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Jewish people are vulnerable ethnic minorities who look different and have been historically excluded and marginalized for this very reason. That is, we are “people of colour.”Italians and East Europeans are European ethnic groups. Italy is in Southern Europe. Ukraine, Romania, Georgia, etc. are in Eastern Europe. Of course, some Italians and Russians are Jews. They were discriminated against regularly, subject to pogroms, and in the case of Italian Jews - the entire community destroyed in the Holocaust. Primo Levi wrote about this, and other matters relating to the Italian Jewish experience. Italian Jews and Russian Jews are POC. But, Italians and Russians generally are white Europeans.ORIGINSNow the term “coloured” originated as a way to respectfully refer to African-Americans. In the 19th century, imagine you were a white baker working with a black cook, or a white abolitionist working with a black abolitionist. Would you want to use slurs and other offensive language to refer to your colleague? No, of course not. That would be counterproductive. The African-American community - i.e., mostly West and Central Africans, in the U.S. diaspora - debated which terms they preferred.Additionally, enslaved labourers in the American South (and presumably North) co-opted some of the abusive language employed to oppress them; a phenomena which stretches into the modern era, with, for instance, rap music. Eugene Genovese discusses this phenomenon in his groundbreaking historical work “Roll, Jordan, Roll.”Some free blacks and freepeople preferred the term “coloured”, others preferred other language. Later the choices expanded to include “Ethiopian”, “black”, “African American” to give a sampling during the era of the Harlem Renaissance - 1920s-30s. The ancient Greeks confusingly used “Ethiopian” to refer to all black people - this habit apparently persisted, with the Brits naming a black loyalist regiment the Ethiopian Royalist Regiment. This may be why the African American community considered, but rejected “Ethiopian” as the word of preference.This usage is in Shakespeare as well: Romeo describes Juliet as an iridescent earring set against an “Ethiop’s ear” (R and J).) Apparently to Romeo, Juliet looks like a pearl worn by a black woman. Which makes one wonder if Shakespeare is implying she is either very dark (glowingly dark) or very pale (glowingly pale).The transition to the common use of the term “African-American” occurred gradually, and not without resistance and debate. Here is an excerpt from a 1989 article on the subject in The New York Times. There were many choices, and hardly consensus.Mr. Wilkins's feelings are not shared by all. Skeptics, many of them older blacks who have lived through previous name changes, are resisting the move. Some say they do not identify with Africa and resent prominent blacks telling them what to be called. Others fear that the debate over a new name draws attention away from problems like unemployment and drug abuse.'African-American' Favored By Many of America's BlacksThe question of a name has caused pain and controversy since the first Africans were captured and shipped to the Americas in the 17th century. The slaves called themselves Africans at first, but slave masters gave them English names and called them Negroes, the Portuguese word for black, historians say. That term was resented by some blacks who said it was degrading when whites mispronounced it, accidentally or intentionally.The term African-American has had several incarnations in previous years, with ''Afro-American'' having spurts of popularity since the late 19th century and particularly in the 1960's. But supporters of the current movement find fault with that usage. ''We came from Africa,'' said Dr. Olive Taylor, a professor of history at Howard University. ''We didn't come from 'Afro.' ''Arthur Ashe decided to use the term in his new book, ''A Hard Road to Glory: A History of the African-American Athlete,'' published late last year by Amistad-Warner. ''It was given a great deal of thought; it was definitely not going to be 'black,' '' the tennis player said. '' 'African-American' is much more appropriate and correct than 'Afro-American' or 'black' or any other alternative. And I didn't want to leave the wrong impression with something so permanent as a book.''….But not for everyone. ''When did they take a vote on what blacks wanted to be called?'' C. Hutherson, a black Chicagoan, asked in a letter to The Chicago Sun-Times. ''They must have done it while I was asleep. Jesse Jackson and other black leaders have a lot of nerve speaking for all blacks.'' 