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Christian perspective, so this might sound like gibberish to non-believers:Is it safe to say that by “religious mentality,” you mean people being obsessed with going to church day and night in order to get blessed and be “delivered” or gullibly believing and doing things because their “Daddy in the Lord” said so? If this is correct, the cure that we need is a grace revolution and it is happening already. What many of the pastors here are teaching is not the gospel but something totally different that is driven by fear - fear of God's judgment.This preaching of a different gospel, powered by wicked or just plain ignorant church leaders, is the cause of the “religious mentality” of most churchgoers, and not just in Nigeria. Getting the message of Christ right is the cure. Right believing always produces right living.Some answers have highlighted churchgoers' laziness and total dependence on “manna from heaven” as the key factor in this equation; I beg to differ on this. Many pastors here, especially those operating megachurches, will never tell you to expect something from being lazy, eat grass or do anything as comical. Some have post-graduate degrees from STEM fields. Scientists. They preach strongly on “the one who does not work must not eat” alongside the value of a good education as a means of self-improvement. Their sheep believe strongly in this, to the extent of thinking that God will be angry with them if they do not “maximise every opportunity” to learn and earn, yet this “religious mentality” persists. My parents and I partook of the Kool Aid for a long, long time- it does not discriminate based on how industrious a person is or level of education.Herein lies the problem: people who believe in God are being deceived into having a wrong opinion of God. The preachers of this wrong opinion are very moral, preach strongly against sin, are all for righteousness and always seem like they just finished having lunch with Jesus. But their own method of attaining righteousness is not by what Christ has done but what you must do, a direct contradiction of God's word. See Romans 5:19– “By one man's disobedience many were made sinners, so also by one Man's obedience many will be made righteous.”These people hinge your salvation on you and your ability to obey the law, sow seed, etc (which cannot make any righteous before God according to Romans 3:20) and reject the freely given gift of everlasting righteousness that Christ died that we might have.For instance, giving. The very popular situation where a preacher puts you on edge with time-bound donations, makes you feel like you lost something and are now prey to the devil because you missed a special anointing service or asks you to "sow a seed now" so that God can owe you a job or a house. People actually borrow money in order to comply with their timelines. With their bank details flashing on TV screens, such preachers usually say things like:"There's a special window open for anyone who gives or pledges such and such amount of money right now. Now. Right now. The window is about to close now so hurry. You don't want to miss God's goodness and mercy at this special time. Going, going, gone!"But wait a minute! The popular Psalm 23 says “…goodness and mercy shall pursue me…” when “The Lord is my Shepherd,” and not when we sow a seed! You who cannot pledge their very specific amounts feel like you have missed an opportunity for God to bless you and are now prey to poverty. In essence, they lie that God blessing you depends on your own ability to give or do certain things by your own strength.While this may apply to people that are under the law of Moses, it isn't so for we who are in Christ (under the New Covenant of grace) where, because of Christ, we receive all things FREELY from God and not because we did things to make us deserving. Romans 8:32 says:“He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?”Yet this does not foster laziness.The “give now, or else” situation is akin to a parent letting her child spend the night alone in school and without care because the child was not in the place where they agreed for her to be picked up. If the mom cannot find her child, she will turn the school upside down until she finds her to take her home — goodness and mercy in pursuit of the lost! Her priority is her child's well-being and happiness. Plus, the child's ability to be at the right place and at the right time is dependent on the kind of training she is receiving from her parent. To us, Christ says in Matt. 7:11—“If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!”Even parental love in its pure form does not breed laziness, waiting for handouts or trying to foist your parents on others as “the only good parent.” Neither does it breed discriminating against others because they have refused to leave their own parents and beliefs for yours as many think believers are wont to do. A child that knows that she is loved will study hard to get good grades and do her best to come out tops in everything to make her parents proud. Even employees that know that they are loved are likely to put in their best effort at all times.But “Christians” with the wrong belief that God is a hard taskmaster that will punish them at every wrong turn and only blesses them because they sowed seed will put in less than the barest minimum and still expect to get paid for their actions; this is not Christianity. The early church were model citizens. Paul who wrote about two-thirds of the new testament supported himself via Tentmaking while living and preaching in Corinth. Paul's purpose in working was to set an example for the Christians, desiring that they not become idle in their expectation of the return of Christ, but that they would work to support themselves.What did you do to make your own parents clothe and feed you with their very best? Would you really withhold care from your own child unless he first fasts for 70 days, even if he was nasty? You will train him up in the way that he should go…and with Christ, we have God who never fails as our Father and Trainer; we can't but become like Christ. Laziness and this “religious mentality” are not among His virtues.The warped message that is being preached makes you believe that God will let the devil have a go at you when you sin and will not bless unless you “play your part.” This contradicts His word for those in Christ in Romans 8:32 and several other bible verses too.In Christ, we are not under law but under grace. People are yet to realise that they and that Daddy in the Lord that controls their lives (with the fear of God's judgment) are saved the same way - by grace through faith- and not because he has paid his dues by being more righteous or because he fasted more. See Eph. 2:8-9.The cure for this “religious mentality” is right believing and many Nigerians' hearts are being transformed by the Spirit already. No amount of human effort can do it. When the believing is right, right living will follow.

