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In today’s world, this will be considered a horribly politically-incorrect answer, but… love is a choice. It really is. It’s a decision.About nine years ago, my wife and I went through a “rough patch”. We’d been married for sixteen years, and we’d finally gotten a little miracle that we’d been praying for for many years: a baby daughter (who by this time was 18 months old). I loved (and love) our girl, but it seemed that my wife and I had never gotten along very well. Let me put it this way: when the police showed up to break up our fights (this happened twice), “incompatible” was not the word that they used. Shortly after our daughter was born, I heard from an old girlfriend online—more than just an old girlfriend: my first love, the love of my life (or so I’d let myself believe). I took the opportunity to get out of a bad marriage. I filed for divorce. Our daughter would be fine, right? Not ideal… but plenty of happy, healthy kids come out of broken homes… right?Long story short, after five months of separation—and after Pam signed the divorce papers—something occurred to me: the grass is not always greener on the other side. Whatever problems—whatever “incompatibilities” I had with my wife—would likely rear their ugly heads, in whatever form, in my next relationship. So, what was the point? Was I going to be “that guy”—hopping from marriage to marriage until I finally end up alone at the end of my life?So, my wife and I talked. I filled her in on my “revelation”, and she filled me in on some of her own. We decided—DECIDED—to reconcile. To make it work. I DECIDED to love my wife. SHE is the love of my life—not some old girlfriend from my childhood—and the fringe benefit of it all is that our daughter would grow up in a loving home with both parents. To this day, I DECIDE every day that I’m madly in love with my wife and that I could never be this happy with any other woman in the world… and you know what? It’s true!!Love is not a feeling. It’s not an emotion. It may involve those things, but love is a very grownup, very mature decision. I applaud you for asking the question that you have… and I hope that you DECIDE to devote your life to making that woman and your baby as happy as they can possibly be!I’ll leave you with a pic of Pam and me. This is us on our 25th wedding anniversary, which we celebrated in July…

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Yes, read his collected papers and transcribed lectures, where the author is Nikola Tesla.Don’t miss Leyland Anderson’s material from the Beograd museum. Also, read many old newspaper interviews, quoting Tesla’s actual words. There are several books, one dating from 1893:The Inventions, Researches, and Writings of Nikola Tesla (1893 Commorford Martin, editor)Colorado Springs Notes, 1899–1900The Nikola Tesla Treasury: Nikola Tesla: 9781934451892: Amazon.com: BooksNikola Tesla on His Work With Alternating Currents and Their Application to Wireless Telegraphy, Telephony, and Transmission of Power: An Extended Interview (Tesla Presents Series, Pt. 1): Leland I. Anderson: 9781893817012: Amazon.com: Books [1992, new mat’l found in Beograd Tesla museum]My Inventions: Nikola Tesla: 9781484127353: Amazon.com: Books [Tesla’s autobiography]There are several online collections of Tesla lectures, newspaper interviews and articles:Pepe's Tesla Pages: Nikola TeslaNikola Tesla Articles from Tesla UniverseTeslacollection.com “the most comprehensive compilation of newspaper and periodical material ever assembled by or about Nikola Tesla”NikolaTesla.fr :: Les DocumentsTesla’s patents are available online, but they’re tough going, full of obscure and obsolete terms, and can be quite misleading if divorced from detailed historical knowledge behind each one. Not really recommended for beginners…Nikola Tesla Patents from Tesla UniversePepe's Tesla Pages: Nikola Tesla (patents .gif format)For example, “radiant energy” is actually William Crookes’ term for ionizing radiation, in use years before radioactivity was discovered. (Radiant energy was sometimes used interchangeably with “radiant matter.”) Tesla was a great Crookes fan, and used this term extensively.Therefore in old Tesla writings, when you see “radiant energy” this, and “radiant energy” that, you need to know that he’s talking about Crookes’ term for invisible rays: x-rays and/or Beta radiation. Without this simple fact, many readers will acquire an extremely distorted view of Tesla’s writings, and either believe that Tesla discovered a new form of radiation unknown to contemporary physicists, or they assume that Tesla was a simpleton who was reporting non-existent phenomena. Wrong. Tesla was simply using common terms from the 1890s. So, in most cases, simply cross out “radiant energy” and instead write “x-rays” or “MeV electrons.” Beware, “radiant energy” isn’t the only archaic and misleading term in old 1890s-era Tesla writings.