviews with all witnesses to an alleged event. • Third-parties were encouraged to bring complaints of sexual harassment. Such complaints were investigated with as much zeal as victim-reported complaints even when the alleged victim was not pursuing it or had stated that there was no offense taken. College staff were required to report all incidents that they thought might be harassment. • Affirmative consent became the new standard in some colleges for permissible sexual conduct. In theory, this meant that every action that the man and woman did on each other had to be preceded by explicit consent to the action in question. “May I stroke your hair?”, –“yes you may stroke my hair now!”; “may I caress your butt?” –“yes, you may do so now”, and so on. • Women were no longer deemed capable of giving consent if they were “under the influence” — a term that was not defined. Now, any woman who was even slightly tipsy when making out could accuse her partner of rape retroactively if and when the relationship eventually went sour. • Women’s grievances were addressed even when there was no objective transgression and no wrongdoer. What mattered is that she felt a “sexually hostile environment”. In one case, a man was restricted on campus because a woman had complained that he resembled someone who had raped her in the past and she was triggered by seeing him. • The woman was believed to “virtually always be telling the truth” when reporting an alleged sexual assault. A study was cited that concluded that only 2-10% of reportedrapes are false. (On closer examination, there was no knowing that only 2-10% are false – since many of the other 90-98% of cases were simply not pursued, or dropped for lack of evidence, thus not resulting in any finding of guilt on the part of the “rapist” either.) • A conflation between “non-consensual” and “unwanted” occured. If a woman doesn’t want sex, or later decides retroactively that she didn’t really want it, then it is also deemed to have been non-consensual. (In truth, women may have conflicted feelings about wanting to have sex with a man. They want it and don’t want simultaneously. Their body says yes and their mind says no. This is not the same as sexual assault).While a new crop of Obama-era dear-colleague letters were being issued in 2014-15, the microaggression and trigger warning revolution came into full swing (as reported by another Atlantic article). Administrators in dozens of colleges were holding pre-semester training sessions exhorting deans to be sensitive to student’s traumas and what might trigger them. Trigger warnings would henceforward be mandatory, and those offended would be recused from attending or watching such material, without any challenges. Offensive speech was now just as bad as offensive action, and there were no objective criteria for it. If the “victim” declares the speech offensive, then one’s arguing with this declaration only shows their insensitivity, intransigence, and meanness. “You don’t argue with one’s feelings” –was the new doctrine.Also in 2015, William Bruce Jenner, a celebrated Olympic athlete, declared that he had been suffering from “gender dysphoria” since his youth, that “for all intents and purposes I was a woman”, and that he would be transitioning anatomically and in outward appearance to that of a woman. Thenceforth she would be known as Caitlyn Jenner –a household name now.Footsteps Catches OnWhile all this turmoil was playing out in mainstream society, Footsteppers were taking note. Having abandoned traditional Jewish observance and values, being proud of it, and being apprised of the latest and hippest developments in the mainstream, “cool” Footsteppers began competing against one other on this new plain of victimhood-idolization, offendednessmongering, emotional fragility, and sexual deviancy.And the organizational leadership and staff seemed all too happy to indulge it.In 2015 Leah Vincent, an intelligent Harvard graduate from a Yeshivish Pittsburg background, published her memoir Cut Me Loose. In it she describes in lurid details how she became a sex fiend after leaving her relatively modern Orthodox lifestyle. The book blames everything on this planet that moves for her alleged ills, even though she seems to be fairly well-adjusted in fact: Her parents abandoned her, her boyfriends raped her, the community policed and suppressed her, et al. The book inordinately focuses on sex scenes and bad actors, but has no self-reflection or an attempt to offer insight into the world she has come from from or the secular world she has entered. In her book tour and on TV interviews, Vincent began propagating the myth that there was an unusually high incidence of sexual assault among women who were leaving the Orthodox fold.And yet it was she, Leah Vincent, who became the new star of the Footsteps organization. Her book readings and appearances were promoted ad nauseum by the organization. She was invited as honorary speaker at large annual events, and she was inducted into its boardroom.Meanwhile, Yisroel Stein, A formerly-hasidic man from the Vizhnitz hasidic sect who had left the community in 2013 was determined not to be upstaged by Vincent. He made a bombshell declaration in his blog that year: He was born in the wrong body. Not