It’s taken me a long time in the course of my life to figure out I often didn’t know what I didn’t know.Over the years I’ve stopped doing the following things which have really improved my life on many levels:I’ve stopped living my life for anyone else but me.For so many years I lived according to what my parents or friends or life partners felt I should do. Living my life for anyone besides me left me completely miserable and empty inside. Yes, I do still take my loved ones in consideration when I make major life decisions or changes, but now I consider my own feelings as a priority rather than an afterthought.Only if you can truly love yourself can you love another person.I’ve stopped accepting gifts.At this time in our world where so many people are hungry or need shelter, the last thing I need is more possessions I might not need or want. Why not take those funds and use them to help someone get a good hot meal or a safe place to sleep?Giving to others is truly a blessing and that is what I strive to do.I’ve stopped allowing toxic people, users, frenemies or generally negative people into my inner life circle.Whenever I can possible eliminate any type of toxic people from my life I do so as kindly as I can. I’ve learned over the years that being around people who are mentally, emotionally, spiritually or physically unhealthy can be oddly contagious.I want to fill my life with positive people and experiences which I strive to constantly do.I’ve stopped owning a car.It’s not that I can’t afford to own a car, I just came to the conclusion that it’s no longer a necessity. Before COVID-19 I used to absolutely love to take Ride Share. I enjoyed not having to worry about operating a vehicle in stressful traffic and having time to myself to listen to music or read.With COVID-19 I have been sheltering and working at home, so I don’t even leave my house except to take walks. All my friends and loved ones still have cars, so if I need a vehicle in an emergency I know I always have transportation.I love that in a very small way I am doing my part to reduce the unnecessary utilization of resources which clog the roadways and add to pollution.I’ve stopped watching or listening to the mainstream news media.Actually I still scan the news, but as the media has morphed from being focused on reporting the facts and transitioned into a lot of fake news or news presented merely for ratings and/or viewers, I no longer trust the establishment.Yes, I do keep track of what’s going on, but I actively seek out alternative news sources from a wide range of camps in order to form my own opinions about what is happening in the world rather than be influenced by fear mongering journalists who cloud the true issues.I’ve stopped hanging on to possessions I no longer need or want just because they have sentimental value or history.Over the last few years I have cleaned out all of my closets and donated a large amount of my clothing to charity. It feels good to helps others who might need a warm coat or a gently worn pair of jeans. It also makes space in my life so that I can breathe easier and not feel I’m buried in unnecessary possessions or clutter.If I haven’t worn or used something in the last 6 months it very well may wind up in the donation box for someone who might need it.I’ve stopped jumping to any conclusions about anything.There’s a fine line between being spontaneous and living a life filled with wonderful adventures versus just making snap decisions. I have learned to balance. No matter what happens in my life, I always give myself time to pause and take as much time as I need to make an informed decision.I do try to still be appropriately spontaneous, but in a more thoughtful and considerate way.I’ve stopped drinking any type of sodas or other sugar-laden drinks.As much as I used to love an ice cold cola or diet cola, I know how incredibly unhealthy they are. In 2004 I just decided to stop drinking any type of sodas, whether diet or not. I also don’t drink any type of products with lots of sugar.I’ve stopped forgetting to make time in my life to read.I used to always be too busy to read. I love to read and it really helps expand my life in so many wonderful ways. To break myself of the habit of always being too busy, I have scheduled in time every single day to stop and read either an old fashioned book or an e-book on my iPad or similar device.I’ve always written in some capacity in all of my careers and business ventures. It really is true that you can’t be a great writer if you’re not first a great reader.I’ve stopped neglecting sleep.As a lifelong self-directed workaholic who loves to work more than almost anything else, I’ve always shortchanged myself on sleep.I’ve learned how incredibly unhealthy it is to deprive myself on the number of hours of deep and restful sleep I get every day. I diligently focus on going to bed at the same time every night and sleeping my best number of hours.Without a good night’s rest I can’t be as productive as I am when I have had the sleep my body needsBest wishes to all.