'I Want to Stay Black'In a recent discussion in Eva Brown's sophomore history class at Chicago's Kenmore Academy, several students were suspicious of the term. ''I want to stay black,'' said Madonna Cliff, who is 16 years old.Nor should blacks see changing a name as a panacea, many say. ''This doesn't mean that everything will be wonderful and all the poor people will get taken care of,'' said Mary Frances Berry, a professor of history at the University of Pennsylvania who is a member of United States Civil Rights Commission.'African-American' Favored By Many of America's BlacksThe article also raises other questions. How do people such as a news reporter mentioned in the story with a “dark complexion and Hispanic surname” decide to identify in this new context? The article notes she and her professional community of colleagues and coworkers settled on “African-Latino.” This whole business of names and language is actually much more complicated than it initially seems.Being that my lineage is Afro-Latina and African American and Irish, I tend to use the terms “black” or “brown” when referring to myself. When I use the term “women of color” I tend to do so with the idea of honoring women of primarily African dissent but it is a term that can include women of all black, brown and olive or other skin tones and diverse heritages and backgrounds.PilarDoes it make a difference if you’re called black, African-American, melanated or any other term?Black. African-American feels like I’m being singled out as an immigrant. White Americans don’t get their countries of origin tagged to them with their nationaliy, so I refuse. People are afraid of black, black offends them. Deal with me being accepted as a black and strong as I stand in front of you.Allen CollinsI prefer to be called black. I do not and cannot identify with my African heritage because I am (sadly) so far removed. If I had one eye, I’d be called a Cyclops. When they see me, the first thing they notice is my skin color. Call me what you see so I can know how you identify me.Jelani3 years agoI like being called Black or African American. Either one can be used offensively depending on who says it & how they say it. It would be great if we could all be thought of as equals but we are not quite there yet. We need to accept who we are & not allow anyone to disrespect us or treat us unfairly. I think it is sad when Black people are ashamed of being Black. Everyone should be proud of who they are & be the best person they can be.Tracy Carr3 years agoThe comments are almost uniformly intended to signal the writers’ virtue. The fact of the matter is that there are different races and it’s futile to ignore them. Adverse discrimination must be condemned, but there’s nothing wrong with recognizing reality. How many times do people struggle pathetically to make themselves understood? “Who won the contest?” “That guy. You know … the one who often wears brown shoes? You know …. the one who was at that party last week. Ummm … the guy who [yadda yadda]….” “You mean the black guy?” “Right.”Rosalind Gig3 years agoI heard someone once tell their children that if you have to provide a description of someone, don’t use their race type as a characteristic. It’s a beautiful lesson for everyone. It makes you go way beyond the surface and links experiences to character.Call me by my name CurtCurtSo that’s the origin of the term POC. African Americans wanted a respectful language through which to voice their identity or identities. Eventually, the term POC shifted to “African American” or “black” or “black American”, etc.Now for the original question. Italians are a European ethnic group. This applies to Southern Italians and Northern Italians. It’s true that Southern Italians face some bigotry in Italy and that Italians in America were lynched - this is how we got Columbus Day. The Italian government and Italian Americans lobbied for it. East Europeans, Irish, Greeks are also European ethnic groups. BTW, Scandinavians started the Russian empire - and in Ukraine, not Russia. (So Ukrainians basically created Russian culture. Sorry Putin. The facts are the facts.) Irish and Italians, despite their European-ness, faced racism in the U.S. Irish were also oppressed brutally by the British Empire, a factor that connected with the brands of racism that come out of American history. Many of the tropes surrounding Irish - such as that they were “savages” who needed to be controlled and coerced from afar - applied to Americans, and to African Americans, specifically, from the perspective of the Empire. In the South, and to a lesser extent the North, slavers and professional kidnappers, called slave traders, applied the same language to African Americans. The British racial stereotypes about Irish were transplanted to North America, modified, and transformed into a new set of fresh racist rhetoric - centring on the supposed weaknesses of Africans and African Americans. This is part of the system that inspired chattel slavery and the legacy of the transatlantic slave trade. As well as the horrors of the Middle Passage.CUT to….But Irish people were none too happy about their situation as a small colonial outpost of the Empire. Many immigrated to America, serving in both the Revolutionary and Civil Wars. The Irish potato famine devastated the small European nation. The Navajo