only was he and ought he be free to embark on a “second transition” into the feminine gender, but his body was in fact feminine all along; it was just misidentified at birth. That this was the same year that Caitlyn Jenner made her revelation was pure coincidence, of course.The newly christened female, Abby Stein, would become a star in the Footsteps world just as Caitlyn Jenner was in the mainstream. By then, Footsteppers had been indoctrinated into a new orthodoxy of how to properly behave among peers. The Yeshiva-mannerism-saturated boys club of 2009 was by then long passe. To be a hip member of the new club, Footsteppers had to be egalitarian; they had to affirm that genders were equal and capable of all things equally no matter what their disparate biologies would seem to indicate. The new victimhood culture and the unwavering acceptance of all complainers’ reports and their fancied perceptions of the world around them was firmly ensconced. When Abby announced her change in gender, what should have been a stunned, confounded audience instead was a blase, unconditionally-accepting, congratulatory one. The mazel tov’s were gushing in: “How brave of her to do so” was the motif. Footsteps, the organization, pulled out all the stops in promoting Abby Stein’s budding career – one that involved a publicity tour and speaking engagements across the liberal Jewish world and elsewhere.Last year, the “Mike New York” episode unfolded. Mike NY was a womanizer footstepper. He had a way of seducing women, some of whom later regretted it. When one particular woman, A.B., had buyer’s remorse over her anal intercourse experience with Mike the night before, she decided to go public with her gripe. She first posted it in a small Facebook “OTD sisterhood” group, to unanimous sympathy. She then changed the story and posted it to a much wider OTD group and she became an instant celebrity. The new story started with a statement of fact: “Mike NY raped me!” Hundreds of outraged OTD’ers –a monolithic, sanctimonious, deranged, virtuesignalling mob tripped over one another in expressing their indignation over the consummate evil of Mike NY. There were no questions asked, no corroboration of the account, no critical inquiry into the couple’s courtship. Mike NY was an evil monster and had to be punished swiftly and severely. By the time the thread was done spewing its vitriol, some even wondered how he was still on the loose, how had he not yet been arrested and prosecuted and imprisoned.The fury broadened to encompass Footsteps. How did Footsteps “allow” this to happen? Didn’t they know about Mike’s transgressions? Hadn’t people reported it to Footsteps? Why did they not take any action? How is he still a member? Isn’t there mandatory reporting to the police? Sure enough, within a few days, Mike’s Footsteps membership was abruptly terminated and the organization apologized to its members, promised to make amends, and to draw up newer, stricter guidelines on sexual interaction between members. It also offered psychological counseling for all the dainty souls who were triggered and traumatized by learning of the event. Mike attempted to vindicate himself by posting screenshots of the dialogue between him andA.B. in the days leading up to and during the alleged rape. The texts showed that A.B. had been flirtatious and cooperative not only prior but also after that fateful night. It was to no avail. Footsteps quickly removed his defensive posts, citing a “violation of privacy” –a privacy, however, that was only accorded to the accuser, not the accused. When The Forward later reported on the story, it revealed the identity of the accused, but not of the accuser.When One of Us came out last year (2017), Footsteps avidly promoted the film. The film, a Hollywood production true to form, hailed its three protagonists, all of who left the Ultraorthodox sector, as heroes. Without any questioning, elucidating, clarifying, giving background information, or even contextualizing, the film presents the plight of the protagonists as moving and real. “What can I do about this abuse?” is what the viewer is apt to think. But the effusive passions the film purports to elicit, are a house of cards. In point of fact, the protagonists were not abused, were not wronged, did not experience attempted assassination, and did not suffer from gross psychological damage stemming from molestation. Conveniently, the producers hinted at those evildoers in the haredi community, but did not provide sufficient details for the accusations that lay at the core of the narrative for them to be falsifiable. In other words, it was a sentimental ouvre extraordinaire, with little rational basis to substantiate it. It preyed on the masses’ basest instincts and emotional vulnerabilities to rivet the viewer and impart the message of “Haredim are abusers of women and children”.Another woman with whom Footsteps developed a very close partnership is Fraidy Reiss. She directs a social justice enterprise called Unchained at Last whose mission it is to expose to the world how prevalent underage and forced marriages are in the haredi world and elsewhere. The portrait she draws is of Hasidic women, specifically, (what good is a victimhood story if it doesn’t singularly focus on