Personal Development:These are all questions that lie at the root of any attempt at self-improvement.My entire blog is dedicated to personal development, in all its forms.I invite you to discover the principles that I consider most important to improve your life.I also invite you to take advantage of the many free resources that I put at your disposal. Here I have given a detailed information regarding Personal Development and to know more, search “Zoe Talent Solutions” in Google.1. Put love (in a broad sense) at the base of our actionsIt is often difficult to put love at the center of our lives and actions.We do not have time, we are too busy, too stressed ...Yet, loving and caring for ourselves and for others would simplify our lives.For example, if we try to control others, we waste our energy.To apply this principle, we must first accept, that is, we can commit to people and circumstances as they come to us. This opening is a form of love.Another important dimension of this "love" lies in responsibility. It means to blame nobody for what is happening to us.Since all problems contain solutions and opportunities, this responsibility helps us to transform each situation favorably.2. The detachmentBuddhism teaches us to want first of all what we have, to be content with it.Without becoming Buddhist, with detachment and letting go, if we wish to acquire anything, we can first abandon the attachment we give to it.This seems paradoxical: we combine at the same time the intention to obtain what we desire and the detachment to lose it. We are always attached to what things are for us.Thus, the detachment alleviates the conscience and nourishes the freedom. We can get everything, we can lose everything.It helps us to detach ourselves and to see how much happiness is in us.3. Our beliefs forge our self-esteemWhat we think about ourselves becomes absolutely truthful to ourselves, even if it's absolutely wrong!As a result, each of us has a responsibility for what we live, the best and the worst.Since we have control over our thoughts and our thoughts build our life experiences and emotions, we can change the way we think and talk to create new, more constructive experiences.For example, you can say, "Everyone can always help me" and not "The others are here to take advantage of me. "Each of these beliefs will generate very different experiences and emotions. And what we believe becomes true for ourselves.4. Find your way and your life goalsEach person can find his way and goals to achieve in his life.Each has at least one unique talent and a personal way of expressing it.Each person always has abilities that allow him to do some things better than others. But for each talent, there are also unique needs.And when these needs match the creative expression of your talent, this is what gives rise to the spark that gives meaning to your life.A fundamental goal is to find out who we really are. It is also necessary to express one's talent as often as possible, when one has found it, and to direct one's expression to serve (and first) the others.5. We all have a fundamental valueWe all have equal intrinsic value that no one can take away.Unfortunately, we rarely believe in this fundamental value. For example, the person who will be convinced that no one can appreciate it will experience more rejection experiences.The goal is to drop the destructive beliefs and to see how absolutely we are, which will help us to look kindly around us.With such a vision of life, you will find that people who already value you will love you more and express your love more easily to others.6. The gift, prerequisite to abundanceDonation always accompanies the possibility of receiving, because human relationships operate in a dynamic of reciprocity.Thus, since relationships are a state of continual exchange with others, to stop expressing openness and altruism is to prepare oneself for conflict and loneliness.This is why the "gift" is also essential: it promotes the continuity of this exchange and puts us in the most favorable conditions to receive.The more we give and the more we receive. And I'm not talking about the famous (and smoky) "law of attraction".I speak of nourishing the cooperation that has built the foundations of human civilizations since the beginning of time. To improve this area of ​​your life, you can make the following decision: every time you get in touch with someone, give them something.This gift does not have to be material. The most precious gifts are often immaterial, such as affection, attention, compliments, gratitude, encouragement, giving of one's time, and so on.7. We tend to reproduce the emotional environment we experienced when we were youngThe influences of our childhood help us to know each other. They are neither good nor bad.We tend to treat ourselves as our parents did and we often recreate the kinds of relationships we have had with our parents. We criticize ourselves if our parents