nation, an indigenous North American nation, helped them. Irish Americans are raising funds to help Navajo communities with the pandemic right now as a gesture of thank-you. America introduced participatory democracy, and gross Fourth of July snack food, to the Irish immigrants. And - as ideas of self-rule so often do, much to the dismay of empires - eventually these ideas caught on in Ireland. This is a long story and beyond the scope of this essay. Eventually, however, the Irish rebelled in what is known as “The Easter Rising.” The British repressed the rebellion with ruthless methods, which swayed public opinion in favour of the rebels, which, eventually, resulted in an Independent Ireland.Back to the U.S.: Irish and Italians initially viewed each other as fierce rivals and even, often, enemies. They competed for jobs and housing. Both were looked at as foreigners, despite their European ethnicity. Italians sometimes had to sit behind a barrier at Catholic services; Italians also indulged in their own share of racism and xenophobia regarding the Irish. Despite the fact that most shared Catholic faith, which marked them as “other” in the eyes of upper-class American society, they struggled to get along. Eventually, they intermarried and these old rivalries disappeared. The popular Hollywood movie “Brooklyn” starring Saoirse Ronan depicts this dynamic. Although subject to a degree of racism - perhaps “ethnic bias” fits better - in North America, most Italians and Irish assimilated into the mainstream of white European society quickly. Irish immigrants did not even need to learn a new language. Both groups are European ethnicities, so white supremacists had little interest in targeting them. Most nativist sentiment stemmed from just the fact that they were immigrants, and/or the Catholicism they brought.Similarities/Differences between the Irish-American and Italian-American Experiences, and POCIrish indentured servants often laboured alongside African American enslaved labourers, and, since their contracts could be arbitrarily extended, were in many ways in a similar situation as an enslaved labourer. But white slavery ended extremely quickly, especially after the Revolution - after which any kind of slavery in the North became increasingly uncommon. Irish and Italians faced problems assimilating, but not because of ethnic differences - more due to national and cultural ones. And, while the lynchings of Italian Americans were hate crimes and very extreme, they eventually stopped. These lynchings represented relatively isolated incidents in contrast to the more regular domestic terror visited on say, blacks or Jews by the Klan (burning synagogues, burning crosses, lynchings, shootings, mass shootings, etc.). It isn’t that there was no racism experienced by Irish or Italians, but not in the same way as groups not ethnically European. Of course Italian Jews and Irish Jews also face antisemitism and anti-Jewish racism, but that is a separate issue.Italians were never forced into servitude in the US as Irishmen and -women were. Eventually, like the Irish, they too assimilated as the two communities intermarried and forgot old rivalries. And thus moved closer to the centre of European and Euro-American culture. For more on this, read “Irish and Italians: a Love/Hate Story” by Paul Moses.FURTHER EXPLANATIONItalians, Irish and Eastern Europeans are not referred to as “people of colour” because they usually do not face systemic discrimination on account of ethnic background. Even when they do, it is not in the extreme form of domestic terror attacks on fellow-citizens, e.g., the domestic terror attack on an Episcopalian church in Charleston or the domestic terror attack on the Philadelphia Jewish agency HIA. And because of this, the term “people of colour” is generally not used with regard to Italians or Irish or Eastern Europeans. I’m assuming OP means ethnic Europeans, not say, Italian Jews, or black Irishmen and -women, or Irish Jews. People whose ethnic roots are in Europe.Italians and Irish did face considerable racial discrimination but it eventually mostly subsided. In the case of the Irish this is partly due to transplanted British colonial dynamics of power and ways of understanding the concept of “race”. For Italians it has to do with their Catholicism, and just the fact that lots of working-class people were suddenly coming to the US speaking with previously unheard-of accents. But now the cultural anxieties linked to Irish and Italian immigration have undergone a shift. Instead of targeting and demonizing Irish and Italian immigration, reactionary conservatives want to punish Mexicans, Syrians, Yazidis, and Middle Eastern Christians, as well as other groups - often from Central and Latin America. Of course, the barbaric rhetoric of the Trump administration frightens all immigrant groups - I can testify that my Georgian stepmother and Ukrainian friend are none too happy about his bizarre and criminal policies. But the racism employed by his