women, after all) being married off to men in the community against their will or at an age when they cannot yet give informed consent. This is a blatantly false portrayal. Anyone with even superficial knowledge of matchmaking in the community knows that the overwhelming majority of women (and men!) have no objection to their arranged marriages, do not express regret later in life, and are quite satisfied with their intra-communal matches –ones that are optimized for a slew of demographic factors that the engaging parties have in common and therefore have both a theoretical and empirical high rate of success. Oh, and there’s no underage marriage either.On the prosaic level –apart from its celebrity promotions– Footsteps came to adopt virtually all the newfangled Obama-era mores and attitudes toward sexuality, victimhood, offendedness, and egalitarianism. Following are some developmental parallels within Footsteps to that of the TitleIX-enhanced and trigger-protected campuses, in the ensuing years.1. Third-party complaints are encouraged by Footsteps, just like the Dear Colleague letters urged:If you experience or witness hostile or harassing conduct, you should contact Footsteps staff… If safe to do so, the person(s) who is the targeted subject, as well as any witness may also demand that the offenders stop the offensive conduct or communication.Poor, wretched, Footstepper victim. She is so victimized that she doesn’t even know it; she is incapable of recognizing her victimhood state. Not to worry, the good-samaritan prudes in the crowd who “witness” the wanton attack can score social brownie points by intervening on her behalf.2. Complainant is virtually always telling the truth. According to a Footsteps staff member, in reference to the Mike NY episode: “we believe the accuser”. This, even though, the accuser herself’s initial FB Sisterhood account did not describe an event that anyone would consider rape, nor one that she herself considered rape at that time.3. Girl is always right. Guy is always wrong. Girl is always the victim. Guy is the aggressor. No matter what. A male Footsteps member once recounted to an organizational officer that he was asked to leave a rural bar by a woman who felt uncomfortable baring her breasts to her acquaintances there in his presence, and asked whether this was appropriate. The Footsteps officer’s response was: “what was your body language that made this woman uncomfortable?” Another male Footstepper opines: “the religious view of the OTD feminist is that the women are always perfect and always victims and that men are evil and the aggressors”.4. Double standard. At a roundtable discussion between select Footsteppers, a particular male member remarked that “the environment in Footsteps is so toxic that I refrain from even considering asking anyone out”. To which a female member responded with a mischievous and dismissive chuckle: “that’s huey, we are so promiscuous here that I’ve slept with practically everyone”.5. Emotional reasoning: “I feel, therefore it is”. An extreme culture of agreeableness has come to dominate social group proceedings. Says one male Footstepper:“I’m not comfortable with…” is a common refrain. When someone on the computer overheard me and someone discussing transgenders in the military, he said “this conversation is making me uncomfortable”, thus shutting it down. There is a clear social pressure not to talk about certain things, and if you do, you’d better toe the party line. It used to be that anything was debatable: current events, politics, etc. Now, debates are no longer encouraged: don’t disagree too strongly, be accepting and supportive. When someone once spoke in a lilt that was redolent of yeshivish culture, one participant said “I’m not comfortable with this. It reminds me of my childhood”.I know people who stopped coming when they couldn’t discuss certain things. People are turned off by people not being able to speak their mind. Sexually suggestive language is prohibited. Jocular hitting on a girl is frowned upon, and report to staff is encouraged. It became a mental wellness group. I now go very infrequently to Footsteps because of this. To drop-in groups I don’t go at all. John [dummy name for a staff member] pushed back on this culture but wasn’t much successful. Saul [dummy name of different staff member] is not aware of this at all. He says he lets people express their opinions, not realizing that it’s all on the same side.The most sensitive [in the group] tend to be the loudest, and they stay the longest during the schmooze sessions… a lot of people who should be pushing back, don’t do so because they [men, who are less secularly-educated than women] can’t speak English.6. The fostering of a more feminine, cooperative, sugarcoated, supportive environment. According to reports, one particular staff member explicitly said that she wants to make Footsteps a more “feminist” place. When a man who was invited to emcee an event declined the invite citing the organization’s fostering of a male-hostile environment, the staff member wrote apathetically in an email message:I appreciate your explanation. If there was anything you think staff could be doing better, please let me know. If your feeling like Footsteps isn’t the space for you