have criticized us;we are courageous if our parents encouraged us. To clarify this trend in your life, think about your relationship with your boss, work, or your relationship, for example.If the result of this exam is negative, do not blame your parents. They did their best and could not teach you what they did not know themselves.Be compassionate with your parents and ask them to tell you about their childhood.Thus, you will better understand their beliefs - even if they are possibly destructive - and you will learn to free yourself from certain fears or thoughts that are too rigid.8. The greatest power we have is that of the present momentAll the experiences of our life derive from the moments we have lived through our past thoughts and attitudes.These moments are over. What is important now is to choose what we think, do and say in the present.This "power" comes precisely from the fact that our present is helping to shape the events we will experience tomorrow, next week, next month, and so on.So, are the thoughts you have right now negative or positive?Do they contribute to forging a future that will guarantee satisfaction and well-being?Even though we have had destructive thoughts for a long time, the past has no hold on our lives.Only the present counts and the positive change potential it holds!9. The reality we face is our thoughts, and we can change our thoughts ...No matter what problems and difficulties we will face in our life, they only form the external effects of our thoughts and our inner life.For example, the self-criticism that leads to lack of self-esteem is only a negative thought on our own.When you say, "I do not have value," this thought produces a cascade of consequences, including negative emotions such as sadness and anger.As a result, if you skip this kind of thinking, you cut off the destructive consequences that usually follow.In other words, if you change your thoughts for the better, your emotions will happily follow in the same direction.Here are some keys to summarize what we have just seen:Listen and respect the wisdom of your body that expresses itself through comfort or discomfort.Whenever you react to a situation, listen to yourself by asking yourself this question: "How do I feel about what's happening to me? "Invest in the present because the present is the only real moment that exists.Accept what comes into your life and, most importantly, what it teaches you. Because each event always manifests itself as it should be.Take time to rest in silence, to have access to this inner dialogue with yourself. Because it is in silence that you can best connect to the source of what you are.Give up your need to be approved and recognized by others. You are the only judges of what is worth living, because only you can discover the infinite wealth that is hidden in you.When you react angrily to others or circumstances, realize that you are actually fighting against yourself. When you free yourself from this anger, you free yourself from the weight and damage it causes you.Give up the burden of judgment and live with new and saving lightness. Judgments make you define situations as good or bad, whereas they must be as they are, simply. This is another way of letting go.10. What the ancient values ​​of the Kalahari Bushmen can bring usIn closing, let me share a different perspective of personal development, although it overlaps with what I just mentioned earlier in this article.For thousands of years, people in the Kalahari region of southern Africa have developed healthy and sustainable life and values ​​in harmony with the environment. About 100,000 Bushmen, or " Bushmen", live in the Kalahari region.They have been the first inhabitants of this region for more than 25,000 years and include several tribes with their own language and way of life but who share some profound values.Laurens van der Post, a South African explorer, spent long time with these Bushmen. He tried to understand them and defended them when governments dispossessed them of their lands and flouted their rights.Here are some of their values ​​and their ancestral life practices that this explorer has observed and which are all ways to enrich our lives.Respect what we have and satisfy ourselves Even when the Europeans arrived in the XVII th century, it seems that unlike the invaders, the Bushmenwere not concerned in any way of material possessions.They own nothing, owe nothing to anyone, but share everything.This detachment vis-à-vis material goods can be inspiring in our world that attaches so much importance.The love of othersThe Bushmen also seem gifted with great generosity. If they meet people lost in the bush, frightened and hungry, they hurry to provide shelter and food.These natives do not cultivate aggressiveness and their traditions and legends do not magnify wars or conflicts.The Bushmen are particularly peaceful, cultivate loyal friendships and have good relations with their neighbors.