supporters is generally directed at other groups. Groups that get white supremacists riled up. Arab Christians facing brutal persecution, Mexicans struggling to escape gang warfare, Syrians coping with a horrific civil war….this is who his rhetoric targets. (So a lesson for American Catholics: Study American history and know your own history before voting for Trump!)Jews are referred to as “persons of colour” becauseWe are often of olive or brown skinWe look identifiably “different.” If you grew up in a large metropolitan area with a large Jewish community, such as NYC, my hometown, you notice that Jews look different from say, the average fellow-citizen. Or the average white person. Of course, some Jews could pass for Europeans and vice versa; but if you live in a large metropolis with a large Jewish population, it becomes clear how to identify a Jewish person at sight. Jews have certain facial features, hair textures, and an overall look as well as identifying cultural signifiers (yarmulke hats; teischel; star of David; hamsa; and more). Once a close friend was bullied for looking too stereotypically Jewish - she has the classic features and dark curly hair. She later moved to Israel, where she could revel in her Jewish identity openly and show Jewish pride with no fear.We are ethnic minorities in America and not white. And we are targeted and oppressed by white supremacists. In fact hate crimes against Jews are most common. Five people stabbed during a Hanukkah celebration in Monsey, New York. Four killed in a shooting at a Jersey City grocery store. A Brooklyn woman hit in the head as she walked with her child.The rash of anti-Semitic attacks gripping the New York-New Jersey area may feel like chilling coincidences, but statistics show they’re part of a wave of anti-Semitic violence that has risen across the country over the past half-decade.In 2014, 609 anti-Jewish hate crime incidents were reported to the FBI. By 2018, the most recent year for which statistics are publicly available, that number had increased nearly 40 percent, to 835 incidents.Anti-Semitic hate crimes hit a seven-year high in 2017, fueled in part by an Israeli American man who called in waves of bomb threats against Jewish community centers across the country. It’s not just New York: Anti-Jewish attacks are part of a wave of 'more violent' hate crimesSo it makes sense to apply the language “POC” to Jews. While the term is not really appropriate for white Americans. They might face discrimination, but not in the same structural and institutional level. The U.S. likes to pretend we have no issues with antisemitism and anti-Jewish racism. So does Canada. That this is a solely Europe based phenomena. Yes, antisemitism is in Europe; but as to how this excuses American antisemitism, whether on left or right, there’s no adequate answer to that. U.S. and Canada aren’t necessarily better - or not by as much as we would like to think, sadly. “POC” really evolved as a way of speaking respectfully about African Americans, but it caught on and spread to include Chinese Americans, Latinx Americans, Native Americans, Jewish Americans, Arab Americans, Japanese Americans…I hope this is becoming clear.The left and especially hard left likes to ignore and sugarcoat antisemitism, usually by gaslighting racial abuse or violence survivors. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. We are Asian Americans (West Asian). We face a ton of racial, religious, cultural, and just plain crazy hate. And it is sadly only growing. Still. This is not - now - the Irish and Italian experience in the US.My father’s answer to:Why was the US so eager to allow a lot of Catholics to move to the US given the widespread anti-Catholic sentiment in the US?It wasn’t eager to allow Catholics to enter. It was just that the US needed people to populate a vast country and staff a growing industrial base and Catholics at that time tended to be poorer and more desperate than Protestants and more willing to work in coal mines and make risky bets on agriculture in forbidding places. Even so, Catholics faced a lot of discrimination and the open door policy only lasted until 1924 when most Catholics were more or less banned by immigration policies. So, they escaped the fate of the Chinese, who were more deeply discriminated against and had the door closed nearly shut in 1881. For Catholics the quasi-tolerance lasted a few more decades. All in all it is a good lesson for American Catholics and Asian Americans: understand your history before voting for Donald Trump!Here abuse survivor, activist, and political leader speaks about the gaslighting and racial abuse she faced. Scene is in Britain, but these problems are common to US and Canada.Hope that helps explain some of the facts on the ground. If you want to learn more about these issues, I recommend reading a book or two or three on antisemitism and historical anti-Jewish racism in North America. And then pick up many, many more.