now- that’s also fair. But we do miss your presence here.7. Many rank and file Footsteppers now naively subscribe to the newly devised doctrine of affirmative consent. Although the standard is comically ludicrous and has never been tried in any society in space or time other than our own in our own time, some members have now been inculcated with the new orthodoxy. They believe that the Mike NY episode could have been averted if only Mike had prompted at every step of the intercourse with: “may I penetrate you now?”, “may I go an inch deeper?”, “may I continue for another minute”.8. Conflation of unwanted with opposed. The Mike NY episode amply demonstrated how this conflation had taken hold. Even though it was as clear as day, by the woman’s own undisputed account, that the coitus and sodomy that she had experienced was by consent, the mob was livid with him. How could he have known that the woman would later regret it? How could he have possibly acted otherwise? It didn’t matter! If it’s unwanted, now or later, or even if it’s only quasi-wanted, then it’s rape; even if there’s no outward sign of the unwantedness and no way for the man to read the woman’s thoughts.Footsteps Application prompts for nonconventional genders and preferred pronounBut at that point in Footsteps’ perverse evolution it was hard to know which came first, the chicken or the egg. By 2015 the organization had become permeated by third-wave feminism, victimhood-mongering, transgenderism, and lesbianism –so much so that straight men were no longer attending events or playing a central role in them. Says one male ex-member:I would go to this [Footsteps-sponsored club] event, and there were like fifty people there. The music starts and eight lesbian women with tattoos and piercings would start dancing in the middle, along with two or three others who were straight. The vibe is just not there; I can’t get myself to dance along. I love these people, and I wish them all the best, but I felt like I was the only one not lesbian. Ever been to a gay club?… A ratio of 51% [straight]-49% [gay] might still be a challenge, but one that could be overcome. When it’s 80-20 LGBTQ vibe, I can’t do it.The organization had never bothered to teach women how to be comfortable in accepting the advances of men. It had never exerted the slightest of efforts to coach men –ones from haredi backgrounds who have never interacted with feamles in their entire lives– on how to approach women. But by 2017 it became a lot worse. Decade-old “sexuality workshops” were of the precautionary caliber: they taught women to use protection, they taught men that they must ensure that women were receptive to their advances before proceeding, etc. Now the lectures were teaching the alphabet soup of new genders out there: what’s the difference between queer and lesbian? How do you know whether you’re straight or gay? What are your choices if you believe your assigned gender does not correspond to your “real” gender.Footsteps application accommodates folk who fancy themselves having a last name other than what they actually have.Indeed, while condoms have been a prominent fixture at “the space” since the organization’s inception, they are hardly ever put to use. According to the estimation of a professional dating expert who is familiar with the Footsteps demographic, 70% of the [straight] Footsteps membership never gets laid at all:Footsteppers go to school (often sponsored or subsidized by the organization) spend there all day, but don’t talk to anyone. I won’t be shocked if 60-70% of members are completely out of the dating world. The ones who do date, date down, because they don’t have the necessary courtship skills [to be able to attract and sustain relationships with folks from their own league].“How did the organization lose its focus?” –he wonders:Hypothetically, if 60% of Footsteppers had an eating disorder, would the organization start pushing eating disorder remediation as its dominant message? Perhaps it would be appropriate to allocate some portion of its budget for something that so many of its members have in common, but certainly not the lion’s share. There are a gazillion LGBTQ organizations out there in New York. It’s all great. But that’s not the mission of the organization. When Yankel Haimovitsch who doubts his haredi religious tenets comes knocking on Footsteps’ door for help, the first thing he encounters is transgenders, lesbians, and Abby Stein, and encounters the jarring “they” pronoun. He is daunted. Maybe seven years down the road, that would be fine with him, or maybe not. But right then and there it’s way too overwhelming and alien for him. Even “One of Us” that the organization is assiduously promoting –what did it do? how does it help me and you? It generates lots of donations cuz people feel bad, but it doesn’t help the constituency.Straying from the Mission“Art”, and similar subjective fluff is big business at Footsteps. Objectivity and substantive help is hard to find.Critics point out that Footsteps has never strayed as far afield from its mission as it currently has. It does very little to help its members assimilate into mainstream society –its purported mission. Only a puny portion of it is roughly two-million-dollar budget is earmarked