Behavior Chart: Fill & Download for Free

It wasn’t so much of a school rule but a class rule.Our student teacher was reading us instructions for a science experiment . As she was reading, She once said the word “Poison.”I dared the boy in front of me to say it in a singsongy voice. I didn’t believe he’d actually do it and do it loudly, but he did. After a couple of times, more of our classmates joined in.My teacher, furious and red, told us that if anyone repeated that word, we would have to move our clips down on the behavior chart.Sort of like this except her consequences were a bit harsher.So immediately we stopped saying poison just like she asked. The new word was now pollution.That made her mad even more. We weren’t allowed to say those two words anymore.It did not take a lot to make her angry.~Chaoticism

My wife and I recently stopped fostering. To be honest it really came down to one fact. We did not feel supported. The last few straws came from being attacked on all sides with CYA style comments over everything and with the lockdown due to COVID, things just went insane. It wasn’t any one person or agency, just the entire system. We had 5 kids in a 3 bedroom house.Then a teacher at school filed an abuse report because a kid had a dirty jacket. Without understanding that it was his safety blanket, and that child was near to being committed to a mental institution so if we wanted to wear a slightly dirty jacket that wasn’t a fight we were going to have with him. Ware the jacket, let's focus on not self-harming.Then we got a complaint that the house was “dirty”. But nothing else. My wife and I took this seriously, and we tried to find ways to address it. But with 7 people home 24/7 even hiring a maid (which we were willing to do) would still leave things like the kitchen in a non-pristine condition. Not to mention we didn’t feel that the house was dirty to start with. Cluttered because there are so many people, just stuck inside 24/7, but not dirty.Then there was another complaint that we didn’t have enough things for the kids to do. Each child has 1–2 laptops, a tablet, a portable game system of some kind, normal toys, learning toys, and we have two cabinets full of board games. None of the kids complained about being bored. But again this was in the COIVD lockdown, so we're not going anywhere, sports are on pause, and even trips to the park are not possible. It’s like 2 months of rainy days. Before the lockdown we went camping, two of the kids were old enough to be in sports outside of school. Two were in school-based activities, and one in boy scouts.Then there was another complaint that the “good behavior” chart didn’t have enough smiles on it. Of course not, we're all crammed in here for months, there are going to be more bad days than normal. Why is that so unexpected?Then there was another complaint about our training, how we needed to have specific training. We were all for this, but instead of asking us or talking to us about it first, the way it was gone about was an order and not a conversation.Finally with COVID closing the schools, we converted one of our rooms (not a spare room mind you) into a makeshift schoolroom, and we did our best to fill in for the schools where we could. Again 4 students (1 baby). But that caused a “complaint” as well because we didn’t allow the kids to use their computers on the teacher's schedules. I get that but that was totally optional anyway, and we opted out because 4 kids all have to attend more “zoom meetings” a day then I do as an adult business owner was very disruptive.At each point, everyone agrees that we did nothing wrong, but that we needed to CYA a little bit more. Like taking pictures after the dishes are done so that people can see the kitchen is clean (never mind that 3 meals a day for 7 people are 21 plates forks and spoons, it’s ok if we take a picture to show that were cleaning daily even though everyone there is no proof that we were not.They wanted us to buy more for the kids to do and video them playing with it. Again everyone acknowledges that there was plenty for them to do but we needed to CYA with video.They wanted us to “just make up” a behavior chart. Screw it’s use and the fact that it worked very well, even if times were momentarily a bit more stressful, just make one up and have each kid get between 5 and 6 smiles a week. Just to CYA.The training we needed to take. Again, we were ok with this, though it was an order and not an ask. Oh but wait COVID means no one can offer the training right now, and with no school and no child care, when were we supposed to take it. The only place that even offered the training they wanted during the pre-COVID days strictly states NO CHILDREN. And the training wasn’t a response to anything in particular. Just a “hey let's try this out with this kid”.There answer to the school situation was to increase the number of per day meetings by 2–3 a day. (totaling in about 4–7 a day depending on the day). Never mind that we opted out because that’s just too much for a child.So all of that, with 0 support, we decided it was time to stop.

Well, I think most parents can relate to what you’re feeling. And that’s good you’re aware of your emotions and want to find ways to keep control of your anger. So, I have to agree with the advice to take a step back and take a deep breath when you find yourself losing control. Even the timeout Susan mentioned can give you a needed moment to let your temper die down.Another suggestion might be to sit down with your child ahead of time (before the bad behavior occurs) and come up with a list of consequences (such as a behavior chart) for when they act out. That way you’re not just reacting when they act out, but can calmly enforce whatever you set in place. This also takes away any excuse they may have that they didn’t know better.Hope this helps!