Most companies use computers that track inbound and outbound quantities. Then you as an inventory guru can do daily cycle counts and physically count actual numbers usually with bar code scanner gun. Pareto’s Law is that your top 20% of items do 80% of your business. So save the odd ball stuff for month end. When you download this information a variance pops up either over or under. If it doesn’t match the actual count. At this point you double check the count and look for errors of similar sku’s and possible coincidences of human error while counting or inputing data. In the example of a beer distributors are you over on Budweiser and under on Bud Light by the same margin? Investigate the patterns for human error look at breakage, damages, on truck status, loading issues, promotional samples, look at outbound receipts, check the video surveillance for hard to move items like kegs. See when things arrived by date code? Was the full amount received? Check all invoices, sales numbers, and let the investigation begin to chase the count. Weirdly sometimes it pendulum swings back the next day, week, or month, because a physical count is all about timing like a snap shot or photograph, or blood test. The warehouse doesn’t stop just because you are counting unless it is a major end of quarter or year end count. Hopefully you’ll have a Lil Joe, like I did, slowing down the forks and sending guys for union coffee breaks while you try to see the blended pallet breaks as you squeeze down long rows of pyramid beer and will help you out slowing down warehouse operations intentionally. Eventually you can add your own system of symbols and write on the shrink wrap in marker without having to deal with tagging everything or always counting in the same system. Be aware of freshness dating and know what aisle they are pulling from and receiving into. Use post it notes to your advantage so you don’t always have to count every aisle. Mark off the warehouse in virtual spaces to narrow down your search pattern when you are back in the catwalk. Yell at your boss Chrissy for stealing from his father when all you demand is a post it note with what beer he is taking because as the owner he should be able to take anything as long as you aren’t chasing variance ghosts. Chris don’t be millionaire baby and give me a post it note so your father can have the best inventory count you can have and Newark Budweiser plant can plan the requirements of Brooklyn, NY. I wasn’t the best but I ranked 2nd in NYC in consecutive years over 33 other Budweiser Distributorships and Beck’s North America wrote me a letter of commendation for inventory excellence. Trade daily for your out of stocks with your allied partners like morning card game and enjoy your time in NYC.

You’ve come to the right place! This has been something of a hobby of mine for many, many years. Here is a sampling of the best:1. McDonald v. Scripps-Howard Newspapers — Twelve year-old Gavin McDonald (acting through his parents) filed a lawsuit against the newspaper syndicate that sponsored a spelling bee. Gavin’s “legal theory” was that he should be named the winner of the contest because another boy, who had mistakenly been disqualified earlier, was allowed to participate, and when Gaven misspelled a word, this was the boy who won. The opening line of the court opinion says it all: “Question: When should a lawyer say ‘No’ to a client? Answer: When asked to file a lawsuit like this one.”2. Lodi v. Lodi — Arguably the creator of a whole, very small class of lawsuits: Oreste Lodi filed a lawsuit against himself. He had the papers served on himself and, when he didn’t answer his own lawsuit, tried to have a default judgment taken against himself. The judge caught the oddness of the request and dismissed the lawsuit instead. So Lodi appealed — and the California court of appeal actually published the decision. The place where the respective attorneys for both sides are normally listed near the beginning of the appellate opinion instead has a single line: “Oreste Lodi for Plaintiff and Appellant and Defendant and Respondent.” (The lawsuit was apparently some kind of scheme to convince the IRS that he had been sued for everything he was worth, and therefore had no assets that could be garnished. Or something.)3. Harris v. Time, Inc. — Another California case (Why is it always California? Hard to say. California is to loony lawsuits what Florida is to everything else.) Back in 1985, little 3 year-old Joshua Gnaizda got a soliciation from Time magazine that said on the outside of the envelope, “Joshua Gnaizda, if you open this envelope, we’ll give you a free watch!” But inside the envelope, there was, in fact no free watch. The watch was only “free” if you ordered a subscription to Time magazine. Joshua’s father (who recently passed away) was a prominent public interest attorney, and instead filed a multi-million dollar class action lawsuit against Time for having “defrauded” the public. The court of appeal was not amused.4. Riss v. City of New York — Back in the 1950s, Linda