toward helping members. After paying for its bloated staff, its fancy office buildings, and the periodic hiring of semi-famous professors or writers to give lectures on irrelevant topics, not much meat is left onthe bones for actually helping members, and from the portion that does go toward that, much of it is college scholarship grants or summer intern grants.What new members desperately need the most are:• A listening ear, a shoulder to lean on, and wise counsel. They need someone who “gets” them, has a deep understanding of their predicament, and is capable of advising them and helping them sort through the dizzying array of choices that freedom enables. What a member is apt to get instead is a referral to one of dozens of organizations that Footsteps has developed working relationships with, and –at best– the consultation of a professional paper-pushing “social worker” who is not conversant with the challenges of fresh haredi departees and is, at any rate, pledged to an ethos of never telling a client what to do or even hinting at such. • A home. They may need a place to stay in case they feel that they are being expelled from home, or if they feel the need for temporary breathing space from the rigid circumscribed ultra-orthodoxy of their home. Footsteps has steadfastly refused to budge on this. No housing!Along with Abby Stein, Abortion is now a core tenet of Footsteps Orthodoxy• Gainful employment. They need jobs, far more than they need, or could benefit from, a formal education (viz., a four-year college diploma that is nowadays useless anyway). They need financial independence above all else in life. They don’t need scholarships or exploitive internships. Footsteppers are not lazy and not stupid, but after forfeiting their social networks they need new ones in order to build up the trust and connections that typically lead to successful jobs. Footsteps could be doing this, but it’s too busy explaining to its members the difference between transitioning from male to female and female to male, and the distinction between cisgender and transgender, to have time left for anything else. • Lastly and most importantly: they need mates. This is the elephant in the room. Footsteps tenaciously refuses to even acknowledge that this is a challenge, let alone do anything about it. In the sexually hypercharged era we live in, perhaps the organizationfears that it may say something wrong and be accused of something. But by ignoring the most pressing desire of its new members, both men and women, it is rendering itself superfluous even as it could be immensely helpful. There are no coaching sessions on appropriate courtship methods. No counseling on appropriate venues to find mates. No discussion of factors that have been proven scientifically to increase the likelihood of successful long-term relationships and marriages. Nothing. An eerie silence has pervaded “the space” on all such matters, from the organization’s inception unto this day.Multiple people interviewed for this article report that they have contacted Footsteps’ leadership to voice their concern about the organization’s ill-directed, errant path. The response they get is something along the lines of the oh-so-polite “oh yeah, we hear you, you make a strong point and we value your feedback. We’ll study the matter and see what we can do”. But nothing gets done.Critics speculate as to the institutional incentives for this radical, irrational, and alienating, leftism; and the misguided channeling of the organization’s resources. One astute analyst observes:My feeling is that it has a lot to do with money. The organization thinks it’s good PR to demonstrate LGBTQ sensitivity, it gives them access to funds. It’s also a very easy choice: talk about empowerment of women, about why some men want to be treated like women, etc. –you can’t be criticized for it. It’s safe. Very PC. Alternatively, they can teach women how to be comfortable around men, teach men how to go about dating, and it’s a minefield. What if something goes wrong? It’s a lot easier and incontrovertible to teach a chef the safety rules while cooking, than teaching him how to cook… they’ll do lots on education, cuz it’s easy, but they are risk-averse. It’s a huge monstrosity of an organization. Their goal is not to make mistakes.What is one to do?There are currently two alternatives to Footsteps, both considerably more modest in organizational complexity, and both content in exposing haredi applicants to acculturation and modernism without the extreme leftism and secularism of Footsteps.• Project Makom The organization’s declared mission is to help haredi people transition to a Modern Orthodox environment, not a secular one. However, Modern Orthodoxy is a logical way station toward secularism, and so its services are likely to be helpful even to those who seek to secularize completely. Moreover, few would-be OTD’ers/Footsteppers know in advance with absolute certainty that utter secularism is their optimal path in life. A beneficiary could accept the organization’s help in good conscience inasmuch as it isn’t known for sure in a transition’s early stages that the ultimate destination is complete irreligiosity. • Project Acheinu by PHS

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