Riss was an attractive young woman who had spurned a suitor named Burt Pugach. Riss was nearly blinded, and badly disfigured, when Pugach hired a thug to throw lye in her face. Pugach got a lengthy prison sentence and Riss sued the City of New York for failing to protect her. The highest court of New York eventually upheld the dismissal of her lawsuit, 4-3, ruling that the police cannot be sued for failing to protect a crime victim if they merely take a report of the crime. The story has a happy ending, though — when Pugach got out of prison, he and Riss got married.5. Miles v. City Council of Augusta, Georgia — A heartwarming tale (sort of) about a couple who owned a “talking cat” named Blackie. Blackie allegeldy would meow "I love you" or "I want my Mama" to people on the street, and his owners, an otherwise unemployed couple, encouraged people to “donate” a dollar for the privilege of hearing him talk. The city claimed that their solicitation of money for their talking feline was a “business occupation” and that they needed to pay the city for a license — just like, say, a pushcart vendor. They got the license but then sued the city, and the case made it all the way to the federal appeals court. (Spoiler: The Miles couple lost.)6. Mayo v. Satan and His Staff — Mayo was a prisoner in the lock-up in Erie, Pennsylvania, and sued Satan (the horns-and-a-tail fellow) for having led him astray and into a life of crime. The federal appeals court dismissed the lawsuit on the odd ground that the defendant could not demonstrate that Satan was domiciled in that federal court district in order to serve him with the papers. (The “Staff,” incidentally, appears to have referred to Satan’s band of evil minions, and not a big stick of some kind.)7. Brown v. State — Not so much a weird case, per se, but interesting because of the opinion itself. The defendant in a Georgia felony case claimed he had a defense witness who was unavailable. The trial judge refused to grant a continuance, so, the trial went forward, and the defendant was convicted. The defendant appealed, and the appellate court’s opinion reads, in part: “The D. A. was ready/His case was red-hot./Defendant was present,/His witness was not.He prayed one day's delay/From His honor the judge./But his plea was not granted/The Court would not budge.So the jury was empanelled/All twelve good and true/But without his main witness/What could the twelve do?”It goes on like that for 18 stanzas, with less important things like the facts of the case and the law that the appellate court relied upon in footnotes. One of them explains that, “This opinion is placed in rhyme because approximately one year ago, in Savannah at a very convivial celebration, the distinguished Judge Dunbar Harrison, Senior Judge of Chatham Superior Courts, arose and addressed those assembled, and demanded that if Judge Randall Evans, Jr. ever again was so presumptuous as to reverse one of his decisions, that the opinion be written in poetry.” So the next time Judge Evans (the author of the doggerel above) in fact had to reverse Judge Harrison, he came up with . . . whatever that is, above.8. Fisher v. Lowe — While I’m on the subject of court opinions written in rhyme, in 1983 the Michigan Court of Appeal had a case come before it in which a man skidded off a road and damaged the oak tree on a nearby property. The owner sued the driver. Michigan, however, has a strict no-fault insurance law, which does not permit recovery of damage to real property by an automobile. This “inspired” Judge John Gillis to write what is almost certainly the best of such “poetic opinions,” which (minus the footnotes, which once again have the tiresome stuff, like “facts” and “law”), in its entirety, is this homage to Joyce Kilmer’s Trees:“We thought that we would never seeA suit to compensate a tree.A suit whose claim in tort is prestUpon a mangled tree's behest;A tree whose battered trunk was prestAgainst a Chevy's crumpled crest;A tree that faces each new dayWith bark and limb in disarray;A tree that may forever bearA lasting need for tender care.Flora lovers though we three,We must uphold the court's decree.Affirmed.”The folks who publish the law books you see in law libraries were so impressed by this that they, too, even wrote the case headnotes in rhyme.9. Leonard v. Pepsico — No account of bizzaro court cases would be complete without this 1999 federal court case, arising from a promotion run by Pepsi back in the ’90s. Consumers could collect “Pepsi Points” that were redeemable for merchandise like hats, sunglasses, beach towels, etc. Buried in the fine print was a provision that if you submitted 10% of the necessary points in cash, plus at least 15 points (printed on bottle caps, cardboard drink can packaging, etc.) you could get the items without collecting enough points.The lawsuit arose when Pepsi did a TV commercial that showed a Harrier jet landing on a lawn, with the phrase “Harrier Jet — 7,000,000 points.” So a fellow named John Leonard somehow got a number of folks to pledge a total of $70,000, which he submitted along with 15 points to Pepsi and said, “Where’s my Harrier?” Pepsi responded with a letter claiming that the commercial was just hyperbole. Leonard sued. The court of appeal agreed with Pepsi that its TV commercial could not reasonably be taken as an “offer” for a Harrier jet for Pepsi points.But in the meantime, just to be sure, Pepsi modified its commercials to say, “Harrier Jet — 700,000,000 points,” presumably to discourage the John Leonards of the world from offering $70,000,000 plus 15 Pepsi points. I mean, heck, for that kind of money, you could buy, I dunno, your own fighter jet.10. Hormel Foods v. Jim Henson Productions. Or as I like to call it, “SPAM versus the Muppets.” Back in 1997, Henson’s production company produced a movie called Muppet Treasure Island. One of the minor characters was a pig — well, actually a boar — named “Spa’am,” pronounced as if you hiccuped right as you were saying his name. Hormel foods sued Henson Productions claiming that the Spa’am character — and I’m not making this up — damaged the “good name” of SPAM. The court of appeal wrote an amusing opinion, noting that Hormel should have been inured to people making fun of its signature gelatinous product, and should even have been honored that (for once) it was associated with an actual source of pork.No word on whether Hormel has sued anyone over the association of its product with trillions of unwanted e-mails.11. White v. Samsung Electronics America — In the early 1990s, Samsung had a series of television commercials humorously suggesting how various then-current trends might play out in the future. One of them showed an otherwise faceless gold robot wearing a blond wig turning letters, with the caption, “Most popular game show, 2050.” Vanna White sued, claiming that the commercials infringed upon her “image.” And unlike in the Pepsi case, she won! This was apparently confirmation that her “image” is that she is a “blond robot.” C’mon, Vanna — did you really want to point that out?12. Trustees of Columbia University v. Jacobsen — back in the 1950s, Mr. Jacobsen attended Columbia and later dropped out. He then sued the school for failing to impart wisdom and knowledge, as stated (among other places) on its emblem. Well, he certainly demonstrated that, didn’t he? Case dismissed.13. Dickens v. Debolt — Dickens was a fisherman, who caught a large legal sturgeon at a legal time of day. Having no way to clean the fish, he left it in the water tied with a rope. Later that day, at a time when it would have been illegal to fish, DeBolt, a fish and game warden, showed up and seized the fish, citing some other (uninvolved) nearby fishermen who were camping on the scene. Dickens sued the State for the valued of his wrongfully-seized fish. When DeBolt showed up in court, all the evidence he could produce was an eight-pound block that he had cleaned and frozen. Other testimony showed that a sturgeon of the size Dickens had caught should have yielded about 40 lbs. of cleaned fish, suggesting that DeBolt may well have eaten the rest of the evidence. Judgment for Dickens in the amount of several hundred dollars.14. Stambovsky v. Ackley — Stambovsky bought a home from Helen Ackley in Nyack, New York (up the Hudson from NYC). After he moved in, he discovered “to his horror” (as the court later put it) that Ackley had for years advertised this as her “haunted house on the Hudson,” even going so far as to publicize this in an article in Reader’s Digest in 1977. Stambovsky sued to rescind the purchase. Although New York has a fairly strict “Let the buyer beware” rule for home purchases, the appellate court ruled for Stambovsky, with lots of lines like the buyer normally “hasn’t a ghost of a chance,” but that the court was moved “by the spirit of equity” to rule for Stambovsky. Most interestingly, the court held that because Ackley had tirelessly advertised that her house was beset with a poltergeist, she could not deny this and therefore the house was haunted “as a matter of law.”15. Velasco v. Commercial Building Maintenance Co. — Velasco and his son were injured when a glass bottle soda bottle exploded, striking them with broken glass. They hired a lawyer, who left the pieces of the broken bottle in a paper bag on his desk. That night, the building’s janitorial service found a paper bag filled with broken glass (not otherwise labeled) on the lawyer’s desk, assumed it was trash, and discarded it. The Velascos sued the custodial company for what might be called “janitorial malpractice.” The court of appeal was not impressed with the argument. But don’t feel bad for the Velascos — their next lawsuit was presumably for legal malpractice, for leaving crucial evidence on a desk without labeling it, or putting it somewhere safe.16. Jordache Enterprises v. Hogg Wyld, Inc. — Jordache, once a leading retailer of jeans, sued two women who created a sort-of knock-off called Lardashe (its emblem showed a pig sticking its head over the pocket, as though “peeking out”). They claimed that there was no attempt to associate their brand’s name with “Jordache,” although some of the other names for their product that they had kicked around before settling on “Lardashe” (“Wiseashe” depicting an owl, or “Dumbashe” with a picture of a donkey) seemed to suggest the origins of the name pretty clearly. Nevertheless, the court ruled in favor of Hogg Wyld” (which had since changed its name to “Oink, Inc.”), finding that their name, although clearly derived from “Jordache,” was a parody, and as in copyright law, there was no infringement as long as there was no realistic likelihood of confusing the consumer.The court ended its opinion with this quotation from Lewis Carroll: “If it had grown up,' she said to herself, `it would have been a dreadfully ugly child; but it makes rather a handsome pig, I think.' " L. Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland 78-79 (1892).17. People v. Ramos — Ramos was convicted of first degree burglary, namely, breaking and entering of an inhabited dwelling. He testified that when he entered the house, however, he found the occupant had apparently died some time earlier. (So he just grabbed the microwave, and ran.) The D.A. argued that it was still burlgary of an “inhabited” dwelling because the owner had the “intent” to return when he evidently laid down and died in his sleep. The court of appeal concluded, however, that that “intent” to return only applied if the person actually has the capability to return. With no evidence that the occupant was alive when Ramos broke in, the court modified his conviction to a lower-level crime. (Cf., however, Stambovksy, above.)18. Zim v. Western Publishing Company — Those of us who grew up in the 1950s or 1960s fondly remember a series of books by Herbert S. Zim, known as the Golden Guides — colorful, heavily illustrated books for children on nature, science, and the like. But Zim got into a dispute with his publisher, resulting in a lower court judgment in favor of the publisher. Zim’s dispute came before Judge Irving Goldberg of the Fifth Circuit federal appeals court, and Goldberg decided to begin his opinion as if he were writing a different book: “In the beginning, Zim created the concept of the Golden Guides. For the earth was dark and ignorance filled the void. And Zim said, let there be enlightenment and there was enlightenment. In the Golden Guides, Zim created the heavens (STARS) (SKY OBSERVER'S GUIDE) and the earth. (MINERALS) (ROCKS and MINERALS) (GEOLOGY).” The whole case is sprinkled with lines like that, and eventually, Goldberg ruled in part in Zim’s favor — or as he put it, the lower court “shall write another chapter in the chronicle of Zim.”19. Flood v. Kuhn — Curt Flood was a center fielder who brought a lawsuit challenging major league baseball’s “reserve clause,” which effectively bound him to one team and prohibited him from peddling his talents to the highest bidder. The case reachd the U.S. Supreme Court in 1970, and Justice Harry Blackmun wrote an opinion upholding the reserve clause. The strange part of the opinion, however, is a sort of paean to baseball, a section of his opinion called “The Game,” reviewing baseball history from the 19th through mid-twentieth centuries, listing 83 legendary players. He noted that, in doing so, it risked leaving out other deserving players (even though his list ends with those who were playing around 1940). Paging Ken Burns.20. Dr. Seuss Enterprises v. Penguin Books USA, Inc. — From 1997, a cautionary tale, written in the wake of O.J. Simpson’s acquittal. Two fellows who named themselves “Dr. Juice” wrote The Cat NOT in the Hat, a rhyming account of the circus surrounding Simpson's trial. The book used the anapestic tetrameter (yes, that's what it's called) employed by Dr. Seuss in his children's books. It even showed Simpson in a crooked stove-pipe hat similar to that of the famous Seussian cat. Sample verse: "One knife? Two knife? Red knife. Dead wife." Although parody can be an exception to copyright and trademark law (see Hogg Wyld above), the thing being parodied must be the subject of the creation. Here, "Dr. Juice" simply retold the Simpson events by "borrowing" the style and symbols made famous by Dr. Seuss. The court of appeal upheld an order that all copies of The Cat NOT in the Hat be destroyed.21. Shenandoah Valley National Bank of Winchester v. Taylor - A fellow named Charles Henry created a trust directing that, every year on the last day of school before Easter and the day before Christmas, each child in the second and third grades at a specific elementary in Winchester, Virginia was to receive an equal share of the income of the trust. The court of appeal invalidated the directive, finding that for a trust to qualify as a "charitable trust," it had to do something "charitable" and not merely "benevolent." Giving each child what likely would have amounted to between $5 and $10 dollar twice a year was not a "charitable purpose."